Amusing answers to tests

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btilly
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby btilly » Sun Dec 02, 2007 6:59 pm UTC

Torn Apart By Dingos wrote:
btilly wrote:The professor said that I was absolutely right, and in all of the years that he'd been giving the course I was the only person to figure that out. Then he told me where I could find the article giving the difficult counter-example. :D

What is the counter-example? Also, what text did you use?

The book was Foundations of Mathematical Analysis. I never looked up the counter-example, and if I had I'd have forgotten about it by now (this happened 16 years ago). If you enjoy such things, I'd suggest reading Counter-examples in Analysis.

As for the specific question I posed (which may or may not be the one I was asked), this book points to an answer. (I suspect I was asked a different question given that it is well-known that L1 contains functions that are not in L2. Perhaps a product of Riemann-Stieltjes integrable functions that is not Riemann-Stieltjes integrable?)
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby jestingrabbit » Mon Dec 03, 2007 5:18 am UTC

Torn Apart By Dingos wrote:What is the counter-example? Also, what text did you use?


A simple counter example (that doesn't need Lebesgue measurability) is the functions f(x)=g(x) = x-1/2 for 0<x<1 and 0 otherwise. The antiderivative tells you that the integral is finite and when you form the product you get 1/x for 0<x<1 and 0 otherwise, which doesn't have a (finite) integral.

Not that difficult a counter example, must have been a different question.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby DemonHybrid » Mon Dec 03, 2007 7:32 am UTC

scowdich wrote:There's a mythical final exam given by a philosophy professor: he places a chair at the front of the room, passes out blue books, and says "Prove this chair doesn't exist."

Legendarily, the only A was garnered by a student who wrote "What chair?"


I don't get it. Isn't that debunked by the "Just because you believe something, doesn't make it true" saying?

Just because I can say that the chair isn't there doesn't mean it isnt.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby scowdich » Mon Dec 03, 2007 8:42 am UTC

And just because you say the chair is there doesn't mean it actually is. And here we come to the point of the exercise...

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby gmalivuk » Mon Dec 03, 2007 9:00 am UTC

jestingrabbit wrote:
Torn Apart By Dingos wrote:What is the counter-example? Also, what text did you use?


A simple counter example (that doesn't need Lebesgue measurability) is the functions f(x)=g(x) = x-1/2 for 0<x<1 and 0 otherwise. The antiderivative tells you that the integral is finite and when you form the product you get 1/x for 0<x<1 and 0 otherwise, which doesn't have a (finite) integral.

Not that difficult a counter example, must have been a different question.

1/x is most certainly Lebesgue integrable. Your not difficult example fails pretty hard at actually being a counterexample, so I suspect it wasn't a different question.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby antonfire » Mon Dec 03, 2007 9:59 am UTC

Not according to MathWorld. Usually, a function with an infinite integral isn't considered integrable. (I'm not saying that this is "the right way", but it's apparently a common enough convention that it's the one on MathWorld.)

I'm assuming that you mean that 1/x is measurable. The question can't have been about that, because the product of two measurable functions is measurable (and I'm sure any analysis text would mention this).
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby jestingrabbit » Mon Dec 03, 2007 10:43 am UTC

@gmalivuk: what antonfire said. Otherwise, why have the two words integrable and measurable?

Though I did realise that 1/x isn't bounded on every finite width interval so it isn't properly Riemann integrable. You can get around that by "breaking it up" into a countable collection of intervals, and translating them to places that are a fixed distance from one another. But again, not really all that difficult.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Aradae » Thu Dec 06, 2007 10:07 pm UTC

DemonHybrid wrote:
scowdich wrote:There's a mythical final exam given by a philosophy professor: he places a chair at the front of the room, passes out blue books, and says "Prove this chair doesn't exist."

Legendarily, the only A was garnered by a student who wrote "What chair?"


I don't get it. Isn't that debunked by the "Just because you believe something, doesn't make it true" saying?

Just because I can say that the chair isn't there doesn't mean it isnt.


I think the point is by trying to prove that it doesn't exist the students are validating its existence.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Iori_Yagami » Fri Dec 07, 2007 12:26 am UTC

Please tell me whether I have forgotten all school (and 1st year Uni)physics or not -
the guy who drew an elephant in OP solved almost everything, but forgot to equate two energies? So m * g * h = k * x2 And the object would never stop, because there is no friction? Or am I missing something? :?
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby scowdich » Fri Dec 07, 2007 4:25 am UTC

Well, the object would stop for an infinitesimal amount of time when the spring is at maximum compression...I believe the problem is asking what that maximum compression would be.

