Confessional Shed - I'll keep a look-out

Things that don't belong anywhere else. (Check first).

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Alpha Omicron
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Alpha Omicron » Tue Nov 20, 2007 1:53 am UTC

Holy crap I got sigged!
O FRABJOUS DAY!

Confession: I feel guilty for not having included areal confession in this post.
Confession: Only because it started a new page.
Here is a link to a page which leverages aggregation of my tweetbook social blogomedia.

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby elminster » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:01 am UTC

Shabooty wrote:Confession: I found a sticky...

With all this talk about pillow sex, I had a feeling that confession was going to end differently.

Confession: I did just spend a long time writing a reply to coberst's thread, but eventually I realised how pointless it would be. It would be merely mocking a person who doesn't have any decent valid points of his own anyway. On top of that, the style that some of his posts are written in only make it worse. Like the analogy/metaphor post, which made me cringe slightly. It bares resemblance to a reply from an acquaintance who has very little ability to argue (He uses a lot of propaganda, unknowingly most of the time) , yet chooses to be the loudest, most aggressive arguer in any debate (Not that coberst is loud/aggressive, merely pointing out the personality of this guy).
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Gem
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Gem » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:02 am UTC

Confession: I want to corrupt my friend on Leavers. She is so...innocent? I don't know. Her mum controls her life so much, and she never does anything rebellious or anything. Don't get me wrong though, I love her mum, she's such a nice lady, but I think she's way too overprotective. However, I don't know if my friend is corruptible. She doesn't like hot drinks. Or alcohol, so there goes my main means of getting her to do crazy stuff. Does this make me a bad person?

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bbctol
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby bbctol » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:19 am UTC

joeframbach wrote:
Vanguard wrote:Confession: I discovered masterbation with a pillow.


yeah, ditto.

Completely related: http://www.darwinawards.com/stupid/stupid1998-10.html
Confession: that was not me.


At first I thought, "Wow, what an idiot." But think about it. He stapled his ballsack shut and lived.

He stapled his ballsack shut.

The guy's fucking Macgyver!

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Morphing Ball
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Morphing Ball » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:24 am UTC

He is an idiot for masturbating with the drive belt in the first place.

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bbctol
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby bbctol » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:26 am UTC

Morphing Ball wrote:He is an idiot for masturbating with the drive belt in the first place.


I'm not talking about idiocy. I'm talking about manliness. Masturbating with a drive belt is pretty damn manly too.

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schumi_girl
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby schumi_girl » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:26 am UTC

bbctol wrote:
joeframbach wrote:
Vanguard wrote:Confession: I discovered masterbation with a pillow.

The guy's fucking Macgyver!


More like the drive belt..


Adam: "This could be trouble."
Riley: "We'd better make a fort."
Adam: "I'll get some pillows."

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Alpha Omicron
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Alpha Omicron » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:27 am UTC

Confession: I just drank tea I squeezed out of the teabag. Must get concentrated TEA! CAFFFFFFFIEEEEEEEENE!
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Gem
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Gem » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:28 am UTC

You know, coffee's probably better if you want caffeine...

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Aluminus
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Aluminus » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:29 am UTC

Gem wrote:Her mum controls her life so much...
My friend was in this situation:
One day she decided that she was not going to let her mum control her life. She went to a party. Mum says 'be back by midnight' She came back at two in the morning. Her mum said 'if you don't want to live by my rules, you can go elsewhere' She packs up her bag and left that moment. Now she is the happiest I have ever seen her. She enjoys a sambuka now and then as well.
fyrenwater wrote:Oh dear God, I just imagined this horrible scenario of a psychotic non-people-person running around, trying to steal the people-person section of people-peoples' brains to implant into their own brain.

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby pollywog » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:30 am UTC

Took me a while to get that, Schumi.

Wikipedia, on Buck Shelford, wrote:It was during only his second test for the All Blacks that he suffered a ripped scrotum after being rucked by a French player, which left one testicle hanging free. He also lost four teeth during the ruck. After discovering the injury to his scrotum, he calmly asked the physio to stitch up the tear and returned to the field before a blow to his head left him concussed and he left the field and watched the remainder of the game from the grandstand where he witnessed the All Blacks lose.


That's pretty manly.
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Gem
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Gem » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:30 am UTC

See, I don't think my friend is ever going to rebel. She has a really good relationship with her mum and she seems to like her life. I just think it would be fun to corrupt her :P

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Aluminus
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Aluminus » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:32 am UTC

Gem wrote:She has a really good relationship with her mum
Ahhh... see my friend didn't. Mind you I think turning 18 really had a lot to do with it.
fyrenwater wrote:Oh dear God, I just imagined this horrible scenario of a psychotic non-people-person running around, trying to steal the people-person section of people-peoples' brains to implant into their own brain.

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby joeframbach » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:52 am UTC

schumi_girl wrote:
bbctol wrote:
joeframbach wrote:
Vanguard wrote:Confession: I discovered masterbation with a pillow.

The guy's fucking Macgyver!


More like the drive belt..


Yes, it took me a long time to get it, also.
Well-played. I like the way you think.

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Akira
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Akira » Tue Nov 20, 2007 3:44 am UTC

Confession: That was the first time I had watched Ace Ventura: Pet Detective.

