Childhood (not so) crackpot theories

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Charlie!
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Charlie! » Fri Aug 29, 2008 6:25 am UTC

taby wrote:I don't want to grow up, I'm a Toys R' Us kid... :P

If you take the interactions within a body and reduce them to being anisotropic, do they increase in strength? That is, if you reduce the spatial extent, does the temporal extent increase?

Taking that notion and applying it to gravitation, a model for the spiral galaxy flat rotation curve is constructed. This is summarized in equation (22), which describes a running of the coupling constant that occurs beyond the point where Keplerian falloff is expected to commence but fails to do so ([imath]r_a[/imath]), trivially resulting in the desired flat rotation curve.

It's under review. And no, I haven't gone ahead and melted my piddly dual 8800 setup trying to test it with a 10^10 particle simulation, so please don't ask. :) This tongue-in-cheek comment is directed to a certain someone, in good fun -- if you're still around the fora, everything past equation (14) has changed dramatically, for the better, I hope.

Would this lead to a large observable difference (1/c in one of the equations, I believe) between spiral and globular galaxies?
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taby
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby taby » Fri Aug 29, 2008 6:04 pm UTC

Charlie! wrote:
taby wrote:I don't want to grow up, I'm a Toys R' Us kid... :P

If you take the interactions within a body and reduce them to being anisotropic, do they increase in strength? That is, if you reduce the spatial extent, does the temporal extent increase?

Taking that notion and applying it to gravitation, a model for the spiral galaxy flat rotation curve is constructed. This is summarized in equation (22), which describes a running of the coupling constant that occurs beyond the point where Keplerian falloff is expected to commence but fails to do so ([imath]r_a[/imath]), trivially resulting in the desired flat rotation curve.

It's under review. And no, I haven't gone ahead and melted my piddly dual 8800 setup trying to test it with a 10^10 particle simulation, so please don't ask. :) This tongue-in-cheek comment is directed to a certain someone, in good fun -- if you're still around the fora, everything past equation (14) has changed dramatically, for the better, I hope.

Would this lead to a large observable difference (1/c in one of the equations, I believe) between spiral and globular galaxies?


Can you please provide some catalogue numbers for the ``globular galaxies'' you had in mind?

Or are you referring to dwarf spheroidals? I haven't begun to analyze the magnitude of the effect caused by local anisotropies, such as in the case of a very roughly spherical galaxy, but one can only expect that the falloff will be non-Keplerian. It's only in the case of a lack of local anisotropies (Cooperstock and Tieu's idealistic ball of dust) where Keplerian falloff is expected to occur. Please keep in mind this is dealing with the weak-field portion of these systems.

Sorry if I haven't answered your question well enough, but that's the only answer at the moment.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Uber_Apple » Sat Aug 30, 2008 10:09 am UTC

When i was between 6 and 8 years old i couldnt understand why NASA scientists couldnt simply make a machine to remove the carbon from carbon dioxide to 'recycle' it into oxygen, thus eliminating the problem of oxygen on manned space missions. I didnt know much about chemistry back then (i liked space and magnets) and i didnt realise that if I'd thought of it just then, someone else probably already had and failed.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby ACU-LP » Sat Aug 30, 2008 10:33 am UTC

Well, technically you could to it using fission/fusion. However the product would probably be highly radioactive, and horribly inefficient.

Which reminds me on how I figured you could turn lead to gold.

Yay for technicalities.
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Outchanter » Sat Aug 30, 2008 5:28 pm UTC

Technically you could use photosynthesis, but I'm guessing that countering CO2 production requires more plants than they'd be willing to carry on the short missions they've flown so far. It's probably easier just to store the oxygen you'll need for a several day flight and filter out the CO2 some other way.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Force42 » Sat Aug 30, 2008 6:49 pm UTC

Not so much a crackpot theory, but a project with crackpot logic behind it.

For whatever reason, one day when I was 4 years old, I wanted to build fireworks.
I knew:
1. Fireworks came in cylindrical containers
2. Fireworks emit bright colors

I did not have access to explosives, let alone matches, so I substituted the brightly colored sparks with HappyMeal toys, and the cylindrical container with an empty oatmeal container.

I filled the oatmeal container with HappyMeal toys packed as tightly as possible, and then 'launched' it in my room, expecting the oatmeal container to magically split apart and have the brightly colored toys rain down around me.

I made several miscalculations in this endeavor:
1. HappyMeal toys are considerably heavier than burning bits of metal
2. Cardboard containers don't magically rip apart
3. There was a glass light directly above my launch point

So the 'firework' went up, and the glass light came down on my head. I still have a scar on my neck where I got hit by a piece of glass.

