Attack and Defend

For all your silly time-killing forum games.

Moderators: jestingrabbit, Moderators General, Prelates

Ralith The Third
Don't Ask About His Nephews
Posts: 782
Joined: Sun Jan 25, 2009 5:21 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Ralith The Third » Thu Mar 19, 2009 12:13 am UTC

*falls into a comatose state. Forever. That's horrible, man. Horrible*

I telepathically implant that into NP's head.
Omni.

User avatar
Vieto
Posts: 1558
Joined: Sun Jun 22, 2008 10:44 pm UTC
Location: Canada

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Vieto » Thu Mar 19, 2009 12:25 am UTC

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

I decide to Be Amazing!

User avatar
Box Boy
WINNING
Posts: 1356
Joined: Thu Nov 20, 2008 9:33 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Box Boy » Sat Mar 28, 2009 7:20 pm UTC

I counter with an EMP bomb.

I smash the NP with a hammer.
Signatures are for chumps.

Nunkey
Posts: 24
Joined: Thu Mar 26, 2009 8:25 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Nunkey » Tue Mar 31, 2009 11:34 am UTC

I counter with a bomb-pumped laser (fusion bomb in a heavily mag-shielded containment field which has only one hole). From a few thousand miles away.

I annoy the NP to death by forgetting to post an attack.

TZer0
Posts: 16
Joined: Fri Nov 07, 2008 11:52 am UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby TZer0 » Tue Mar 31, 2009 11:49 am UTC

hallucinates an attack and dodges it.

Equips Fisto! and punches NP.

User avatar
TheManInTheHat
Posts: 49
Joined: Sun Feb 01, 2009 9:32 pm UTC
Location: The Inter-Blag

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby TheManInTheHat » Tue Mar 31, 2009 9:24 pm UTC

I swiftly deflect your punch and kick NP in the groin, yelling "Captain Planet!!"
*Bonus points if you get the reference*
enigmad555 wrote:10/9 the man in hat is amazingly epic

User avatar
Subliminity
needs friends
Posts: 260
Joined: Wed Apr 01, 2009 1:29 am UTC
Location: Yucaipa, California
Contact:

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Subliminity » Wed Apr 01, 2009 4:14 am UTC

Blocks with my groin's giant power of HEART and pokes the np in the eyes, opposite-Jackie-Chan-style.

User avatar
Box Boy
WINNING
Posts: 1356
Joined: Thu Nov 20, 2008 9:33 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Box Boy » Wed Apr 01, 2009 2:20 pm UTC

I'm four feet taller than the average human while your a midget. In other words, you can't reach.

I spit on the NP.
Signatures are for chumps.

User avatar
TheManInTheHat
Posts: 49
Joined: Sun Feb 01, 2009 9:32 pm UTC
Location: The Inter-Blag

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby TheManInTheHat » Wed Apr 01, 2009 7:36 pm UTC

MarshyMarsh wrote:
TheManInTheHat wrote:
TheManInTheHat wrote:
TheManInTheHat wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
MarshyMarsh wrote:
DeLink wrote:
Box Boy wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
thecamoninja wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Arradim wrote:
Box Boy wrote:Spit misses and hit NP
enigmad555 wrote:10/9 the man in hat is amazingly epic

Ralith The Third
Don't Ask About His Nephews
Posts: 782
Joined: Sun Jan 25, 2009 5:21 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Ralith The Third » Sun Apr 05, 2009 2:51 pm UTC

The spit enters a quantum field and drops onto NP head instead of mine.
Omni.

User avatar
DeLink
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 10:44 pm UTC
Location: Galactic Castle

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby DeLink » Mon Apr 06, 2009 6:21 pm UTC

I reflect the spit with a helmet smash of such great force, it travels back in time and cause Ralith to Asplode.


