Corrupt-a-wish

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Mon Apr 08, 2019 3:04 am UTC

Granted. You don't wish for it. You get it anyway. It makes you miserable.

I wish my trip were two days earlier, so that I could see that show.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Mon Apr 08, 2019 7:49 pm UTC

Granted. Your trip is two days earlier, and you could see that show... if it weren't canceled.

I wish I had to work half as much and would earn twice as much.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Apr 08, 2019 9:08 pm UTC

granted, your job is to donate to charities and you get twice what you donate.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Tue Apr 09, 2019 3:37 pm UTC

I wish for flight, superhuman strength, and whatever phillip1882 forgot to wish for.
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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Tue Apr 09, 2019 6:20 pm UTC

Granted. The thing phillip1882 forgot to wish for was a horrible death.

I wish for a savory truffle.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Tue Apr 09, 2019 6:33 pm UTC

granted it's so good you get addicted to the taste.

i wish to enjoy my life and not do anything most would consider evil.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby eran_rathan » Fri Apr 12, 2019 6:47 pm UTC

granted, most animals don't consider cannibalism evil, as they lack the moral capacity to consider anything evil.

I wish my job application was approved.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Fri Apr 12, 2019 7:51 pm UTC

granted. its approved but they still want to do an interview.

i wish for the top of my head to have more than enough hair to not be considered bald.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Sun Apr 14, 2019 12:34 pm UTC

Granted. The top of your head is fully covered with thick, luxuriant hair that grows an inch a day.

I wish I had gone to bed earlier last night.
Apart from Forum Games, mostly active on the One True Thread.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Apr 14, 2019 4:00 pm UTC

granted you did you just don't remember it that way.

i wish for a good woman.
good luck have fun

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flicky1991
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby flicky1991 » Sun Apr 14, 2019 4:02 pm UTC

Granted. She's good, but not great.

I wish for a sexy man.
any pronouns
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Apr 14, 2019 11:46 pm UTC

granted hes not that bright, but he looks good.


i wish i win 90% of the time when i gamble.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Mon Apr 15, 2019 3:54 am UTC

Granted. You lose the 10% of the time you gamble big.

I wish the US tax forms were fill-in PDFs that (correctly) autocalculated the appropriate entries.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Apr 15, 2019 11:42 pm UTC

granted there's lots of software that does that, like turbotax.


i wish trump gets re-elected.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Tue Apr 16, 2019 12:09 am UTC

Not granted due to the impossibility of corrupting that wish.

I wish all FPTP voting in the US were instead approval voting.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Tue Apr 16, 2019 3:33 am UTC

granted but takes a while for the government to agree.


i wish any thing i break or harm to be healed and renewed.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Tue Apr 16, 2019 3:50 am UTC

Granted. You are fascinated by the process, and break people's legs just to watch them heal.

I wish I didn't ever have to pay a shipping charge for anything I ordered (and didn't have to pay a subscription fee for that privilege).

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Wed Apr 17, 2019 1:19 am UTC

granted. your free shipping will get reviewed by the police eventually so spend while you can,


i wish to love life,
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby solune » Wed Apr 17, 2019 3:14 pm UTC

granted. You fall in love with Artemis, goddess of life. She doesn't like you.

I wish there was a way for entropy to diminish.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby eran_rathan » Thu Apr 18, 2019 2:49 pm UTC

granted, but its locally, and offset by massively increased entropy 2.1m away.

I wish for less ambiguity.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Apr 22, 2019 9:35 pm UTC

granted, things are better or at least more clearly explained.

i wish for a job i enjoy.
good luck have fun

sttpeok
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby sttpeok » Tue Apr 23, 2019 11:42 am UTC

I wish I could earn 1 million within 2019 ;)
I am not sure it possible or not. But, I have a toilet-related blog. My most popular post is the best one piece toilet https://bestflushingtoilet.org/best-one ... t-reviews/. I am trying hard to increase popularity each page of this website. I don't earn much through this toilet blog. But working hard to increase the visitors. It may take more time but I am not sure how it possible to make millions from a flush toilet website.
Last edited by sttpeok on Sat Jun 15, 2019 12:10 am UTC, edited 2 times in total.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Wed Apr 24, 2019 12:39 am UTC

granted the next lottery ticket you buy wins.

i wish for someone to help me take care of my parents.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby solune » Thu Apr 25, 2019 3:29 pm UTC

phillip1882 wrote:i wish for a job i enjoy.