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Charlie!
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Charlie! » Sat Aug 30, 2008 10:23 pm UTC

taby wrote:
Charlie! wrote:
taby wrote:I don't want to grow up, I'm a Toys R' Us kid... :P

If you take the interactions within a body and reduce them to being anisotropic, do they increase in strength? That is, if you reduce the spatial extent, does the temporal extent increase?

Taking that notion and applying it to gravitation, a model for the spiral galaxy flat rotation curve is constructed. This is summarized in equation (22), which describes a running of the coupling constant that occurs beyond the point where Keplerian falloff is expected to commence but fails to do so ([imath]r_a[/imath]), trivially resulting in the desired flat rotation curve.

It's under review. And no, I haven't gone ahead and melted my piddly dual 8800 setup trying to test it with a 10^10 particle simulation, so please don't ask. :) This tongue-in-cheek comment is directed to a certain someone, in good fun -- if you're still around the fora, everything past equation (14) has changed dramatically, for the better, I hope.

Would this lead to a large observable difference (1/c in one of the equations, I believe) between spiral and globular galaxies?


Can you please provide some catalogue numbers for the ``globular galaxies'' you had in mind?

Or are you referring to dwarf spheroidals? I haven't begun to analyze the magnitude of the effect caused by local anisotropies, such as in the case of a very roughly spherical galaxy, but one can only expect that the falloff will be non-Keplerian. It's only in the case of a lack of local anisotropies (Cooperstock and Tieu's idealistic ball of dust) where Keplerian falloff is expected to occur. Please keep in mind this is dealing with the weak-field portion of these systems.

Sorry if I haven't answered your question well enough, but that's the only answer at the moment.

Erm, ellipsoidal :) Just thinking of how you'd test something along the lines of this. Erm, M49, M60, and M87 are some examples. If M87 (chosen for this example because it's [I'm told] very large) seems to have less dark matter than spiral galaxies, that would be evidence for your hypothesis, since it's a 3 dimensional ellipsoid. Interestingly, a quick google search for 'dark matter elliptical spiral' turned up quite a few secondary sources to that effect! My excitement about that faded a bit when I saw that many of them mentioned the strong disagreement based on some property or another of elliptical galaxies that seems to have caused mismeasurement. Which in turn, would be a major problem for your paper.

http://currents.ucsc.edu/05-06/10-03/galaxies.asp
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby The-Rabid-Monkey » Sun Aug 31, 2008 10:44 am UTC

So anyway, tonight I was feeling a bit philosophical, and ended up ranting to my mate on msn. I confused him thoroughly and probably convinced him I'm mad, but this is what I came up with.


Maybe I'm crazy, but I see things different, and everyone sees me as crazy, but I don't, and I see them as normal, and I see myself Interacting with them, but in reality I'm actually some crazy guy walking around talking to himself.
Actually... In that case, maybe this world doesn't exist.
Maybe it's all just an invention of my mind, or maybe I'm just the invention of some other persons mind and I appear to have conscious thought because that person thinks this world is real, and not an invention of their own mind.
If it's all just an invention of my mind, maybe I just see others as having conscious thought, and when I can't see them, or am not interacting with them, they don't exist, because they're all just an invention of my crazy mind. So even when you type back saying, no you're just crazy, it's actually just my mind imagining that you're typing that back, when in actual fact you don't actually exist, and I'm just imagining you. So that would mean that I'm the only person who has conscious thought in this world I invented in my mind.
Maybe that's why sometimes I catch a glimpse of something quickly in my mind, then a few months or years later I experience it and remember that instance when I caught a glimpse of it, because this world is entirely my invention and so you know everything that ever will happen, and ever has happened. But I don't actually know everything that has ever happened, is happening and ever will happen, because it's all just an invention of my mind, so I just think it is happening. I just think of a situation, and then a couple of years down the track, my mind remembers that situation and creates it.
It's even entirely possible that humans aren't even real, maybe they can't actually exist. I could actually be some alien that's sulphur based, thinking that carbon based life forms are possible, though in reality carbon is too unstable to be a basis of life. Hell, it's possible that none of the elements that I know actually exist. Maybe things just are. Maybe there are no building blocks for matter, maybe matter is just solid, not made out of atoms.
Maybe matter doesn't exist, maybe everything is just energy, and all I am is a spark of energy that somehow, in some strange way gained a thought process. Maybe I'm the only remaining thing from a universe of sorts, the only remaining piece of energy, and apart from one tiny piece of energy that is me, there is nothing.
Perhaps all of this world does exist, but I don't maybe I'm a bolt of lightning, and in the billionth of a second that I exist, I managed to consume a humans thought patterns and gain an understanding of this world, or a loose understanding. And all the years of my life are actually just a billionth of a second long, but I don't see them that way.