I knock NP down and proceed to give a shotgun blast, and a kick in the ass, and tell them to take their medicine. (Bonus if you know the reference)
As a famous researcher once said" F*** your theory"

"Rock is Overpowered, Paper is fine." - Scissors

"So listen up boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing that happens to you today"- Spy

Ralith The Third
Don't Ask About His Nephews
Posts: 782
Joined: Sun Jan 25, 2009 5:21 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Ralith The Third » Wed Apr 08, 2009 1:20 am UTC

The shotgun misfires, when you try to kick me I do a judo throw on you, and your spine is broken, so you can't speak.

I shoot NP with a triple-drive bomb-pumped laser missile.
Omni.

User avatar
Awesomeness
Posts: 37
Joined: Mon Apr 06, 2009 3:01 pm UTC
Location: The Fiery Depths of Hell!

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Awesomeness » Wed Apr 08, 2009 5:49 am UTC

Ralith The Third wrote:The shotgun misfires, when you try to kick me I do a judo throw on you, and your spine is broken, so you can't speak.

I shoot NP with a triple-drive bomb-pumped laser missile.


I use the matrix to bend the space and time between me and the missile. The lazer guidence system goes crazy and blows up soviet russia (yay)

I then hire an ancient middle eastern hassassin to kill the NP with a hidden dagger.
Image
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up their location.

User avatar
5ynic
Posts: 2
Joined: Wed Apr 08, 2009 7:27 am UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby 5ynic » Wed Apr 08, 2009 7:44 am UTC

I turn the middle Eastern assassin against you by offering twice as much hashish as you paid them.
I then inform the Eschaton that NP is trying to go back in spacetime to prevent it from immanentizing.

User avatar
Crog
Posts: 0
Joined: Mon Apr 06, 2009 5:41 pm UTC
Location: Wisconsin

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Crog » Wed Apr 08, 2009 12:51 pm UTC

But it's too late, because I did go back in space-time and choke the unknowing assassin to death, and while I am here I might as well.....

Choke the NP to death beore he/she knows what's up.

User avatar
DeLink
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 10:44 pm UTC
Location: Galactic Castle

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby DeLink » Wed Apr 08, 2009 3:21 pm UTC

You accidently choke a DeLink life-sized plushy.

I use Crog as shotgun ammo and shoot him at NP.
As a famous researcher once said" F*** your theory"

"Rock is Overpowered, Paper is fine." - Scissors

"So listen up boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing that happens to you today"- Spy

Ralith The Third
Don't Ask About His Nephews
Posts: 782
Joined: Sun Jan 25, 2009 5:21 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Ralith The Third » Wed Apr 08, 2009 8:15 pm UTC

He's a troll. He's got a rather low terminal velocity. Yeah, it bruises, but it's not very deadly.

I concentrate a beam of pure willpower upon NP.
Omni.

User avatar
Box Boy
WINNING
Posts: 1356
Joined: Thu Nov 20, 2008 9:33 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Box Boy » Wed Apr 08, 2009 9:36 pm UTC

TheManInTheHat wrote:
MarshyMarsh wrote:
TheManInTheHat wrote:
TheManInTheHat wrote:
TheManInTheHat wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
MarshyMarsh wrote:
DeLink wrote:
Box Boy wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
thecamoninja wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Bartimaeus wrote:
Ralith The Third wrote:
Arradim wrote:
Box Boy wrote:Willpower misses and hits NP
Signatures are for chumps.

User avatar
DeLink
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 10:44 pm UTC
Location: Galactic Castle

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby DeLink » Wed Apr 08, 2009 10:19 pm UTC

Your puny willpower is no match for my misguided philosophy.

I hack the NP's computer and make it spam random meme's every 4 seconds.
As a famous researcher once said" F*** your theory"

"Rock is Overpowered, Paper is fine." - Scissors

"So listen up boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing that happens to you today"- Spy

User avatar
Box Boy
WINNING
Posts: 1356
Joined: Thu Nov 20, 2008 9:33 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Box Boy » Thu Apr 09, 2009 8:00 am UTC

I spam you with a meme every five seconds.