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby hyperion » Mon Dec 10, 2007 12:52 am UTC

A friend's answer for the chemistry exam the week before last. The question was something along the lines of
You are a hydrogen molecule in a balloon filled with equal moles of hydrogen and oxygen molecules at 2 atm pressure. A student ignites the balloon with a match. Describe:
1) What you see initially
2) What you see during combustion
3) Your life as a water molecule

ImageImage

I wrote an equally strange essay, and even managed to play the cheesecake game, but my scanner's broken so you can't see it.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby aguacate » Mon Dec 10, 2007 2:54 am UTC

HYPERiON wrote:A friend's answer for the chemistry exam the week before last. The question was something along the lines of
You are a hydrogen molecule in a balloon filled with equal moles of hydrogen and oxygen molecules at 2 atm pressure. A student ignites the balloon with a match. Describe:
1) What you see initially
2) What you see during combustion
3) Your life as a water molecule

ImageImage



10/20, that blows.
Image

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby hyperion » Mon Dec 10, 2007 4:07 am UTC

aguacate wrote:10/20, that blows.

The average was 4/20 and the top was something like 15, so it's pretty good.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Zohar » Mon Dec 10, 2007 5:04 pm UTC

HYPERiON wrote:ImageImage


Very nice. Reminds me of Flatland.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby oxoiron » Mon Dec 10, 2007 5:10 pm UTC

HYPERiON wrote:
aguacate wrote:10/20, that blows.

The average was 4/20 and the top was something like 15, so it's pretty good.

It still blows. I've graded a LOT of chemistry papers, and that is without a doubt the most entertaining one I've ever seen. The grader had a serious stick up his butt.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Not an Evil Robot » Tue Dec 11, 2007 11:37 pm UTC

Today was my Discrete Structures Final.
I did it pretty fast but there was one extra credit question I had no idea on.
So I drew a big cookie and wrote
"How about a nice cookie instead Mr. Grader!"

thats the best I've got =(

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby AltoidAddict » Thu Dec 13, 2007 5:54 am UTC

I've just finished my insane topology homework for the semester. This question in particular drove me crazy. Not a test, but there aren't any for the class, so I think this counts. Incidentally, if anyone knows how to do this problem, I'd be interested.

Image

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Geekthras » Thu Dec 13, 2007 6:12 am UTC

I know someone who was writing a paper on Zen Buddhism. They carefully controlled their word and paper length so that the last sheet contained the following:
"thus."



It was win. I once was unable to prove something in Geometry, so at a step that I couldn't do, I just ignored the fact that it didn't follow (I think I was using Angle-Side-Side) and put in the explanation column two up arrows, two down arrows, <- -> <- ->, the letters B and A in circles, and the word START.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Aradae » Fri Dec 14, 2007 2:47 am UTC

not math, but I answer every case study question I don't know in my anatomy and physiology class with "It could be lupus..."
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Sly Si » Sat Dec 15, 2007 12:43 am UTC

One of my friends (who may actually end up reading this at some point) and I had a very difficult math class last spring. As most of the students were grad students furiously preparing for quals, we knew the prof was going to go easy on us. There were only two problem sets and no exams, and we figured everyone would get A's (we were right). That was lucky, because the material was difficult and no one understood what was going on in lecture.

Anyway, on the last problem of the second problem set, neither of us had any idea what to do. And it was about 3 AM, so we were ready to give up. My friend, not wanting to turn in a blank sheet, drew Trogdor the Burninator on a piece of notebook paper, complete with Strong Bad's instructions on how to draw him. He labeled it "#6", stapled it to the rest of his answers, and turned it in.

He got partial credit--1/10--and a complement from the TA. Hopefully I can get him to scan it if he still has it and post it somewhere.

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby phantom » Sat Dec 15, 2007 10:29 am UTC

not quite a test answer, but it kind of goes along. I found this on http://www.kent.k12.wa.us/staff/DavidWr ... jokes.html