Now, I could go on, but I'm sure I've freaked you all out enough with my crackpot theory, but then again, maybe it isn't a theory, maybe it's all true ;)
Also maybe none of this makes sense, even though it makes complete rational sense to me as a theory, but then again, different ways of looking at things, maybe you people won't understand it.
Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right. - Salvor Hardin, From Isaac Asimov's "Foundation".

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby sakeniwefu » Sun Aug 31, 2008 12:12 pm UTC

Well, I used to think I could power my spaceship designs with large lightbulbs(the larger the better) when I was 3 or so, but it isn't a crackpot theory anymore.
:lol:

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby ACU-LP » Sun Aug 31, 2008 2:24 pm UTC

To The-Rabid-Monkey.

Interesting, you've got me thinking (but is that really such a good thing?)

Also, the thing where you "remember" something then it happens later on? I call it double de-ja-vu. Its kinda freaky sometimes. Especially as once me and one of my closest friends double-de-ja-vu'd the exact same thing at the same moment. *shivers*

Anybody else had similar experiences....or any experience of double-de-ja-vu? (I think we may need to create a new thread about it....some interesting discussions could be caused by it....including what causes the thing itself.
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Kesho » Sun Aug 31, 2008 7:49 pm UTC

I've just remembered another theory I had.
I thought that our universe was finite, but at the edge of it would be some kind of giant gateway or portal which, when passed through, would send you into another neighboring universe where everything mostly the same, with small differences, like maybe you would have different colored hair or be a centimeter taller: incredibly minor things. But, if you passed through enough of these gateways the universe you landed in would be significantly different from the one you started in. So, for a while, I wanted to be an astronaut, but only so I could reach the universe where we were all talking fish. :D

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby The-Rabid-Monkey » Sun Aug 31, 2008 9:18 pm UTC

Yeah, that whole thing of seeming to live out a dream, or memory again is pretty weird, I wonder what causes that...
Never let your sense of morals prevent you from doing what is right. - Salvor Hardin, From Isaac Asimov's "Foundation".

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby wst » Sun Aug 31, 2008 10:19 pm UTC

Ooh, I used to think that those little alien in a pod things ate the jelly they were in, and if you put them moulding-flashing to moulding-flashing, they would mate and split open, yielding a baby alien. Oh, and seal up again.
I worried about running out of jelly so I asked the bus driver how I'd figure out what was in the jelly.
He said gas-spectrometry...
(Oh, I also wanted to make a cyclotron in my bedroom. No-one mentioned the possibility of severe injuries/frying the house circuit. But I never found any instructons on how to make one, so I'm okay still...)
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories

Postby themuffinking » Mon Sep 01, 2008 2:27 pm UTC

Shadowfish wrote:The biggest problem for me when I believed this was that fire does not seem to evolve.


And it's a good thing, too. Can you imagine fire with claws? Damn.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories

Postby ACU-LP » Mon Sep 01, 2008 4:42 pm UTC

themuffinking wrote:
Shadowfish wrote:The biggest problem for me when I believed this was that fire does not seem to evolve.


And it's a good thing, too. Can you imagine fire with claws? Damn.


Anybody here remember a show called sliders? I watched it when I was little, and one place they went had sentient fire! Cool, but it had a tendancy to be evil and suck oxygen from its victims....
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby joeyhndc » Mon Sep 01, 2008 5:45 pm UTC

Right, so, a squared plus b squared plus c squared... = distance squared. This is true for any number of dimensions.
Take it to four dimensions. This means that an object can have the same co-ordinates in the first 3 dimensions (a , b, and c), and not overlap with another point with those first three dimensions as long as the two had different d's. The only way two objects can occupy the same 3d space is if they do it at different time.
Ergo, time is the 4th dimension.

Note: This means anything can be represented by a 4d vector where (0,0,0,0) represents the location and time of the big bang. D can only be positive, thus, no traveling backwards in time.

Second note: A friend suggested that a 5th dimension of possibility could exist, allowing 2 things to be in the same place at the same time, but behaving differently. He basically thought up the parallel universe theory.

There are plenty more because I was in an accelerated enrichment program all through school, and all us coddled, self-important kids had our crazy theories. I'll try to think of some more.

A more recent one I had was that I (or you) am/are the only person that can effect change in the world, because the human interactions can only go differently if you're present. Taking you out of the equation would yield the same social result every time. So from your reference frame, you're the deciding factor in the development of humanity. Pat yourself on the back.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby nescalona » Mon Sep 01, 2008 7:50 pm UTC

Sometime around age 10 I had heard something about the universe expanding. I figured, well, what's expanding without an edge? So if something goes horribly wrong in this universe in the distant future (along the lines of strangelets, though I didn't know about those at the time), we can abandon ship by traveling over in a spaceship to the edge of the universe and pushing on it with enough force to make a new universe bubble off. Then I realized there wouldn't be any matter in the new universe, so I decided the spaceship had to be really huge and gather up lots of stars and suchlike on the way to the edge of the universe. I think I still have index cards lying around where I diagrammed everything.

