Grammar Nazism

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Nebuduck
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Grammar Nazism

Postby Nebuduck » Mon Apr 21, 2008 5:57 pm UTC

I don't know how well this will work - I thought of it while drunk, it seemed like a good idea. I think it'll either go down atrociously, or pretty well. Basically, the idea is to find faults with the previous post's grammar, spelling and the general quality of the english. Scoring will go something like this:

For each mistake noticed, the poster will gain 1 point, which will bu modified by a multiplier depending on how long the post has been up for:

Multipliers: 5 if the post has been up for less than one hour.
3 if the post has been up for 1-3 hours.
1 if the post has been up 3-5 hours
0 if the post is older than 5 hours.

Furthermore, you may only post if you are able to correct the previous poster, unless 5 hours have elapsed, in which case anyone may post.

The person to have the most points shall win the prize of being reviled by all users of poor English the world over.

Judging by the general intellectual level of this forum, one of two things will happen - either people will constantly post in immaculate English, and no-one will be able to correct them, in which case this game will fail completely, or we'll get all sorts of hugely pedantic corrections in which case it could be quite fun.

Oh, also, try to make sure your post is of a reasonable length. Maybe write to the previous poster in some sort of archaic form - "My esteemed colleague, while you have my greatest respect in most matters, I beg to inform you of a few minor errors in your use of the English language..." for example, or post some other form of random musing.

Also, remember, you don't lose points for bad grammar, so spending ages looking over your post for errors will be pretty futile. Also, no editing of posts please.

There, I think I've clarified it. Lets see how it goes.

Edit: OK, I'm editing my own post - grossly against the rules, but I felt it was necessary. Minus 100 points to myself. Please don't comment on grammatical inaccuracies in the edit, since that would throw everything off. Individuals should keep track of their own scores, since I truly am too lazy to do anything like that. Also, if you are commenting on any post BUT the penultimate post, then you receive a single point for every NEW error corrected, however soon after the post, unless 5 hours has passed, in which case you receive no points. I think that should clear things up.
Last edited by Nebuduck on Mon Apr 21, 2008 8:22 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Chrismclegless » Mon Apr 21, 2008 7:26 pm UTC

Nebuduck, I have some problems with your post. For starters, you mistyped the word "be" in the second paragraph, instead saying, "bu". I find that this is only a minor error, and is obviously not your ignorance shining through, but I do feel the need to comment.
What I am disappointed with however, is your use of period breaks in a list, which you correctly initiated with a colon. If you were going to use periods, I believe you should have bullet pointed the list, although it still grates slightly with the length of the items in the list. I If I had written the OP, I would have used a semicolon, and found a different way to phrase the items. This may just be because I like semicolons though.

One other thing that stood out is your use of the word, "Oh", to start your 6th paragraph. Though this may sound correct, that is only because we are conditioned to hearing people speak in this fashion, and it is actually incorrect in the written form of the language.

There are a couple of points I made that I am not sure of however, so I would appreciate someone older and wiser than myself to corroborate my points.

This game could work out, but I fear people are likely to make very few errors, unless they are deliberate and FOR TEH LULZ.

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TomBot
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby TomBot » Mon Apr 21, 2008 8:11 pm UTC

Since you're from the UK, I will overlook your (admittedly logical, but incorrect) practice of putting punctuation marks outside of double quotes. You could use your time more productively by learning when it is appropriate to use a comma -- I feel one should be present before both uses of the word "however," but not before your quotation of the word "Oh."

Regarding the original post: The two clauses of the sentence beginning "I thought of it while drunk" must be separated either by a conjunction such as "and" or by a semicolon or em-dash; a comma is insufficient. You should always capitalize proper nouns such as "English." Small numbers should be written out, which rule you violate when typing "1 point." Finally, you must always remember the apostrophe in contractions such as "let's." In addition, I will take this opportunity to agree with my predecessor's suggestions. Though I am unaware of his age, I am his senior in post count (thus wisdom) and hope to reassure him.

I sincerely apologize for finding fault with other than the penultimate post, however, I feel some duty to my language not to let such errors go unpunished. I pray you update the scoring system to reward myself and others for this service. Further I must inquire, must we tally our own scores?

It's pretty strange how typing with such attention to detail so naturally breeds such pretentious language.

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Ramses IV
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Ramses IV » Mon Apr 21, 2008 9:29 pm UTC

Although I'm not sure about this, I'm fairly certain that you overused the word "must" In the last sentence of the third paragraph.
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Nebuduck » Mon Apr 21, 2008 9:42 pm UTC

TomBot, while I very much appreciate your contribution to our dialog, I am afraid the eloquent progression of your piece was marred somewhat by a small number of minor grammatical errors. While I would not generally presume to correct someone over such minor details, it seems that you are an intelligent gentleman who will, no doubt, appreciate criticism of your use of a language which you claim as your own.

My main qualm is with the final sentence of your tertiary paragraph. While I am evidently not so well versed in the varied rules of English grammar as yourself, I do believe that a comma should have been used between "Further" and "I" - although I may well be mistaken.

