Corrupt-a-wish

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aurumelectrum13
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby aurumelectrum13 » Wed Aug 05, 2009 7:06 pm UTC

Whoops! I got you a taco.

I wish that there was a thriving human colony on Mars.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Jedifreak » Wed Aug 05, 2009 8:36 pm UTC

Granted, but Quade failed, and mars is destroyed instead of receiving an Atmosphere.

I wish it was dinnertime.
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Mr. N
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Mr. N » Wed Aug 05, 2009 9:31 pm UTC

Granted. But yep, meat loaf. Tofu meat loaf.

I wish they'd stop remaking old movies/cartoons/comics/classics/video games. Except Final Fantasy 7. I wish they'd remake that. Yes I want two wishes.
Your momma eats Pop Tarts!

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Vohu Manah » Wed Aug 05, 2009 9:53 pm UTC

Two wishes! Both of your wishes are denied. You punishment forces you to have a commute of 2 hours every day in heavy traffic, while driving this car.

I wish for everyone in the world to start dancing.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Max2009 » Wed Aug 05, 2009 10:14 pm UTC

I would LOVE to get that car. I go to a HUGE campus, and it takes me 20 minutes to get from class to class.

Anyway, your wish is granted. Unfortunately, nobody was told to stop. It takes a couple of weeks, but eventually everybody dies of massive heart attacks.

I wish for a good night's sleep.
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Mr. N
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Mr. N » Wed Aug 05, 2009 10:42 pm UTC

Granted! But you have to sleep standing. In the morning your feet will be swollen to the point you can't stuff them into your shoes. You will be forced to walk barefoot for 5 miles to school/work. Your grandfather will happily point out that he did this every day 80 years ago.

I wish Fedor would sign with the UFC.
Your momma eats Pop Tarts!

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby RedBandit » Thu Aug 06, 2009 12:06 am UTC

Denied. In a strange twist of fate no one could have predicted, Fedor has decided he really enjoys opera. He starts his tour in 3 months, and it will not end with a knockout.

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aurumelectrum13
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby aurumelectrum13 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 1:12 am UTC

Granted, so long as the only things you concieve are babies!

I wish for a bag of marshmallows.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby RedBandit » Thu Aug 06, 2009 2:20 am UTC

Granted! A four ton bag of marshmallows suddenly appears about 3 feet/1 yard/1 meter above your head. You have about 1 second. I'm not sure if it'll hurt, but my guess is you're dead.

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Mr. N
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Mr. N » Thu Aug 06, 2009 3:27 am UTC

No, everybody knows 4 tons of marshmallows are lighter than 4 tons of bricks.

Granted. Now you'll only hear one voice. Gilbert Gottfried.

I wish Il Divo would sign with the UFC.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Raptor Jesus » Thu Aug 06, 2009 3:28 am UTC

Granted, he does but dies seconds later.

I wish my meme was more popular.
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aurumelectrum13
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby aurumelectrum13 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 4:11 am UTC

Granted! It becomes so popular, it goes main stream, and then it is no longer cool to use.

I wish for a regulation size bag of marshmallows. :?

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Jedifreak » Thu Aug 06, 2009 5:09 am UTC

Granted, but they're stale.

I wish the soundtrack for Watchmen was better.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Roĝer » Thu Aug 06, 2009 3:07 pm UTC

Granted, but it's so cool that it's outlawed on penalty of death.

I wish for this post not to be replied to.
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Mr. N
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Mr. N » Thu Aug 06, 2009 3:20 pm UTC

I wish for a trillion pesos.
Your momma eats Pop Tarts!

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Vincent91 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 3:45 pm UTC

Granted. A trillion pesos are dropped in coins at your front door. The exchange rates for the pesos become so bad that noone accepts them anymore.

I wish for time to fast-forward to the end of August so that school starts faster and I get out of this job.

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aurumelectrum13
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby aurumelectrum13 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 5:36 pm UTC

Granted, except that by fast-forwarding time, you create a hitherto unobserved and untheorized black hole in time, destroying both the past and future by sucking them both to the present.

I wish my leg, while remaining attached and in generally good condition, would stop aching.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Vincent91 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 5:45 pm UTC

Granted. Your other leg is aching now.

I wish I had an idea for a useful application I could develop.

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aurumelectrum13
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby aurumelectrum13 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 5:50 pm UTC

Gratnted. Too bad that it's already been done.

I wish thatmy battery life didn't suck. :cry:

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Jedifreak » Thu Aug 06, 2009 6:36 pm UTC

Granted, but power surges plague your electronics and they're all destroyed.

I wish I could go to bed at a decent hour.
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aurumelectrum13
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby aurumelectrum13 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 9:57 pm UTC

Granted! Of course, you won't live to see the dawn...

I wish for a five degree drop in temperature.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Max2009 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 10:38 pm UTC

Granted. Now close the fridge.

I wish for something yummy to eat.
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Mr. N
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Mr. N » Thu Aug 06, 2009 11:16 pm UTC

Granted. Now close the fridge.

I wish for steak flavored gum.
Your momma eats Pop Tarts!

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e^iπ+1=0
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby e^iπ+1=0 » Thu Aug 06, 2009 11:38 pm UTC

Granted. Now close the fridge.

I wish I was a cat.
poxic wrote:You, sir, have heroic hair.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby 666alphaomega666 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 1:12 am UTC

Granted. You don't know how to close fridges.

I wish my mp3 player had more memory.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby RedBandit » Fri Aug 07, 2009 2:33 am UTC

Why so many identical corruptions?

Max2009:
Granted! The best doughnut you've ever had in your life appears in your lap. Unfortunately, it was poisoned. You have about 30 minutes to live.