And this isn't a crackpot theory, but from as early as I remember until age 12-13, when bored in the car I would imagine I had Cyclops eyes with red lasers that would slice perfectly through anything I looked at. As our car drove along I'd slice off the tops of cars, make trees fall on houses, decapitate people, etc. In case you couldn't tell, I'm male. :) When I later told my mom about this, she said she did a similar thing when she was the same age, except instead of rays of death she had rays of happiness, where she would just look at people walking on the sidewalk and make them feel better. The differences between man and woman! :lol:

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby jmorgan3 » Mon Sep 01, 2008 8:21 pm UTC

nescalona wrote:The differences between man and woman!

You, sir, are a sexist and have no business serving as Harvard's President!
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby joeyhndc » Mon Sep 01, 2008 8:52 pm UTC

nescalona wrote:And this isn't a crackpot theory, but from as early as I remember until age 12-13, when bored in the car I would imagine I had Cyclops eyes with red lasers that would slice perfectly through anything I looked at. As our car drove along I'd slice off the tops of cars, make trees fall on houses, decapitate people, etc. In case you couldn't tell, I'm male. :) When I later told my mom about this, she said she did a similar thing when she was the same age, except instead of rays of death she had rays of happiness, where she would just look at people walking on the sidewalk and make them feel better. The differences between man and woman! :lol:


We took alot of roadtrips in my childhood, and I did that all the time as well, sometimes with the physically-accurate responses, other times just imagining the view without any obstructions above a certain point. I also liked to headbob along with the variations in height of the telephone lines. My sister recently revealed she did that on our road trips too. I wonder how common this is?

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories

Postby qbg » Tue Sep 02, 2008 12:09 am UTC

BlackSails wrote:As a child I thought there ought to be some way to make division as easy as multiplication.

Is this a really crackpot theory? On a slide rule, division is basically just as easy as multiplication.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby wst » Tue Sep 02, 2008 12:36 am UTC

joeyhndc wrote:
nescalona wrote:And this isn't a crackpot theory, but from as early as I remember until age 12-13, when bored in the car I would imagine I had Cyclops eyes with red lasers that would slice perfectly through anything I looked at. As our car drove along I'd slice off the tops of cars, make trees fall on houses, decapitate people, etc. In case you couldn't tell, I'm male. :) When I later told my mom about this, she said she did a similar thing when she was the same age, except instead of rays of death she had rays of happiness, where she would just look at people walking on the sidewalk and make them feel better. The differences between man and woman! :lol:


We took alot of roadtrips in my childhood, and I did that all the time as well, sometimes with the physically-accurate responses, other times just imagining the view without any obstructions above a certain point. I also liked to headbob along with the variations in height of the telephone lines. My sister recently revealed she did that on our road trips too. I wonder how common this is?

I sometimes try to visualise flying above crowds. And other times I do blood splatter and head disintegrationing (new word) from a bullet (All slowmo). When I dislike someone mainly...
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Clockwork_Golem » Tue Sep 02, 2008 1:31 pm UTC

joeyhndc wrote:
nescalona wrote:And this isn't a crackpot theory, but from as early as I remember until age 12-13, when bored in the car I would imagine I had Cyclops eyes with red lasers that would slice perfectly through anything I looked at. As our car drove along I'd slice off the tops of cars, make trees fall on houses, decapitate people, etc. In case you couldn't tell, I'm male. :) When I later told my mom about this, she said she did a similar thing when she was the same age, except instead of rays of death she had rays of happiness, where she would just look at people walking on the sidewalk and make them feel better. The differences between man and woman! :lol:


We took alot of roadtrips in my childhood, and I did that all the time as well, sometimes with the physically-accurate responses, other times just imagining the view without any obstructions above a certain point. I also liked to headbob along with the variations in height of the telephone lines. My sister recently revealed she did that on our road trips too. I wonder how common this is?