The Calculus Final
The setting is Ohio State University about six or seven years ago in a huge lecture hall (approximately 1000 students) for a Calculus final. Apparently this particular calculus teacher wasn't very well liked. He was one of those guys who would stand at the front of the class and yell out how much time was remaining before the end of a test, a real charmer. Since he was so busy gallivanting around the room making sure that nobody cheated and that everyone was aware of how much time they had left before their failure on the test was complete, he had the students stack the completed tests on the huge podium at the front of the room. This made for quite a mess, remember there were 1000 students in the class. Anyway, during this particular final, one guy entered the test needing a decent grade to pass the class. His only problem with Calculus was that he did poorly when rushed, and this guy standing in the front of the room barking out how much time was left before the tests had to be handed in didn't help him at all. He figured he wanted to assure himself of a good grade, so he hardly flinched when the professor said "pencils down and submit your scantron sheets and work to piles at the front of the room." Five minutes turned into ten, ten into twenty, twenty into forty ... almost an hour after the test was "officially over," our friend finally put down his pencil, gathered up his work, and headed to the front of the hall to submit his final. The whole time, the professor sat at the front of the room, strangely waiting for the student to complete his exam. "What do you think you're doing?" the professor asked as the student stood in front of him about to put down his exam on one of the neatly stacked piles of exams (the professor had plenty of time to stack the mountain of papers while he waited) It was clear that the professor had waited only to give the student a hard time. "Turning in my exam," retorted the student confidently. "I'm afraid I have some bad news for you," the professor gloated, "Your exam is an hour late. You've FAILED it and, consequently, I'll see you next term when you repeat my course." The student smiled slyly and asked the professor "Do you know who I am?" "What?" replied the professor gruffly, annoyed that the student showed no sign of emotion. The student rephrased the question mockingly, "Do you know what my name is?" "NO," snarled the professor. The student looked the professor dead in the eyes and said slowly, "I didn't think so," as he lifted up one of the stacks half way, shoved his test neatly into the center of the stack, let the stack fall burying his test in the middle, turned around, and walked casually out of the huge lecture hall.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Zohar » Sat Dec 15, 2007 11:10 am UTC

^ That was in Veronica Mars.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Azrael001 » Sat Dec 15, 2007 11:45 am UTC

That is a good story, even though I have heard it before.

When I know that I don't know the answer on a test I tend to do silly things. In most math type subjects I will let x be equal to the correct answer, and simply answer x, after of course adding the above constraint. I have also written a function to call the answer with the answer sheet included as an outside file.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby 3.14159265... » Sat Dec 15, 2007 12:00 pm UTC

Wholy crap, thats a nice story.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Kizyr » Sat Dec 15, 2007 3:31 pm UTC

Zohar wrote:^ That was in Veronica Mars.

I actually heard that story years ago (about 6-7 years ago), so it's pretty old and relatively well-known.

It's still a really good one, though. In the version I usually told, I said it was my cousin at Berkeley who was the main character. KF
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Macbi » Sat Dec 15, 2007 8:43 pm UTC

I can't find it now, but I saw a video of this on YouTube or some such site.
    Indigo is a lie.
    Which idiot decided that websites can't go within 4cm of the edge of the screen?
    There should be a null word, for the question "Is anybody there?" and to see if microphones are on.

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby korhonenpt » Sun Dec 16, 2007 12:03 am UTC

Image

Out of boredom I did this... please tell me if my answers are correct? :P

Well at first we'll have to find the velocity at which the object touches the spring. Let's call its initial position a and the maximum extended position of the spring (just as it touches it) b.

It has gravitational potential energy at A, and kinetic and b. therefore;

Ega=Ekb

mgha=.5mvb2

vb=sqrt(2gha)=sqrt(2(9.81m/s2)(5m))=9.9045m/s.

Now that we have the velocity at which the object impacts the spring, we can calculate how much the object will compress it. (x) We will call the compressed position c.

Ekb=Eec

1/2mva2=1/2kxc2

xc=sqrt((mva2)/k)

xc=sqrt((3kg)(9.9m/s)2)/100N/M))=1.71m

So the answer to the first question is that x, or the distance the spring will be compressed, is therefore 1.7 m.

Before doing the equation, since there is no friction, I'm pretty sure that means that it will go back up the ramp 5m? I'll prove it just to make sure... Let's call however high it gets d.

Eec=Egd

1/2kc2=mghd

hd=(kxc2)/2mg

hd=(100n/M(1.71m)2)/(2)(3kg)(9.81m/s)
hd=4.967m
hd=5.0m

The only reason it was a bit off was because sqrt(2(9.81m/s)(5)) was converted and rounded to decimal form.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby skeptical scientist » Sun Dec 16, 2007 6:41 pm UTC

korhonenpt wrote:Image

Out of boredom I did this... please tell me if my answers are correct? :P

More or less, but you are spending way too much effort:

Since there is no friction, the only energies in the problem are gravitational potential (mgh), spring potential (1/2kx2), and kinetic (1/2mv2). So conservation of energy tells you that when the mass is at rest (i.e. when the spring is most compressed or the block is at the top of the slope), all energy will be in one or the other of the potential forms. So it will oscillate between its starting position (all energy in gravitational potential, so height is always same as height at start) and compressing the spring by sqrt[2(3kg)g(5 m)/(100 N/m)]~1.7 m.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Macbi » Mon Dec 17, 2007 10:57 am UTC

But you're both wrong- There is an elephant in the way.
    Indigo is a lie.
    Which idiot decided that websites can't go within 4cm of the edge of the screen?
    There should be a null word, for the question "Is anybody there?" and to see if microphones are on.