In addition, while it is not a correction as such, the use of the adverb "pretty" in the final sentence of your contribution jars somewhat with the general register of the previous section of your ever so elegant prose.

Finally, I have noted some of your issues with the point scoring system, and have edited my initial post in order to account for these queries. I understand that this is against the rules, and have therefore docked myself 100 points.

With regards to Ramses, I apologies for addressing TomBot's post before your own, however, I felt that the content of his post was of a more urgent nature. May I suggest that you investigate the use of capitalisation in the English language?

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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Killy_mcgee » Mon Apr 21, 2008 9:45 pm UTC

What? There is no possible way I could beat that.
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tiny
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby tiny » Mon Apr 21, 2008 10:14 pm UTC

I found a fault in Ramses' post. Look: '... word "must" In the...'. The 'I' should be a small one.
I want this post to sound childish to contrast all the big, old words you throw around up there. You snobs.
:-D

EDIT: No, wait. Capitalization is when you use big letters, right?
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Cornelius » Mon Apr 21, 2008 10:20 pm UTC

tiny wrote::-D



Smiley faces are not part of the English language, thank you.

EDIT: +5!
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby trvsdrlng » Mon Apr 21, 2008 10:24 pm UTC

tiny, while your contribution is much valued, I feel the need to point out (if I may) a few grammatical errors in your post. When you quoted Ramses, you used single quotes. You should have used double quotes. This (') is a single quote. This (") is a double quote. Please learn and understand the difference. I will also mention your incorrect usage of three periods to represent an ellipsis. I believe I now have four points: one for each attempted double quote and one for each attempted ellipsis. Once again, thank you for taking the time to post here at xkcd.

Edit: I failed to read the section in the original post about the multiplier. I now have twenty points.
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby sckego » Mon Apr 21, 2008 11:12 pm UTC

Trvsdrlng, I would just like to point out that when beginning a sentence with a proper noun, such as the name 'tiny,' the generally accepted American formatting requires one to capitalize the first letter, even if the proper noun is commonly written in all lowercase. An example of this formatting can be found in my previous sentence, where 'tiny' is given in all lowercase due to its position in the middle of the sentence, whereas your name was given with a capital 'T' due to its being the first word.

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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Maseiken » Wed Apr 23, 2008 1:02 am UTC

While the post you referred to did indeed contain the word 'tiny' followed by a comma, I so no real need for you to quote the comma as well, and it would probably be far more appropriate outside the inverted commas. Even more appropriate would be a Full-stop, and the next word ('the') being capitalised, as you are now talking about a different subject, however related.
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Ramses IV » Wed Apr 23, 2008 1:06 am UTC

You seem to have misspelled "saw", putting instead "so".
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Babam » Wed Apr 23, 2008 2:01 am UTC

Ramses IV wrote:You seem to have misspelled "saw", putting instead "so".

I find fault with your post, it should be "Instead, putting (or you put) so."
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby michaelandjimi » Wed Apr 23, 2008 2:43 am UTC

Babamthegrunt wrote:I find fault with your post, it should be "Instead, putting (or you put) so."

My dear Babamthegrunt, it appears that you may have overlooked the flaws in your own post in your earnest attack on Ramses IV's post. Allow me to rectify this problem.

Your first problem is that of tense. You should have "found fault", rather than "find fault", due to the fact that you had discovered the fault whilst examining his post previously. You are, quite clearly, not finding fault at the present moment.

Furthermore, the comma in your sentence has been misused. A superior alternative would have been the en dash - with a space on either side. A lesser, but by no means useless, alternative would have been the period, followed by capitalisation of the word "it".

Finally, your sentence lacks clarity. When you proffered the word "it", you did not clearly define what you were referring to. Perhaps you should have replaced it with "Rather than "putting instead "so".", you should have written "Instead, putting (or you put) so."". Merely quoting the original sentence and not clarifying is just not good enough.

I hope that I have been of assistance.

Your signature is also incorrect grammatically.

The word "Warning" should have a colon after it, in its syntactical-deductive form. Furthermore, the first two commas should be replaced by semicolons, as you lack a coordinating conjunction in each place.

The "psp" should be capitalised - it is an acronym.

Finally, the usage of "and" with a comma preceding is not allowed in this circumstance. I suggest you learn some more about grammar.

Thankyou for bearing with me. I now have 32 points.
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Nebuduck
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Nebuduck » Wed Apr 23, 2008 2:31 pm UTC

To whom it may concern,

While this is not a correction of grammar, I feel it necessary to point out a number of rules which have been ignored by a large proportion of posters. I shall also clarify the rules in order to ensure this does not happen in the future.

Initially, it should be noted that my original post suggests that a post should be of a "reasonable length". Since this is unclear, I shall clarify it. The post should not consist of less than ten sentences. This is essentially to ensure that the thread isn't full of post of the following form:

"Mr Previous Poster, you forgot to capitalise the first letter of your sentence."


Because, while this is valid as a correction, it does not leave much for the next poster to correct. I understand that occasionally you will not have sufficient corrections for the previous poster to compose a post of the desired length, however, it is not outside the rules to discuss items other than the previous poster's appalling use of grammar. Maybe tell us what you had for breakfast, or why you forgot to hand your homework in.