I did something similar, I imagined I was cutting through all the bushes at the side of the road but I had to jump over telephone poles and such. I didn't actually do a headbob but I moved my eyes over them.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby rho » Tue Sep 02, 2008 2:27 pm UTC

Clockwork_Golem wrote:
joeyhndc wrote:
nescalona wrote:And this isn't a crackpot theory, but from as early as I remember until age 12-13, when bored in the car I would imagine I had Cyclops eyes with red lasers that would slice perfectly through anything I looked at. As our car drove along I'd slice off the tops of cars, make trees fall on houses, decapitate people, etc. In case you couldn't tell, I'm male. :) When I later told my mom about this, she said she did a similar thing when she was the same age, except instead of rays of death she had rays of happiness, where she would just look at people walking on the sidewalk and make them feel better. The differences between man and woman! :lol:


We took alot of roadtrips in my childhood, and I did that all the time as well, sometimes with the physically-accurate responses, other times just imagining the view without any obstructions above a certain point. I also liked to headbob along with the variations in height of the telephone lines. My sister recently revealed she did that on our road trips too. I wonder how common this is?

I did something similar, I imagined I was cutting through all the bushes at the side of the road but I had to jump over telephone poles and such. I didn't actually do a headbob but I moved my eyes over them.


I did exactly the same stuff. I used to bounce a spec of dirt over tree tops and things by bobbing my head.
When I was very little I used to think I could controll the speed of the car with my eyes. (Blurry things move faster, focussing on things made them not blurry -> focussing on things made them move more slowly. Simple.)
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Nomic » Tue Sep 02, 2008 3:43 pm UTC

I did (and still do) "jump" over shadows in the road when the car passes them by tightening the muscles in my legs and butt. And I imagne annoing people suddenly bursting in flames or exploding in a fiery blast.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby ACU-LP » Tue Sep 02, 2008 11:23 pm UTC

Nomic wrote:I did (and still do) "jump" over shadows in the road when the car passes them by tightening the muscles in my legs and butt. And I imagne annoing people suddenly bursting in flames or exploding in a fiery blast.


The jumping over shadows thing is done by a lot of people, especially xkcd forumites. Its pretty much the showing of a mild form of OCD, like not stepping on cracks, etc. There is a thread reffering to that somewhere....*Cant find*

But anyway, I did a lot of travelling when I was younger; across Europe, the west side of America, England, Australia, New Zealand, etc. I had a theory that wherever I "went", I was still in the same place, only everything around me had been changed (this is an extention of my earlier theory about me being a sociological experiment). It first came about when I noticed a certain set of faces/people recurring everywhere I went, with just minor differences, etc.
I realize now however, that the logisitcs to do this would be....well....epic. And far above anything people would be bothered to do.
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Xanthir » Wed Sep 03, 2008 12:55 am UTC

ACU-LP wrote:
Nomic wrote:I did (and still do) "jump" over shadows in the road when the car passes them by tightening the muscles in my legs and butt. And I imagne annoing people suddenly bursting in flames or exploding in a fiery blast.


The jumping over shadows thing is done by a lot of people, especially xkcd forumites. Its pretty much the showing of a mild form of OCD, like not stepping on cracks, etc. There is a thread reffering to that somewhere....*Cant find*


It's in the Comics forum, I think. I remember participating in it.

Yeah, most of us have some mild OCD.
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby ikkleste » Wed Sep 03, 2008 11:35 am UTC

1) I used believe that gravity worked in a way similar to archemede's principle. That we only stayed down on the ground because we were denser than air.

2) I used to reason that if as you go around the world the time of day changed (hence difference timezones) that at the point of the world where midnight occured the date must change (the international date line). If therefore you could cross the line again without going back you'd gain another day; then another. Now that would mean circumnavigating the globe a hard task in just 24hrs. But if you went to the North Pole (or south I suppose) you could literally cross the date line many times a minute, thus forward or back in time.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Shiyiya » Thu Sep 04, 2008 11:31 am UTC

Clockwork_Golem wrote:
joeyhndc wrote:
nescalona wrote:And this isn't a crackpot theory, but from as early as I remember until age 12-13, when bored in the car I would imagine I had Cyclops eyes with red lasers that would slice perfectly through anything I looked at. As our car drove along I'd slice off the tops of cars, make trees fall on houses, decapitate people, etc. In case you couldn't tell, I'm male. :) When I later told my mom about this, she said she did a similar thing when she was the same age, except instead of rays of death she had rays of happiness, where she would just look at people walking on the sidewalk and make them feel better. The differences between man and woman! :lol:


We took alot of roadtrips in my childhood, and I did that all the time as well, sometimes with the physically-accurate responses, other times just imagining the view without any obstructions above a certain point. I also liked to headbob along with the variations in height of the telephone lines. My sister recently revealed she did that on our road trips too. I wonder how common this is?

I did something similar, I imagined I was cutting through all the bushes at the side of the road but I had to jump over telephone poles and such. I didn't actually do a headbob but I moved my eyes over them.

