Corrupt-a-wish

For all your silly time-killing forum games.

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madjo
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby madjo » Mon Jan 16, 2012 1:24 pm UTC

Granted, you are now deaf.

I wish I knew what car to get.
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

Doodletigress
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Doodletigress » Mon Jan 16, 2012 8:10 pm UTC

You decide to get a Fiat 750. Unfortunately, they haven't been invented yet, and there are a lot of time machines to pick from.

I wish fiction could be real.

adfes
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby adfes » Tue Jan 17, 2012 3:49 pm UTC

Granted, but we are in "space-war" against : Aliens, Predators, Empire, Cylons. On the other side cancer is cured but everyone turned out zombies in London.

I wish E.T. still on Earth looking for his/her family.

Fire Brns
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Wed Jan 18, 2012 1:52 am UTC

Government finally finds and kills him.

First wish is a real one next one will be more fun:
I wish I understood sexual attraction(I am asexual)
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

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farnsworth
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby farnsworth » Wed Jan 18, 2012 6:07 am UTC

Granted. You understand sexual attraction, but want nothing to do with it.

I wish for a hot-air balloon.

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madjo
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby madjo » Wed Jan 18, 2012 2:41 pm UTC

granted, but you forgot to get in the wooden basket and the balloon starts floating away.

I wish to lose 10 kilograms of bodyfat from my body.
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

Fire Brns
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Joined: Thu Oct 20, 2011 2:25 pm UTC

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Wed Jan 18, 2012 5:32 pm UTC

Granted, The wish system does not understand metric, attempts to fix error, you lose 1000 pounds.

I wish there was no disease.
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

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CorruptUser
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby CorruptUser » Wed Jan 18, 2012 10:06 pm UTC

Granted, a massive solar flare eradicates all diseases and their hosts.

I wish to have my very own orbital weapons platform.

Fire Brns
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Wed Jan 18, 2012 10:58 pm UTC

Tough...

Granted. It violates the treaty (along the lines of the Treaty of Versailles) that the Egyptians signed in 2300 BC promting an invasion of Earth.

I wish for a good Bioshock sequel.
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

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CorruptUser
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby CorruptUser » Thu Jan 19, 2012 2:13 am UTC

Granted, but it causes the Cato institute to expand, you monster.

I wish for my orbital weapons platform to defeat the alien invasion.

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Bartimaeus
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Bartimaeus » Thu Jan 19, 2012 3:06 am UTC

The invasion is defeated, but you are killed in the fighting.

I wish that my coffee was not poisoned.

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Millumi
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Millumi » Thu Jan 19, 2012 3:45 am UTC

Granted, you drink your non-poisoned coffee and throw it up, finding that there was a centipede in it.

I wish my wish was a paradox.
Omnia vincit veritas.

Fire Brns
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Thu Jan 19, 2012 4:17 am UTC

Granted but as it cannot be proven a paradox, devolves in an existential question.

I wish that wishes ceased to exist after this wish.
Last edited by Fire Brns on Thu Jan 19, 2012 3:29 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Thu Jan 19, 2012 6:25 am UTC

Granted. We are now busy wishing in the realm of non-existence.

I wish I knew how to get back home.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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madjo
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby madjo » Thu Jan 19, 2012 10:32 am UTC

Granted, now you know how to get home, but don't want to go there.

I wish it was raining fish, instead of this raining cats and dogs thing. The barking and meowing/hissing is making me go nuts!
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

shirosuzume
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby shirosuzume » Thu Jan 19, 2012 3:03 pm UTC

Granted. After 40 days and 40 nights, the fish are quite happy in the newfound sea, but you, on the other hand, are stuck on a 6' x 6' raft, and you don't appear to be growing gills.

I wish that I had a plane and could fly everywhere.

Fire Brns
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Thu Jan 19, 2012 3:28 pm UTC

Granted, your plane is for show purposes only and your arms get tired trying to generate lift.

I wish for a number 2 pencil.
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Fri Jan 20, 2012 8:00 am UTC

Granted, but due to trademark issues, you can't write in public with anything except for generic sticks of graphite.

