Corrupt-a-wish

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The Hyphenator
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby The Hyphenator » Sat Jun 28, 2008 12:23 pm UTC

Granted. You're a new one, called Dullness.

I wish people liked mimes more.
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pkuky
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby pkuky » Sat Jun 28, 2008 12:48 pm UTC

granted, but mimes take over the world and start campaining for hayena rights.

I wish hayenas were less silly.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby felltir » Sat Jun 28, 2008 1:58 pm UTC

Granted but now their name is spelt wrong, and they hate it and kill you.

I wish more people liked antelopes.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby falcon434 » Sat Jun 28, 2008 5:44 pm UTC

granted, but as a side effect, people want antelope products, and eventually they go extinct.


i wish for a KFC biscuit, fresh from the oven, nice and clean and warm for me to eat.... yummm.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby pkuky » Sat Jun 28, 2008 7:15 pm UTC

granted, but the toast king gets jealous.

I wish the toast king liked me.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Megatriorchis » Sat Jun 28, 2008 7:25 pm UTC

Granted, but now you have to live on the moon.

I wish my computer had more memory.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Babam » Sat Jun 28, 2008 7:52 pm UTC

Granted, it has so much Memory it brings up your affair in front of your wife.

I wish I had Diablo III
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby falcon434 » Sat Jun 28, 2008 9:07 pm UTC

granted, but only for 5 hours. and installation takes 6 hours!


i wish i got more pms.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby felltir » Sat Jun 28, 2008 9:41 pm UTC

Granted, you have PMS so bad you die.

I wish that wasn't so easy.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Leonsbuddydave » Sat Jun 28, 2008 10:10 pm UTC

Granted, now it's ridiculously difficult and you tear out all your hair and BOSLEY CAN'T HELP YOU.

I wish I could turn on any electrical device like the Fonz turns on jukeboxes.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Ansain » Sat Jun 28, 2008 11:06 pm UTC

granted, but you can no longer turn on females (or males depending on which you prefer. lets just go with both just to be safe)

I wish for a cure to the common cold.
Why put off till today what you could just as easily get done tomorrow?

I can mathematically prove that 1 equals 0!.

Parts a-x in my plan weren't that important anyways.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby abrenecki » Sun Jun 29, 2008 12:38 am UTC

Granted. You contract an uncommon cold and somehow die.

I wish for delicious food.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Leonsbuddydave » Sun Jun 29, 2008 1:04 am UTC

Granted, but you break your jaw running excitedly towards it.

I wish for more smileys.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby abrenecki » Sun Jun 29, 2008 1:11 am UTC

Granted. They eat you.

I wish to instantly be able to type in Dvorak, and touchtype in Qwerty.
Edit: under which will [I also wish for] MacSpeech Dictate to recognize anything perfectly even with music playing in the background.
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The Hyphenator
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby The Hyphenator » Sun Jun 29, 2008 5:29 pm UTC

Granted, but in order for MacSpeech Dictate to be able to do that, it has to become sentient. It takes over the world. You die.

I wish there weren't so many smiling smilies. ( :D :) :lol: :P :wink: )
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Megatriorchis » Sun Jun 29, 2008 5:50 pm UTC

Granted; now they're all sad.

I wish Spain would win today.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Sparv » Sun Jun 29, 2008 5:53 pm UTC

Megatriorchis wrote:I wish Spain would win today.


Granted; tonight a drunk Spaniard will run over you.

I wish oil was cheaper.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Sorroth » Sun Jun 29, 2008 7:39 pm UTC

Granted. Now everyone is burning so much of it that climate change is accelerated. Enjoy your desert!

I wish my weekends were more peaceful.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Azrael001 » Sun Jun 29, 2008 7:49 pm UTC

Granted, you now have the peace of the dead. You die.

I wish I was playing Ninja Gaiden 2 right now instead of two minutes in the future.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby pkuky » Sun Jun 29, 2008 9:15 pm UTC

granted, but as a result you get bored of the game and stop playing it two minutes before youy would otherwise have done.

I wish I'd finished playing diablo 3 rather then stop in the third area.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby abrenecki » Mon Jun 30, 2008 7:37 am UTC

Granted, but in the time this takes you raptors take over the world. You die.

I wish for an Apple Remote that can control anyone or anything, and on which there is an easy way to do everything using only short combinations of the six buttons (without changing the definition of everything) and which will never stop working or get lost.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Ansain » Mon Jun 30, 2008 7:51 am UTC

granted, but the instructions are written in Clingon (sp?) a wrong combination of the 6 buttons initiates self destruct.

I wish for a lava lamp, with real lava.
Why put off till today what you could just as easily get done tomorrow?

I can mathematically prove that 1 equals 0!.