I imagined the car a few feet over with one set of wheels on the sidewalk knocking over mailboxes and street signs but swerving back into the street for telephone poles and traffic lights (too sturdy). Actually, why did I put that in the past tense? I still do that :P

When I was in third grade I convinced two of my best friends (and believed myself) that I was actually a dragon, from a world called Dragonland (that TV show totally stole the name from me). In Dragonland, the planet was flat, with giant holes through to the other side all over the place. On one side you were human, jump through a hole and you're on the other side as a dragon. In Dragonland I lived in a huge old house with my parents (not my actual parents, other fictional parents) and my older but irresponsible sister Annie (I'm an only child). My parents therefore had me in charge of Annie. At some point our house in Dragonland had burned down and Annie and I had had to come to this world. This meant that my parents weren't my real parents. I had my friends convinced of this and we would "train" on the playground to go back to Dragonland :lol: Oh, and Annie lives in the space between the sheets of drywall at the head of my bed. I always used to buckle her into my dad's car with me, pulling the middle seatbelt as tight as I could to hold her down (I was a sadistic little thing, wasn't I?). Oh, and the crescent moon was Annie's toenail clippings :lol:

I was fantastic at convincing other people and even myself of things. In fifth grade I convinced an entire class of second graders that a girl had once gone into the sewers under the school and never returned. I think she was called Olivia. Oh, and my entire class competed to say they saw the creepiest things in the houses on the other side of the fence from the playground. The most memorable of these being my friend Patrice's white cat that ran and jumped onto a white rock and vanished, and the guy I saw that cut his own head off and let the blood run into a bowl ("It looks like ketchup!")

Man, I was a weird little kid. What other weird theories did I have....

Oh, apparently when I was three I thought jellyfish were plankton. I thought I was wrong about this for years, until a seventh grade science class proved my three-year-old self right! (I learned the word plankton from Bill Nye - of course!)

Oh, when I was nine I invented something to let blind people see. I still have the box I designed for my product somewhere (cereal box covered in black construction paper and written on with gel pens). The idea was to connect electrodes to the back of the neck and hook them up to a camera. Actually, if you got the signals right, I don't see why you couldn't hook up small cameras inside glass eyes to the optical nerve.There would still be the problem of moving your eyes....

Oh yeah. For years I designed elaborate treehouses and underground civilisations (mostly underground things because I like in a desert and there aren't really that many trees). A friend and I actually started trying to dig my ideas once... We got a pretty damn big hole before my dad made us fill it in. Took us ages too. The ground in the desert is hard.

I had an idea once for a force field that let air and water but not pollutants pass through, and any life forms but humans. Anything human or man-made would have to be specifically allowed inside. This was for the civilisation I was going to start on an island a la Swiss Family Robinson (I love that book. It is so ridiculously impossible to have everything they have on one island, but it is the most kickass book ever.)

I tihnk I've rambled enoguh for now, I'll see if I tihnk of anything else later :D
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby ACU-LP » Thu Sep 04, 2008 3:42 pm UTC

Shiyiya wrote:
Clockwork_Golem wrote:
joeyhndc wrote:
nescalona wrote:When I was in third grade I convinced two of my best friends (and believed myself) that I was actually a dragon, from a world called Dragonland (that TV show totally stole the name from me). In Dragonland, the planet was flat, with giant holes through to the other side all over the place. On one side you were human, jump through a hole and you're on the other side as a dragon. In Dragonland I lived in a huge old house with my parents (not my actual parents, other fictional parents) and my older but irresponsible sister Annie (I'm an only child). My parents therefore had me in charge of Annie. At some point our house in Dragonland had burned down and Annie and I had had to come to this world. This meant that my parents weren't my real parents. I had my friends convinced of this and we would "train" on the playground to go back to Dragonland :lol: Oh, and Annie lives in the space between the sheets of drywall at the head of my bed. I always used to buckle her into my dad's car with me, pulling the middle seatbelt as tight as I could to hold her down (I was a sadistic little thing, wasn't I?). Oh, and the crescent moon was Annie's toenail clippings :lol:


I used to do the very same sort of thing as a kid, but with raptors. The dragons came more recently.
Also, I think I know the show you're talking about....I loved it but they took it off the air in England for some stupid reason, and right before the finale!
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby bluebambue » Fri Sep 05, 2008 3:19 am UTC

Shiyiya wrote:
Clockwork_Golem wrote:
joeyhndc wrote:
nescalona wrote:And this isn't a crackpot theory, but from as early as I remember until age 12-13, when bored in the car I would imagine I had Cyclops eyes with red lasers that would slice perfectly through anything I looked at. As our car drove along I'd slice off the tops of cars, make trees fall on houses, decapitate people, etc. In case you couldn't tell, I'm male. :) When I later told my mom about this, she said she did a similar thing when she was the same age, except instead of rays of death she had rays of happiness, where she would just look at people walking on the sidewalk and make them feel better. The differences between man and woman! :lol:


We took alot of roadtrips in my childhood, and I did that all the time as well, sometimes with the physically-accurate responses, other times just imagining the view without any obstructions above a certain point. I also liked to headbob along with the variations in height of the telephone lines. My sister recently revealed she did that on our road trips too. I wonder how common this is?