I'MA FIRIN MAH LAZER!!!!!
Signatures are for chumps.

User avatar
Sp00n
Posts: 148
Joined: Fri Apr 03, 2009 6:32 am UTC
Location: Sydney

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Sp00n » Thu Apr 09, 2009 9:15 am UTC

I inherit all of creation and wipe you and your 'LAZER' clean from the entirety of reality.

I also remove you from existence.
"Did she kiss as good as me?"

"As well as you.
"

User avatar
DeLink
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 10:44 pm UTC
Location: Galactic Castle

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby DeLink » Fri Apr 10, 2009 2:59 pm UTC

You cannot remove me from exsistance, I AM EXSISTANCE


I delay all the updates of whatever the NP has for a hobby, by 9123 years.
As a famous researcher once said" F*** your theory"

"Rock is Overpowered, Paper is fine." - Scissors

"So listen up boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing that happens to you today"- Spy

User avatar
rath358
The bone of my bone
Posts: 945
Joined: Wed Jan 14, 2009 6:02 am UTC
Location: west Camberville

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby rath358 » Fri Apr 10, 2009 6:56 pm UTC

congratulations, you killed xkcd.
i advance time 9123 years

i hit NP on head with chalkboard

User avatar
Actaeus
Posts: 606
Joined: Thu Jan 10, 2008 9:21 pm UTC
Location: ZZ9 Plural Z Alpha

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Actaeus » Fri Apr 10, 2009 8:25 pm UTC

I am Chalk Man, capable of withstanding any chalkboard! I scribble on it with my head.

I force NP to watch Expelled

User avatar
TheManInTheHat
Posts: 49
Joined: Sun Feb 01, 2009 9:32 pm UTC
Location: The Inter-Blag

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby TheManInTheHat » Sat Apr 11, 2009 2:46 am UTC

....that's just stupid....

I mis-lable np as "child porn" and np gets attacked by mobs creepers.
enigmad555 wrote:10/9 the man in hat is amazingly epic

User avatar
DeLink
Posts: 12
Joined: Thu Jan 01, 2009 10:44 pm UTC
Location: Galactic Castle

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby DeLink » Sun Apr 12, 2009 5:52 pm UTC

I run to the police station, stealthly stick it onto a police man, and make a break for it.

I substite a garden hose for a garrote and choke the NP.
As a famous researcher once said" F*** your theory"

"Rock is Overpowered, Paper is fine." - Scissors

"So listen up boy, or pornography starring your mother will be the second worst thing that happens to you today"- Spy

User avatar
Awesomeness
Posts: 37
Joined: Mon Apr 06, 2009 3:01 pm UTC
Location: The Fiery Depths of Hell!

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Awesomeness » Mon Apr 13, 2009 9:51 am UTC

I use my mad-ass-ninja-skills to snap the garden hose with my powerful neck muscles.

I send a mad-ass-ninja-skilled punch at the NP using my powerful (and accurate) neck muscles
Image
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up their location.

User avatar
Impulse97
Posts: 225
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 3:53 am UTC
Location: Near Chicago in the U.S.
Contact:

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Impulse97 » Mon Apr 13, 2009 7:25 pm UTC

Uses a M-60 to cut down the ninja mid attack.

I use a M-60 to rain lead from a hill onto the next poster.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:Dude, everyone likes girls. Have you seen girls? Girls are hot!

The preceding sentence was made with good faith and good humor...


Image

User avatar
Scelestus
Posts: 4
Joined: Mon Apr 13, 2009 7:57 pm UTC
Location: Under my hat and behind my monocle.

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Scelestus » Mon Apr 13, 2009 8:03 pm UTC

I whip off my sunglasses and glare at the bullets. They fall to the ground in shame.

Then I glare relentlessly at the next poster.

User avatar
Dobblesworth
Dobblesworth, here's the title you requested over three years ago. -Banana
Posts: 1429
Joined: Wed May 30, 2007 12:06 pm UTC
Contact:

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Dobblesworth » Mon Apr 13, 2009 11:53 pm UTC

As I am looking in a completely different direction, I am unaffected.