Now, something that I believe was made clear in the original post is that there should be no editing. I made this very clear. Clear to the extent of docking myself 100 points when I was forced to go back and edit my original post. This rule stands. It is a very strict rule. You see, the problem is that it's very easy to post something, and then think "Oops, I made a typographical error with that word!" and then edit it. This is completely not within the spirit of the game. Therefore, there will be NO edits. Not even to inform us of how many points you just scored with your one sentence post. Feel free to double post, I have no problem with that (although you will not score points for correcting your first post in your second post).

Anyone who has edited their post shall now lose all points. It is breaking the rules in such a complete manner that I feel this punishment is justified.

Michaelandjimi, may I take this opportunity to draw your attention to the third paragraph of your post, and the sentence:

michaelandjimi wrote:Perhaps you should have replaced it with "Rather than "putting instead "so".", you should have written "Instead, putting (or you put) so."".


Due to the fact that you have an odd number of quotation marks, it should be evident that the grammar in this section is appalling. Furthermore, your use of spaces and periods sickens me. This is all.
Last edited by Nebuduck on Wed Apr 23, 2008 2:34 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Nebuduck » Wed Apr 23, 2008 2:34 pm UTC

Michaelandjimi, I apologise, my counting skills are evidently absent today. In that section you did indeed have an even number of quotation marks, however, I still feel that their positioning and your use of spaces and periods leaves something to be desired.

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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Ended » Wed Apr 23, 2008 6:52 pm UTC

Sir,

It is with dismay that I read your latest post, which purports to correct the words of one Michaelandjimi - and yet contains two egregious errors itself. I refer, of course, to your flagrant misuse of the comma. More specifically, I find fault with the second comma of both sentence one and sentence two of your post. Here we have two clear cases where the use of the semicolon would be infinitely preferable to the use of the comma. The clause "my counting skills are evidently absent today" is only indirectly related to the preceding clause, and should be separated from it with a semicolon in order to avoid a comma splice. Likewise for your second sentence: the word "however" should be immediately preceded by a semicolon. In both cases, a carefully placed full stop followed by the capitalisation of the next letter would also suffice.

I find it tragic that one so versed in the arts of grammar as yourself should have made such an elementary mistake.

Yours,
Ended

P.S. I believe my points count now stands at two.
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby The Hyphenator » Sun Apr 27, 2008 12:24 am UTC

Ended wrote:The clause "my counting skills are evidently absent today" is only indirectly related to the preceding clause, and should be separated from it with a semicolon in order to avoid a comma splice.

Excuse me, but I am afraid I must point out a minor error in your otherwise satisfactory post. In the sentence quoted above, the comma is unnecessary because it is not separating two independent clauses. I congratulate you on your otherwise flawless grammar.

It seems I do not have enough sentences in this post to satisfy the rules. Therefore, I feel the need to post trivial and irrelevant details about my life, starting with a suggestion by the original poster. This would be, of course, what I ate for breakfast. I ate an egg for breakfast this morning along with some cereal and milk. It was quite mundane and tasteless, as it is what I have every morning. After eating breakfast, I played a video game and perused the fora for a few hours. All in all, I had a fairly ordinary Saturday morning.
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Nebuduck
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Nebuduck » Mon May 26, 2008 9:11 pm UTC

OK, I've just realised a better way of playing this game. It's simple.

It works a bit like forassasins - it's played over the entire forum, with players looking for grammatical mistakes in posts anywhere on the forums. This should be a lot more interesting.

So, if you're up for this, post below saying that you're in. Make a note of everyone else who is in. Then, if you see a post anywhere in the forum by another player which contains a grammatical mistake/inaccuracy or spelling mistake (we won't include typos, since that will just make the whole thing too difficult to do), post in this forum saying "XYZ made ABC mistake in 123 thread at (alpha)(beta)(gamma) time". The points systems work as follows:

Basically, you gain a point for every mistake noted, and you lose a point for every mistake you make which is noticed.

Well, that seems simple enough.

You can only correct people for posts they make after they say they're playing the game - if you go searching through archives, I'm sure you can find all sorts of things, but that's just unsporting.

Also, try not to be too pedantic - making reference to capitalisation of the first letter of a sentence is find, but things like "Shouldn't end a sentence with a preposition" are going to really piss people off over time. It should basically be something that you'd notice without having to go over every sentence carefully.

OK, Well, I'm playing. Every post I make timestamped after this one is game for corrections.

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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby jakeyizle » Tue May 27, 2008 1:13 am UTC

I'm in.
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby The Hyphenator » Wed May 28, 2008 1:56 am UTC

I guess my post was just too amazing to correct, eh? :)

Anyway, I'm in, but I don't think it will go far.
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Re: Grammar Nazism

Postby Freddino18 » Sat Jul 07, 2018 9:30 am UTC

This is a post. This post was made to make this topic appear at the top of the first page of topics. This post does not give the poster any points. This kind of post is more commonly referred to as a "necro", as in "necromancy", because it "revives" a "dead" topic.


Last bumped by Freddino18 on Sat Jul 07, 2018 9:30 am UTC.
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