I wish I could understand the proof of Fermet's last theorem.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

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madjo
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby madjo » Fri Jan 20, 2012 1:35 pm UTC

granted, but because it uses so many braincells, you lost the ability to speak and write.

I wish I had a thought-to-text capability with my phone to replace the keyboard, but only text that I want to appear on the phone.
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

Fire Brns
Posts: 1114
Joined: Thu Oct 20, 2011 2:25 pm UTC

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Fri Jan 20, 2012 3:22 pm UTC

Granted, you get so focused on texting that you walk into heavy traffic.

I wish for 10 terrabytes of storage space for all my video games.
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

Randomizer
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Randomizer » Fri Jan 20, 2012 5:24 pm UTC

Granted, but you pay 1996 prices for it.

I wish I knew which digital camera to buy.
Belial wrote:I'm all outraged out. Call me when the violent rebellion starts.

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CorruptUser
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby CorruptUser » Sat Jan 21, 2012 12:01 am UTC

Granted, but it's sold out.

I wish for a fresh heart.

someguy12345
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby someguy12345 » Sat Jan 21, 2012 10:58 pm UTC

Granted. Your mother's heart has now been torn out and placed in front of you.

I wish that humanity was gone.

Randomizer
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Randomizer » Sun Jan 22, 2012 12:40 am UTC

Denied. That which never existed can never be destroyed.

I wish for increased talent, ability, ease, and speed in creating artwork.
Belial wrote:I'm all outraged out. Call me when the violent rebellion starts.

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CorruptUser
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby CorruptUser » Sun Jan 22, 2012 3:07 am UTC

Granted, but it's only artwork that's too "profound", whatever the hell that means, for anyone else to "get".

I wish I didn't eat those cookies.

Fire Brns
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Mon Jan 23, 2012 2:55 am UTC

Fire Brns wrote:I wish for 10 terrabytes of storage space for all my video games.
Randomizer wrote:Granted, but you pay 1996 prices for it.
I would have the storage space by wishing; buying it would defeat the purpose of wishing.
someguy12345 wrote:I wish that humanity was gone.
Randomizer wrote:Denied. That which never existed can never be destroyed.
It would simply "stop existing", not "never have existed".

Granted, you get stuck in a paradox.
1)You never ate those cookies.
2)You never wished to not eat your wishes.
3)You ate the cookies.
4)You wished you never ate the cookies.
5)Go to step one.

I wish for a perfectly unbeatable immune system that is not manmade.
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

Randomizer
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Randomizer » Mon Jan 23, 2012 3:19 am UTC

By causing you to pay more than you would have if you had never wished at all, I corrupted your wish. Corrupting wishes is the purpose of this thread. If you want a benevolent genie, you must look elsewhere.

I denied someguy12345's wish. Because humanity (the quality or state of being humane. Humane: marked by compassion, sympathy, or consideration for humans or animals) doesn't exist. Therefore I can not make it gone. :p
-----
Granted. A hyper-intelligent robot with a perfectly unbeatable immune system is created in a laboratory in Russia, which then proceeds to pull a komodo dragon and rampages across the Earth spreading lethal diseases in order to harvest our dead bodies for fuel. Since this was your idea, an angry mob forms to hunt you down and put your head on a pike.

I wish Fire Burns wouldn't criticize the way in which I corrupt wishes.
Belial wrote:I'm all outraged out. Call me when the violent rebellion starts.

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madjo
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby madjo » Mon Jan 23, 2012 10:28 am UTC

granted, but he criticizes everything else that you do, including the way you use the toilet.

I wish people wouldn't ask me any stupid questions.
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

Fire Brns
Posts: 1114
Joined: Thu Oct 20, 2011 2:25 pm UTC

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Mon Jan 23, 2012 2:37 pm UTC

You spelled my name wrong and I said not manmade. I wished for the storage space as in possession, it exists, I didn't wish that it existed. You could have easily said the game industry makes games more memory intensive and defeats the purpose or a solar flare destroys all our electronics afterwards. People way back were saying that 1 gig was all the memory you would ever need, lol. I just found your answer lazy. Like this:

Granted, you are never asked a question again. You get lonely. (sorry)

I wish the coruption for this wish invlolves tuna.
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

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madjo
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby madjo » Mon Jan 23, 2012 4:06 pm UTC

Granted, but unfortunately, this is all you're going to get.

