Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

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Nexus_1101
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Nexus_1101 » Wed Jan 09, 2008 5:05 pm UTC

or the name of a cartoon char maybe?

OOOOOHHH, PROFESSOR FANSWORTH!!!!!!
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Moo » Wed Jan 09, 2008 5:14 pm UTC

"Oh my..."

Image
Proverbs 9:7-8 wrote:Anyone who rebukes a mocker will get an insult in return. Anyone who corrects the wicked will get hurt. So don't bother correcting mockers; they will only hate you.
Hawknc wrote:FFT: I didn't realise Proverbs 9:7-8 was the first recorded instance of "haters gonna hate"

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby SoapyHobo » Wed Jan 09, 2008 5:17 pm UTC

euuegh o_O

I'm glad that image finished where it did, my mind was filled with horror as it loaded
Jack Saladin wrote:Goddamn that's an awesome ****, Soapy. Once they get around to making artificial **** and I replace my crappy original ones, I'm gonna make mine look like that.

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Nexus_1101 » Wed Jan 09, 2008 6:17 pm UTC

my eyes!!! it burns!!!
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Master Gunner » Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:23 am UTC

KAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Maseiken » Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:51 am UTC

I already did that*



*Again, a good phrase.
"GRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOWR!!!!"
(Translation: "Objection!")

Maseiken had the ball at the top of the key...

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby malec2b » Thu Jan 10, 2008 1:11 am UTC

LOAD YOUR PROGRAM. I AM YOURSELF. (sorry, listening to Karn Evil 9 by ELP)
also
NEGATIVE. LIMITED. PRIMITIVE.
and
I AM PERFECT. ARE YOU?
Last edited by malec2b on Sun Aug 31, 2008 7:13 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby simo » Thu Jan 10, 2008 1:56 am UTC

Your wife my now!

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby simo » Thu Jan 10, 2008 1:59 am UTC

better yet.

Just give two thumbs up and say.

"eeeeeeeeeyeeee"

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby simo » Thu Jan 10, 2008 2:03 am UTC

...or just make that disturbing noise woody the woodpecker makes!

"eeeoeeeooeeeeoeee eoeeeoeoe ee eh eh eh eh eh eh eh!"

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Delta » Thu Jan 10, 2008 2:23 am UTC

Become slowly less active and then start snoring.

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby keozen » Thu Jan 10, 2008 8:31 am UTC

If you happen to be a woman you could be mean and hold up a sign that says:

404 Penis not found
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby idont_know12 » Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:13 am UTC

"Is that supposed to be that color?"

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby keozen » Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:30 am UTC

Did I leave the oven on?
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Nexus_1101 » Thu Jan 10, 2008 11:43 am UTC

keozen wrote:Did I leave the oven on?

oh look the celing needs painting
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby simo » Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:06 pm UTC

Nexus_1101 wrote:
keozen wrote:Did I leave the oven on?

oh look the celing needs painting


I'm getting tired of this orgasm...

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Moo » Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:29 pm UTC

simo wrote:I'm getting tired of this orgasm...
If the sayer was a female, surely that's (a) very unlikely (it's up to you which part of the sentence I mean ;) ) and (b) a kinda-compliment, surely?
Proverbs 9:7-8 wrote:Anyone who rebukes a mocker will get an insult in return. Anyone who corrects the wicked will get hurt. So don't bother correcting mockers; they will only hate you.
Hawknc wrote:FFT: I didn't realise Proverbs 9:7-8 was the first recorded instance of "haters gonna hate"

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Moo » Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:32 pm UTC

"Now, lets evaluate. I find your foreplay acceptable but could be improved with more concentration; your use of profelactic was correct. What else? Oh yes. You reach, on average, the required time mark but you lose points for unimaginitive positions. All in all not too bad, I'd say a 6? Alright, you may continue."
Proverbs 9:7-8 wrote:Anyone who rebukes a mocker will get an insult in return. Anyone who corrects the wicked will get hurt. So don't bother correcting mockers; they will only hate you.
Hawknc wrote:FFT: I didn't realise Proverbs 9:7-8 was the first recorded instance of "haters gonna hate"

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby madjo » Thu Jan 10, 2008 12:35 pm UTC

"Are you done yet?"

or even more mean: "Have you begun already?"
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby keozen » Thu Jan 10, 2008 1:45 pm UTC

CRAP!!!! Sorry, i have to go, I think I'm standing your Mum up...
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Moo » Thu Jan 10, 2008 1:50 pm UTC

"Smile! You're on Candid Camera!"
Proverbs 9:7-8 wrote:Anyone who rebukes a mocker will get an insult in return. Anyone who corrects the wicked will get hurt. So don't bother correcting mockers; they will only hate you.
Hawknc wrote:FFT: I didn't realise Proverbs 9:7-8 was the first recorded instance of "haters gonna hate"