I did something similar, I imagined I was cutting through all the bushes at the side of the road but I had to jump over telephone poles and such. I didn't actually do a headbob but I moved my eyes over them.

I imagined the car a few feet over with one set of wheels on the sidewalk knocking over mailboxes and street signs but swerving back into the street for telephone poles and traffic lights (too sturdy). Actually, why did I put that in the past tense? I still do that :P


I do something similar. I imagined a giant blade coming out from the side of the car. I tried to figure out a way that it could go around telephone poles without damaging it. It would need to be something like the skycar things you see at amusement parks when they need to go over the support poles.

Female BTW

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby sakeniwefu » Fri Sep 05, 2008 8:45 am UTC

ACU-LP wrote:The jumping over shadows thing is done by a lot of people, especially xkcd forumites.

So we are xkcd forumites because we jump over shadows or we jump over shadows because we are xkcd forumites? :?
This is not a crackpot theory anyways. However, if we are into child crackpots, I used to have my toys revere me as a god called "Movement". :lol:

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby kellsbells » Fri Sep 05, 2008 9:00 am UTC

Shiyiya wrote:I was fantastic at convincing other people and even myself of things. In fifth grade I convinced an entire class of second graders that a girl had once gone into the sewers under the school and never returned. I think she was called Olivia. Oh, and my entire class competed to say they saw the creepiest things in the houses on the other side of the fence from the playground. The most memorable of these being my friend Patrice's white cat that ran and jumped onto a white rock and vanished, and the guy I saw that cut his own head off and let the blood run into a bowl ("It looks like ketchup!")
I did this too! I told my entire class this horrible story about the old gym teacher killing kids in the gym supply room and then hiding the bodies in this rusted old equipment box next to the baseball diamond. And shortly after I told people this story, our class went on a walk through the woods right behind the school, where my friends and I discovered a mysterious single sock and an old bicycle wheel. My response, of course, was to continue my story: one kid that the gym teacher attacked managed to escape and ride away on his bike, but the teacher caught up with him in the woods and grabbed his bike, until he crashed and then the teacher killed him.

... In retrospect, that's really, really creepy.
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Shiyiya » Sat Sep 06, 2008 1:48 pm UTC

kellsbells wrote:
Shiyiya wrote:I was fantastic at convincing other people and even myself of things. In fifth grade I convinced an entire class of second graders that a girl had once gone into the sewers under the school and never returned. I think she was called Olivia. Oh, and my entire class competed to say they saw the creepiest things in the houses on the other side of the fence from the playground. The most memorable of these being my friend Patrice's white cat that ran and jumped onto a white rock and vanished, and the guy I saw that cut his own head off and let the blood run into a bowl ("It looks like ketchup!")
I did this too! I told my entire class this horrible story about the old gym teacher killing kids in the gym supply room and then hiding the bodies in this rusted old equipment box next to the baseball diamond. And shortly after I told people this story, our class went on a walk through the woods right behind the school, where my friends and I discovered a mysterious single sock and an old bicycle wheel. My response, of course, was to continue my story: one kid that the gym teacher attacked managed to escape and ride away on his bike, but the teacher caught up with him in the woods and grabbed his bike, until he crashed and then the teacher killed him.

... In retrospect, that's really, really creepy.

Even my classmates were convinced the houses across the fence were haunted. In fifth grade we did model rockets, and one got stuck in a tree on that side of the fence. To get it, me and another girl had to climb over the fence and climb up it. While I was over there, I looked inside the window we were most terrified of (with a classmate going Oh me yarm Oh me yarm Oh me yarm stay away). It was an empty garage, and right under the window was a little red wagon. A sodding little red wagon. I still find that hilarious. We were so terrified of that window it wasn't even funny.
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby electronic mily » Sat Sep 06, 2008 2:42 pm UTC

I don't remember exactly how old I was when this happened, but at one point, in a state of sleep-deprived philosophicality (making up words here because I forget what I was going for), I somehow managed to deduce that infinity was the same as nothingness, and then proceeded to mathematically prove that everything was infinite and taking up the same infinite space - that is to say, no space at all. I wrote it down on the back of a piece of paper somewhere, in blue colored pencil and really terrible handwriting because I was doing it with the lights off, and once in a while I find it while I'm cleaning, but I can never bring myself to throw it out.