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Iori_Yagami » Mon Dec 17, 2007 6:27 pm UTC

So I was right (only lost that 1/2 on my way).
They cannot defend themselves; they cannot run away. INSANITY is their only way of escape.

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby sward » Mon Dec 17, 2007 9:50 pm UTC

Again not math.

I'va had half a year of latin and we all dreaded that class. There were three active students, one who considered latin fascinating, and two boys who considered our young female teatcher hot.

Anyways a boy from my class was called to the blackboard, we often were to give an analyzation of a given sentence, so he stood there staring at the blackboard, our teatcher wanting to move on asked "now what do you wanna do with that?", the he took the eraser and cleared the blackboard and announced "Done!"...

In retrospective I'm kinda sorry for my teatcher we were her first class, and we all hated her subject...

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby roundedge » Mon Dec 17, 2007 10:51 pm UTC

In one of my math finals this semester, I was trying to factor out an (x^2-y^2) from an equation (I can't remember the specific equation). Anyways, for some reason I couldn't do it. So after covering my page in figuring and rough work, I finally gave up, drew a picture of cthullu wrapping his tentacles around the equation and wrote "Cthullu sucks the (x^2 -y^2) straight out of the equation! A truly otherworldly feat! Tremble at the power of Cthullu! QED"

Whenever I do math tests, I frequently write down my thought processes, even if those thought processes have little to do with the math. I was trying to solve an ODE this semester using variation of parameters, because undetermined coefficients method had proved unsuccessful, but I couldn't remember the exact form of the huge equation that goes along with it, so I wrote "let's see if I can remember this sucka." Wrote down what I thought was the equation, realized I'd blanked on how to do the wronskian, wrote "5 minutes till the exam is over, and then it's christmas, fuck the wronskian" Turned back a couple pages to a blank page that said "for rough work, will not be marked" and drew a picture of a ghost to surprise my TA after he had cruised through marking the true or false sections.

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Boatz! » Mon Dec 17, 2007 10:52 pm UTC

An old Religious Studies one I heard.

Q: What's a Hindu?
A: It lays eggs
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby phantom » Tue Dec 18, 2007 1:36 am UTC

More of an amusing question than answer, but this happened today, so here goes. Our calculus teacher doesn't like to give us tests on mondays if at all possible, but the scheduling made it so she had to. To make up for it, she gave us two bonuses. One was, I think, take the derivative of arcsin(arctan(sqrt(x))). The other was: "What christmas present do I want to get for my daughter this year?" She'd been talking about how she can't find a Hannah Montana guitar for her daughter for the last few weeks, making it five free points for all of us :D
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10 PRINT "Hello World"
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Geekthras » Tue Dec 18, 2007 4:24 am UTC

Read the comments on http://tjic.com/?p=5455

About 3/4 of the way, through, conversation breaks off and goes in a completely different direction.
Wait. With a SPOON?!

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Azrael001 » Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:21 am UTC

I was just reading through Java Pirates and came across this comic... it fits even though it's fiction.

This should work now.
Last edited by Azrael001 on Thu Dec 20, 2007 4:45 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby bobtpawn » Wed Dec 19, 2007 5:46 am UTC

A friend and I were taking an abstract algebra class together and there was one homework problem we just couldn't answer. So, my friend answers, "This is the sixth edition of this book, so the probability that the problem is in error is well within acceptable bounds. Since they would not ask us to prove something false, the statement must be true."

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby pkuky » Wed Dec 19, 2007 3:50 pm UTC

theree was a question on a phisics test that went "draw a graph of the place and velocity of the ball as dependent on time", so someone drew a zero graph and wrote "the observer is sitting on the ball".
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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby Govalant » Wed Dec 19, 2007 4:22 pm UTC

Azrael001 wrote:I was just reading through Java Pirates and came across this comic... it fits even though it's fiction.


Image



Can't see it :/.
Now these points of data make a beautiful line.

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Re: Amusing answers to tests

Postby spectacu-awesome » Wed Dec 19, 2007 4:26 pm UTC

In chem, (electrolysis) no one in the class could figure out what was the source of the loss of efficiency in a copper electro-refining cell (it had an actual efficiency of 3%). So, tiny tiny goblins swam out of the anode to steal charges from the solution and bring them back to the anode. Goblins are the ultimate answer for anything chemical that can't be explained.
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