Ripping out the avalanche rescue beacon embedded in his/her ski jacket, I shove NP down a ski-slope. I then start an avalanche uphill to crush the foe.

User avatar
Millumi
Posts: 39
Joined: Wed Dec 17, 2008 11:45 pm UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Millumi » Tue Apr 14, 2009 1:13 am UTC

WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!*goes fast enough to get away from the avalanche with rocket skis*

*goes down the slope right into NP*
Omnia vincit veritas.

User avatar
Awesomeness
Posts: 37
Joined: Mon Apr 06, 2009 3:01 pm UTC
Location: The Fiery Depths of Hell!

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Awesomeness » Tue Apr 14, 2009 7:15 am UTC

I use" my" jet pack to jump/fly over the previous poster, escaping from the avalanche.
Aliens attack in search of the jet pack which I had previously "acquired" from them. I give the jet pack to the NP, who is on a sinking boat, and tell him it's a floatation device. Too bad for NP, the jet pack is now wet ( therefore does not work :twisted: ) and the aliens are just meters away.
Image
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up their location.

AntonGarou
Posts: 121
Joined: Mon Aug 18, 2008 11:17 am UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby AntonGarou » Mon Apr 20, 2009 5:32 am UTC

The aliens saw you give me the jet pack, and I speak their language so they continue chasing you after rescuing me.

They don't care much for random people so when they land to let me off the spaceship they accidentaly land on NP.
I'm not nitpicking, I'm quarkpicking!

User avatar
Vieto
Posts: 1558
Joined: Sun Jun 22, 2008 10:44 pm UTC
Location: Canada

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Vieto » Mon Apr 20, 2009 11:59 am UTC

landing on someone carrying a laser cannon is a difficult thing to do,especially when np, the pilot, gets lazered!

User avatar
Bartimaeus
Posts: 111
Joined: Tue Oct 14, 2008 3:35 pm UTC
Location: Somewhere near NYC, but nobody's heard of

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Bartimaeus » Mon Apr 20, 2009 11:33 pm UTC

luckily I don't get lazered, so the ship land on you and NP

User avatar
Awesomeness
Posts: 37
Joined: Mon Apr 06, 2009 3:01 pm UTC
Location: The Fiery Depths of Hell!

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Awesomeness » Wed Apr 22, 2009 11:00 am UTC

With my superhuman strength, I lift the space ship up and discus it towards NP (I also duct tape a nuke to it)
Image
Jack Bauer once forgot where he put his keys. He then spent the next half-hour torturing himself until he gave up their location.

User avatar
Bartimaeus
Posts: 111
Joined: Tue Oct 14, 2008 3:35 pm UTC
Location: Somewhere near NYC, but nobody's heard of

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Bartimaeus » Wed Apr 22, 2009 10:52 pm UTC

Awesomeness wrote:With my superhuman strength, I lift the space ship up and discus it towards NP (I also duct tape a nuke to it)

User avatar
Happyhovercraft
Posts: 30
Joined: Wed Jun 11, 2008 8:45 am UTC

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Happyhovercraft » Sat Apr 25, 2009 3:58 pm UTC

Take a step to the left and let it fly past me... gracefully

cast flirtatious glance towards NP and smile as charmingly as I can

MuffledScreams
Posts: 69
Joined: Sun Apr 19, 2009 11:13 am UTC
Location: Rhode Island

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby MuffledScreams » Sun Apr 26, 2009 12:22 am UTC

Smile back and wink.

Pull the switch for the trap door.

User avatar
Vieto
Posts: 1558
Joined: Sun Jun 22, 2008 10:44 pm UTC
Location: Canada

Re: Attack and Defend

Postby Vieto » Sun Apr 26, 2009 3:58 am UTC

Of course, the switch breaks.

I take away chromosome 6 from np. Not sure what happens.


Return to “Forum Games”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 32 guests