Granted. You now really enjoy paper pushing and bean counting during the day. At night however you realize how futile or even harmful to the world your work is.

phillip1882 wrote:i wish for someone to help me take care of my parents.

Not granted. I have an idea about how to make it worse but I don't have the heart to say it.

I wish for a gun silencer that actually silences the gun when it shoots.

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Sat Apr 27, 2019 3:34 am UTC

Granted. It does this by reducing the bullet's velocity to one meter per second.

I wish that all my equipment had total immunity from power surges.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Sat Apr 27, 2019 6:42 am UTC

Granted. Your equipment is now totally unaffected by electricity in any way.

I wish I had someone to keep the garden tidy.
Apart from Forum Games, mostly active on the One True Thread.
If you need help understanding what's going on there, the xkcd Time Wiki may be useful.

Addams thanks all of us who helped. Her life is much better now.

Randallspeed to all blitzers on the One True Thread!

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Apr 28, 2019 1:05 am UTC

granted just hire a gardener.


i wish everything works out well.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby solune » Mon Apr 29, 2019 10:03 am UTC

Granted. Instead of a paper clip maximiser, the first AI to be built is a digging machine. It paves the earth (and ultimately the whole universe) with wells.

I wish there was a period of the day when the sun was green.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Apr 29, 2019 9:35 pm UTC

granted, just as the sun is about to set, it looks green for about 45 seconds.

i wish 5 more people would join and play my thumb tacks revenge game.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Tue Apr 30, 2019 4:49 am UTC

Granted. They use real thumb tacks to take revenge on the DM.

I wish eating too much did not affect me.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

solune
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby solune » Tue Apr 30, 2019 8:18 am UTC

Granted, you're now the proud host of a tapeworm !

I wish that the Babel tower story was real (except the part where they stop building)

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Tue Apr 30, 2019 2:28 pm UTC

Granted, but it's not safe for an American there (or for anyone not from that specific part of Iraq).

I wish I could learn languages like Kung-fu is learnt in the Matrix.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Tue Apr 30, 2019 3:33 pm UTC

granted. you'll need a head plug for the needle to go in.

i wish time heals all wounds.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Thu May 02, 2019 5:29 am UTC

Granted. It takes seventy years.

I wish somebody would solve my petty problem.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Thu May 02, 2019 2:48 pm UTC

Granted, you do.

I wish I for a +15 butterknife.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Thu May 02, 2019 3:20 pm UTC

granted you get 15 more butter knifes.

i wish for 100 wishes that aren't corrupted.
good luck have fun

solune
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby solune » Thu May 02, 2019 4:08 pm UTC

Granted :You get 100 uncorrupted wishes, but none of them are granted.

I wish for the problem of vertical videos to be solved.

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svenman
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Thu May 02, 2019 6:54 pm UTC

Granted, the solution is called 'pillarboxing'.

I wish for less insanity and more good sense in politics.
Apart from Forum Games, mostly active on the One True Thread.
If you need help understanding what's going on there, the xkcd Time Wiki may be useful.

Addams thanks all of us who helped. Her life is much better now.

Randallspeed to all blitzers on the One True Thread!

solune
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby solune » Fri May 03, 2019 8:01 am UTC

Granted, politicians are now perfectly rationnal actors. It turns out that the optimal course of action for each of them is to lie, cheat and steal.

I wish for the next spam letter I receive to deliver on its promise.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Fri May 03, 2019 2:45 pm UTC

Granted: If you're a woman, it's penis enlargement pills; if you're a man, its breast enlargement pills.

I wish Craigslist had a section for recipients of corrupted wishes to sell their inappropriate magical stuff.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.


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