I wish that Fire brns realized that it's just a game, not something real.
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

Fire Brns
Posts: 1114
Joined: Thu Oct 20, 2011 2:25 pm UTC

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Mon Jan 23, 2012 7:24 pm UTC

Denied, he already knows. (A game can be made not fun if all the players get lazy)
Lol with the tuna.

I wish for a ham and cheese sandwich.
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

someguy12345
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby someguy12345 » Wed Jan 25, 2012 1:56 am UTC

Granted. It is a gourmet ham and cheese sandwich with the best ham and cheese one could possibly acquire, and it has been heated to absolute perfection. Too bad you didn't wish for a plate on which to put this incredibly hot delicacy. Are the burns on your hands worth it?

I wish for a ham and cheese sandwich on a plate.

Randomizer
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Randomizer » Wed Jan 25, 2012 2:27 am UTC

I'm sorry, when I saw the "u" in your name I didn't realize I was imagining it. :p And I didn't say it was a laboratory run by humans.

Granted. A delicious ham and cheese sandwich appears on Jeff Plate's stomach just as he's waking up from a nap. This inspires the new song release "Sandwhich Hands" in which he bangs on your sandwich during a percussion solo. He refuses to let you eat it when he's finished and instead feeds it to his friend Catherine, who later coughs up cheese balls on your shoes.

I wish for the internet to bring forth great justice.
Belial wrote:I'm all outraged out. Call me when the violent rebellion starts.

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madjo
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby madjo » Fri Jan 27, 2012 10:01 am UTC

Granted, it's justice as written by the RIAA and the MPAA.

I wish there was no notion of copyright in the world.
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

Fire Brns
Posts: 1114
Joined: Thu Oct 20, 2011 2:25 pm UTC

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Fire Brns » Fri Jan 27, 2012 4:48 pm UTC

Granted. You have an amazing idea that will make you millions of dollars. 50 people rip it off.

I wish for a pocket sized elephant.
Pfhorrest wrote:As someone who is not easily offended, I don't really mind anything in this conversation.
Mighty Jalapeno wrote:It was the Renaissance. Everyone was Italian.

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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Fri Jan 27, 2012 8:58 pm UTC

Granted, but you now have pockets the size of a giraffe.

I wish for a reduction in the unemployment rate.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
-Dungeon Crawl.

someguy12345
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby someguy12345 » Fri Jan 27, 2012 11:30 pm UTC

Granted. The unemployment rate is now zero. This was achieved when the evil dictator who took over the world decided to make every single person a slave.

I wish I could shoot lightning out of my fingers.

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Chewbaccawacca
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Chewbaccawacca » Sat Jan 28, 2012 3:11 am UTC

Granted. Though you now also have rubber gloves permanently on your hands.



I wish I had a Cray super computer.
Not all who wander ar...blah blah blah, basically I want to be cool like Aragorn.

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madjo
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby madjo » Sun Jan 29, 2012 12:17 pm UTC

granted, it's a cray supercomputer from the 70s.

I wish for a million US Dollars
:)

You are carrying:
- a slightly paranoid Android
- two left feet (not my own)
- a still unfed and very hungry hippo
- broadsword of +5 ridiculousness stained with the blood of the undead souls
- a stetson Resistol, cuz stetson Resistols are cool.

User avatar
Chewbaccawacca
Posts: 141
Joined: Sun Jan 30, 2011 1:14 am UTC
Location: The Great Green Pacific Northwest! ....of the United States! .....of America!

Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Chewbaccawacca » Mon Jan 30, 2012 1:26 am UTC

Granted, you now have a million US dollars in pennies all in a nice, straight, single-file line starting at your front door.



I wish I had a tuna sandwich.
Not all who wander ar...blah blah blah, basically I want to be cool like Aragorn.


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