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby keozen » Thu Jan 10, 2008 2:01 pm UTC

".........and now it's SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE!!!"
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Nexus_1101 » Thu Jan 10, 2008 2:21 pm UTC

Moo wrote:"Now, lets evaluate. I find your foreplay acceptable but could be improved with more concentration; your use of profelactic was correct. What else? Oh yes. You reach, on average, the required time mark but you lose points for unimaginitive positions. All in all not too bad, I'd say a 6? Alright, you may continue."


tell them that they have to read a full 194 page report of the last 'session' before they can even touch you.

or the sex and forplay safty manual (if you have read "good omens" just think about the man who has to push the rock up the hill)
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby keozen » Thu Jan 10, 2008 3:11 pm UTC

Two words:

Make Notes
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Nexus_1101 » Thu Jan 10, 2008 3:35 pm UTC

one word

doodle...
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby MotorToad » Fri Jan 11, 2008 6:44 pm UTC

I can't remember the episode or whom exactly it was, but on Futurama there was that... prostitute (?) that was with Fry, I love the was she said his name. Something like "Oh you're so handsome [robot voice]Philip J. Fry[/robot] you make me hot!" I'm pretty sure talking to your partner like that'd get everything out of the mood.
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby mandalynn » Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:12 pm UTC

keozen wrote:".........and now it's SATURDAY NIGHT LIVE!!!"

*ahem*
"LIIIIIIIVE from NEW YORK, it's SAAAAATURDAY NIIIIIIGHT!!!"

Sorry, I couldn't resist

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Mandiful » Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:35 pm UTC

I haven't read this entire thread yet to see if someone else has already suggested it, but . . .

I think yelling out your own name would be pretty funny and inappropriate.

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Conspiricy » Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:35 pm UTC

"OKAY! LETS SWAP PLACES!!!!"

"Oh, wait...I just realised how little fun this is with you...STACY! ITS YOUR TURN!"

"Penis goes where?!"

"FALLLCOOOOOONNNNNN...PUUUUUUUUUNNNNNCCCCCHHHHH!...ABOTION!"
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby westcydr » Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:47 pm UTC

Is it messed up that I have had a girl say to me, "you're better than your brother"?
Yeah, I thought so..
I think the old.. "Honey, I think I left the condom in you" line is one that girls don't like to hear..
Also "I can't WAIT to upload this video" is not a popular one..
Nor, usually, is the "whoops, wrong hole" line, although, usually, it can't be heard over other, louder noises... often followed by castration..
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby keozen » Fri Jan 11, 2008 10:27 pm UTC

*sings*

I put my penis in, my penis out, in out, in out, shake it all about,

we do the hokey kokey and we turn around, that's what it's all about!!!
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Mandiful » Fri Jan 11, 2008 10:51 pm UTC

keozen wrote:*sings*

I put my penis in, my penis out, in out, in out, shake it all about,

we do the hokey kokey and we turn around, that's what it's all about!!!


Genius.

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby OmegaLord » Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:39 am UTC

"Dear LORD SATAN!"
So what do you guys know about *glances down at sheet* the kingdoms of orgasms
but I just don't see why someone would tape themselves together.
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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Maseiken » Sat Jan 12, 2008 1:43 am UTC

The full and completeness of Hugh Laurie's song, "America"
"GRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOWR!!!!"
(Translation: "Objection!")

Maseiken had the ball at the top of the key...

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Zak » Sat Jan 12, 2008 5:32 am UTC

I choose YOU PIKACHU!!!!!
*waggles eyebrows*

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Celestial » Sat Jan 12, 2008 6:47 am UTC

you can do it junior !! you can cummmm theres nothing to it!! *claps*

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby yelly » Sat Jan 12, 2008 8:21 pm UTC

*look at girl's face half way through* *make puzzled expression* *pull out PDA* "Fuck, your the wrong girl!"

before sex:
*no erection*
*look at naked girl*
*look at penis*
"I told you she wasn't good enough"
...
"So there are 3 guards, one always tells the truth, one always lies and the third answers randomly"
"But I only want to know the fucking time!"

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby Zak » Sun Jan 13, 2008 1:25 am UTC

(from the movie walk hard) look really bored and slightly off to the side, when s/he says something answer thusly,

"Oh! You're still there?"
*waggles eyebrows*

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby simo » Sun Jan 13, 2008 1:36 am UTC

"I have ridden the mighty moon worm!"

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Re: Worst Things to Shout Out During Sex

Postby simo » Sun Jan 13, 2008 1:41 am UTC

YOO SAAAAY PEEEEPPLLEEE GONNNAAA DDIIIIEE?


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