Mr. N:
Granted! Unfortunately, steak-flavored gum is now the only food you can digest. You only have one pack, and no one else will sell you another. You have about 2 weeks, at best, to live.

e^iπ+1=0:
Denied! Instead, you are now the cutest pussy in the world. You're attached to Raven Riley, and play a critical role in most of her films. Unfortunately, pussies don't have brains, so it's hard to tell if you'll really enjoy the many, many, many experiences you'll be having.

666alphaomega666:
Granted! Your mp3 player now has a 20 TB solid state HDD. Unfortunately, you will never find batteries for it ever again. Plugging it into the wall does work, but you can never sync it properly with your computer. Trying to sync it with someone else's machine results in a spectacular electrical fire, killing you, your friends, your family, and everyone you hold dear.

I wish aurumelectrum13 would close the damned fridge, and that so many people would never copy-pasta wish-corruptions again. And yes, I did have two wishes, but I corrupted 3, so maybe the fora owes me one. LoL
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby e^iπ+1=0 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 2:38 am UTC

Granted. Now close the fridge.

I wish for nothing.
poxic wrote:You, sir, have heroic hair.
poxic wrote:I note that the hair is not slowing down. It appears to have progressed from heroic to rocking.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby RedBandit » Fri Aug 07, 2009 2:47 am UTC

Granted! Without warning, all of your clothes disappear in a flash of light! Trying to run back home, you get arrested. Without your identification, the police are forced to clothe you and keep you in jail overnight. The next day, you are tried for public indecency. You are fined $500 (or the equivalent in local currency). Getting home, in your bright orange jumpsuit, without any money, is quite a challenge. It is ultimately astoundingly frustrating, particularly when you get to where your home should be, and instead there is a gigantic hole in the ground! All of your worldly possessions are gone. Your friends have all disappeared. Your family has disowned you because of your arrest, and your parents (if applicable) will never speak to you again. You get fired because of your arrest. You are now alone, penniless, and without any means of supporting or feeding yourself. You die alone, 2 weeks later, still wearing your orange jumpsuit from jail. You truly had nothing.

I wish for true love.
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Mr. N
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Mr. N » Fri Aug 07, 2009 2:52 am UTC

Granted. She/He is as long-winded as you are.

I wish for the fridge door to return.
Your momma eats Pop Tarts!

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby RedBandit » Fri Aug 07, 2009 2:57 am UTC

Granted. It kills you.

I wish my humor was appreciated.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby knight427 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 4:39 am UTC

Granted, your diary is published on the internet, spread by a computer virus and the whole world laughs at you.

I wish I was doing something more productive than corrupting your wish.
knight427

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If you TEACH a zombie to fish, he will be munching on you for hours.

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Jedifreak
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Jedifreak » Fri Aug 07, 2009 6:12 am UTC

Granted. You are plotting the assassination of the President of Cuba.

I wish the world operated on a 28 hour day, and the four hours we gain are for our own use.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Max2009 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 8:09 am UTC

Granted. But the worldwide wildlife cannot adopt properly. Carnivorous animals go crazy and start attacking the cities. Formerly peaceful animals that were pets now turn on their owners and disembowel them. The insect population goes nuts. Every available surface is covered in hundreds of bugs fighting their last desperate battle. Pretty soon the plant life dries up and dies too. Oxygen leaks out of the atmosphere. More and more greenhouse gases are trapped in the rapidly thickening air. Within 2 years the Earth is as uninhabitable as Titan.

Max2009 wrote:Granted. Now close the fridge.

I wish for something yummy to eat.

Mr. N wrote:Granted. Now close the fridge.

I wish for steak flavored gum.
e^iπ+1=0 wrote:Granted. Now close the fridge.

I wish I was a cat.
666alphaomega666 wrote:Granted. You don't know how to close fridges.

I wish my mp3 player had more memory.
RedBandit wrote:Why so many identical corruptions?


I wish aurumelectrum13 would close the damned fridge, and that so many people would never copy-pasta wish-corruptions again. And yes, I did have two wishes, but I corrupted 3, so maybe the fora owes me one. ¡This cheese is burning me!
e^iπ+1=0 wrote:Granted. Now close the fridge.

I wish for nothing.
Mr. N wrote:Granted. She/He is as long-winded as you are.

I wish for the fridge door to return.


I wish this will become a new meme.
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Vincent91
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Vincent91 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 3:09 pm UTC

Granted, but the scope of the meme is limited to this thread.

I wish I had Chinese food.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Max2009 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 4:05 pm UTC

Granted, but you suffer major migraines from the MSG.

I wish The Fridge will be a meme that encompasses the entire internet.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby knight427 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 4:50 pm UTC

Granted, everything on the internet is replaced by a text-only biography of William Perry.

I wish my calculator had a “Teach this class for me today” button.
knight427



If you GIVE a zombie a fish, you will feed him for minute.

If you TEACH a zombie to fish, he will be munching on you for hours.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Vincent91 » Fri Aug 07, 2009 5:00 pm UTC

Granted. Your calculator has a button labeled "Teach this class for me today", but it does nothing.

I wish for the post after this one to be written in Klingon.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Josephine » Fri Aug 07, 2009 5:36 pm UTC

nobpu' jIH ghaj Daq


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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Jedifreak » Sat Aug 08, 2009 3:09 am UTC

Granted. The language is silence.

I wish the gorram hippies would shut up about Nuclear Power Plants.
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aurumelectrum13
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby aurumelectrum13 » Sat Aug 08, 2009 3:39 am UTC

Granted! Now the Nuclear Power Plant employees are complaining.

Spoiler:
I'm going to take this spoiler and relish for a moment; I sparked a meme! Woo! :D


I wish for world peas.


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