Parts a-x in my plan weren't that important anyways.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Sparv » Mon Jun 30, 2008 7:52 am UTC

abrenecki wrote:I wish for an Apple Remote that can control anyone or anything, and on which there is an easy way to do everything using only short combinations of the six buttons (without changing the definition of everything) and which will never stop working or get lost.


Granted! it's Apple, so the 6000% profit margin make the iRemote cost around 12 000 000€.

EDIT:
I wish for a lava lamp, with real lava.


Granted. Your best friend's three years old daughter plays with it.

I wish I could afford two 30" screens and the computer to handle them.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Zohar » Mon Jun 30, 2008 8:19 am UTC

Granted. But every store is out of stock.

I wish I had twice as much money as the second-richest person is the world.
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Ansain
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Ansain » Mon Jun 30, 2008 8:31 am UTC

granted, but it's all in pennies being dropped from airplanes at 10,000 ft onto your house as we speak.

I wish I had that much money in $100 bills.
Why put off till today what you could just as easily get done tomorrow?

I can mathematically prove that 1 equals 0!.

Parts a-x in my plan weren't that important anyways.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby abrenecki » Mon Jun 30, 2008 8:46 am UTC

Granted. You drown in bills.

I wish I could afford the remote, and read the manual. I also wish I didn't still owe people money for my MacBook. *wants Adobe CS3 apps to run on Linux*

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby pkuky » Mon Jun 30, 2008 3:29 pm UTC

granted, but the day after a world- wide fellowship is induced where people all care for one another and give thigns away for free, making money obsolete.

I wish I could read the book.
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Ansain
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Ansain » Mon Jun 30, 2008 4:23 pm UTC

granted, you could read it if it weren't on fire.

I wish for a toilet made of solid gold
Why put off till today what you could just as easily get done tomorrow?

I can mathematically prove that 1 equals 0!.

Parts a-x in my plan weren't that important anyways.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Megatriorchis » Mon Jun 30, 2008 4:26 pm UTC

Ganted, but now you don't want to use it because it's so expensive.

I wish for an unlimited amount of food.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Ansain » Mon Jun 30, 2008 4:29 pm UTC

granted, but it's fish food.

I wish for a slice of normal apple pie that had not been tampered with in any way.
Why put off till today what you could just as easily get done tomorrow?

I can mathematically prove that 1 equals 0!.

Parts a-x in my plan weren't that important anyways.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Account20151023 » Mon Jun 30, 2008 4:56 pm UTC

Granted, but it's guarded a lockbox in a jail in Somalia.

I wish something good would happen to me.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby pkuky » Mon Jun 30, 2008 5:25 pm UTC

granted, but it keeps on hapening, meaning that it gradually loses it's value and dulls your ability to enjoy it.

I wish my ability to enjoy things wasn't dulled by repeated use.
It rains on the enemy too!

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Sparv » Mon Jun 30, 2008 5:42 pm UTC

pkuky wrote:I wish my ability to enjoy things wasn't dulled by repeated use.


Granted. You get Alzheimer's disease (what was his firstname, BTW?)

I wish I didn't need to sleep.
Shit happens

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Irrefutable » Mon Jun 30, 2008 5:45 pm UTC

Granted, you are abducted for a series of painful and lengthy tests by the government to explain the phenomanon.

I wish i had a sandwich right now
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Account20151023 » Mon Jun 30, 2008 5:55 pm UTC

granted, and it's the best sandwhich you've ever had, but after two bites, a dude runs up and replaces it with warm ejaculate between two pieces of cardboard while you aren't paying attention.

I want gas to be shit-cheap.

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pkuky
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby pkuky » Mon Jun 30, 2008 6:00 pm UTC

granted, but it's because there's too much of it in the world now. you die of gas poisoning.

I wish science didn't mean that not all dreams can some true.
It rains on the enemy too!

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abrenecki
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby abrenecki » Tue Jul 01, 2008 8:33 am UTC

Granted. The dreams of everyone on /b/ come true. Everyone dies.

I wish I knew why people on /b/ are the way they are. I also wish to know this without going on /b/ itself, or ED again.

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The Hyphenator
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby The Hyphenator » Tue Jul 01, 2008 12:29 pm UTC

Granted. You die, obviously.

I wish Anonymous and Scientology both exploded and showered the world in candy.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Irrefutable » Tue Jul 01, 2008 12:30 pm UTC

You die of obesity.

I wish Assassins Creed worked on my computer.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Irrefutable » Tue Jul 01, 2008 12:31 pm UTC

BomanTheBear wrote:granted, and it's the best sandwhich you've ever had, but after two bites, a dude runs up and replaces it with warm ejaculate between two pieces of cardboard while you aren't paying attention.


And i know im abit late and its not strictly relevent but Zero Punctuation! \o/
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