Needless to say, when I read it over in the morning it made no sense, especially because I realized that i had forgotten to take into account things being infinitely small, which somehow messed up the whole idea.

I kind of really wish I had the paper with me, because now I can't figure out how it worked at all.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby ACU-LP » Sun Sep 07, 2008 6:28 am UTC

electronic mily wrote:I don't remember exactly how old I was when this happened, but at one point, in a state of sleep-deprived philosophicality (making up words here because I forget what I was going for), I somehow managed to deduce that infinity was the same as nothingness, and then proceeded to mathematically prove that everything was infinite and taking up the same infinite space - that is to say, no space at all. I wrote it down on the back of a piece of paper somewhere, in blue colored pencil and really terrible handwriting because I was doing it with the lights off, and once in a while I find it while I'm cleaning, but I can never bring myself to throw it out.

Needless to say, when I read it over in the morning it made no sense, especially because I realized that i had forgotten to take into account things being infinitely small, which somehow messed up the whole idea.

I kind of really wish I had the paper with me, because now I can't figure out how it worked at all.


Thats a really cool/interesting/screwy/awesome idea. (by screwy I mean it screws with our views and thoughts)

Also, we all seem to make up words here every now and then (or in my case a lot).

Shiyiya, have you only posted here? In the whole fora?

Its interesting how this thread attracts the newbies (I'm a newb myself)
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Red vs Blue wrote:Wash: That was the worst throw ever. Of all time.
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Shiyiya » Sun Sep 07, 2008 4:23 pm UTC

ACU-LP wrote:
Shiyiya, have you only posted here? In the whole fora?

Its interesting how this thread attracts the newbies (I'm a newb myself)


Someone in an IRC channel I was in mentioned how huge the discussion thread on Aversion Fads got, and how quickly, so I went to take a look (I had never clicked the forums button before) and I saw a link to this in a sig and I registered for the sole reason of posting in this thread :P It is indeed the only place I've posted.
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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby Zake » Sun Sep 07, 2008 8:54 pm UTC

I remember, at a sort of eleven-ish age, being really upset by the theory of relativity. What, my idealistic younger self demanded, made the speed of light so special, anyway? There can't just be arbitrary numbers which govern the working of the universe, because there wasn't anything before the universe existed which could have chosen them!

...Suffice to say, since then my notions of a universe without magic numbers has been shattered, or at least severely dented (no one thought, back then, to point out pi to me.) But the above argument still has an unsettling tidbit of weight, I think.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby ACU-LP » Mon Sep 08, 2008 2:21 am UTC

Shiyiya wrote:
ACU-LP wrote:
Shiyiya, have you only posted here? In the whole fora?

Its interesting how this thread attracts the newbies (I'm a newb myself)


Someone in an IRC channel I was in mentioned how huge the discussion thread on Aversion Fads got, and how quickly, so I went to take a look (I had never clicked the forums button before) and I saw a link to this in a sig and I registered for the sole reason of posting in this thread :P It is indeed the only place I've posted.


People pay attention to my sig....yay! :P
I Am Raven wrote:Math is like a penis: it can be very satisfactory, but also a pain in the ass.
Red vs Blue wrote:Wash: That was the worst throw ever. Of all time.
Caboose: Not my fault. Someone put a wall in my way.

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby electronic mily » Mon Sep 08, 2008 3:13 am UTC

ACU-LP wrote:Thats a really cool/interesting/screwy/awesome idea. (by screwy I mean it screws with our views and thoughts)


I'll admit, I actually do still kind of believe it, even if the explanation was majorly faulty. I've got a thing for theories in which things are inside of themselves and stuff - quite recently I was suddenly struck by the thought that I might be a character created in my own imaginary world. I think I just like to be able to think about the same thing for ages and never really get anywhere with it. ;)

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Re: Childhood crackpot theories *EPIC THREAD*

Postby ACU-LP » Mon Sep 08, 2008 10:17 am UTC

electronic mily wrote:
ACU-LP wrote:Thats a really cool/interesting/screwy/awesome idea. (by screwy I mean it screws with our views and thoughts)


I'll admit, I actually do still kind of believe it, even if the explanation was majorly faulty. I've got a thing for theories in which things are inside of themselves and stuff - quite recently I was suddenly struck by the thought that I might be a character created in my own imaginary world. I think I just like to be able to think about the same thing for ages and never really get anywhere with it. ;)


story of my life really. is good though, hence the generation of this thread to share with others. yay
I Am Raven wrote:Math is like a penis: it can be very satisfactory, but also a pain in the ass.
Red vs Blue wrote:Wash: That was the worst throw ever. Of all time.
Caboose: Not my fault. Someone put a wall in my way.


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