I forgot how awesome Jim Carey was. His face is the coolest thing ever. XD
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Vandole » Tue Nov 20, 2007 4:07 am UTC

Confession: I'm getting very random pains in the palm of my right hand. It's definitely not related to any muscles or repetitive strain. It just kinda... stings. Very odd sensation.
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby pollywog » Tue Nov 20, 2007 4:31 am UTC

Stigmata?
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i'm fucking magic

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__Kit
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby __Kit » Tue Nov 20, 2007 4:45 am UTC

Brag: I got 91% in my maths exam, top of the class!
And that's not even the bigger brag of the day.

Confession: I feel guilty for bragging, and don't do so much in real life, but via fora there really is no other way
=]

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby joeframbach » Tue Nov 20, 2007 4:58 am UTC

__Kit wrote:Brag: I got 91% in my maths exam, top of the class!
And that's not even the bigger brag of the day.

Confession: I feel guilty for bragging, and don't do so much in real life, but via fora there really is no other way


Well what happened to the other 9%? huh? You'll amount to nothing in your sad life if you don't go back and earn those points back! If you're not better than the best you're a failure! Go back to your room and study until your eyes bleed.

Confession: My parents were never like that and I am sooo so so so thankful for that.

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby __Kit » Tue Nov 20, 2007 5:26 am UTC

-Gah I just remembered why I posted that, it's because there were two maths competitions this year, that 3 people got invited to each, the same group came second in both, I wasn't invited to the comp. as my teacher probably underestimated me, the three people chosen over me all got around 100/140 on the exam (~70%) and then I got my marks and it was like, kinda smug.
=]

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Phi » Tue Nov 20, 2007 5:40 am UTC

I'm still angry, 4 years later, that my Geometry teacher from 8th grade sent me to Algebra II Freshman year instead of Algebra II/Trigonometry.

I will never forgive her for that, and I will never forgive myself for not overriding her stupid decision. It caused me to waste 2 years of my life doing math I had already known how to do. [Note: Stopping rant here. More than one of you has probably heard this already]

At least, through college I won't forgive for that.

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Live » Tue Nov 20, 2007 1:54 pm UTC

Confession: After a Christian upbringing (sometimes Catholic, sometimes some fundamentalist denomination), I have fairly recently stopped believing in a benevolent/omnipotent god. However, I still have to consciously stop myself from saying small prayers w.r.t. stupid little things that are obviously up to chance.
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Vanguard » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:21 pm UTC

Aleril wrote:
Vanguard wrote:This one is a bit personal for me but screw it, I'm in a good mood so why not post it.

Confession: I discovered masterbation with a pillow.


Isnt that just pillow fucking instead of masterbation?


I thought about that, too. It probably is.
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Prole » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:31 pm UTC

Vanguard wrote:
Aleril wrote:
Vanguard wrote:This one is a bit personal for me but screw it, I'm in a good mood so why not post it.

Confession: I discovered masterbation with a pillow.


Isnt that just pillow fucking instead of masterbation?


I thought about that, too. It probably is.


If Its not live, its aided masterbation.

Did you cuddle afterwards?
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Vanguard » Tue Nov 20, 2007 2:48 pm UTC

I think I slept on it. I was too young to produce sperm so it was clean and dry.
If I didn't sleep on it I probably just threw it on the floor.
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby SecondTalon » Tue Nov 20, 2007 3:14 pm UTC

Confession Every time I see d33p's signature, I start to giggle to myself...

Until I realize I'm giggling at something I said. Then I feel stupid. Then I giggle some more.
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Dxh » Tue Nov 20, 2007 3:45 pm UTC

CONFESSION: I have really bad acne on my back, and I'm well past the age when most people have problems. Not only that, but I already had my wave of acne from puberty. I think it has something to do with the fact that I swam competitively for eight years, and the last two, I haven't. Maybe my skin is experiencing withdrawal from the chlorine burn... Is that even possible?

CONFESSION: I haven't masterbated in weeks.

I don't know why I said that.
Last edited by Dxh on Tue Nov 20, 2007 3:55 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby xndrew » Tue Nov 20, 2007 3:52 pm UTC

@Dxh: The skin can be set off by the tiniest of things, and chlorine is no small thing. Go see a dermatologist if it's really bad, they'd be able to tell you a lot more than I could.

Confession: I want to go into the XKCD chat, but I'm afraid to for no reason I can discern.

Confession: I can't wait to get the hell out of upstate New York, if only for a couple of days. This place is killing me and killing my liver. (Actually, I'm killing my liver, but the lack of people willing to do things here is killing me.)

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby ivnja » Tue Nov 20, 2007 7:23 pm UTC

Confession: It's snowing and I'm inside watching it through the window of my dorm room and I just finished a wonderful cup of spiced pumpkin flavored coffee and I'm just having a splendid day, and while reading through this thread I felt somewhat guilty about that, like..."what right do I have to feel happy while Dhx's back is erupting and xndrew is stuck with a dying liver in upstate New York?"

Confession: Shortly after thinking that, I realized, Screw it, it's snowing and I'm happy. Total lack of empathy FTW! :P
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby atxshannon » Tue Nov 20, 2007 7:25 pm UTC

confession: i really want to hit someone.
Orson Welles wrote:I hate television. I hate it as much as peanuts. But I can't stop eating peanuts.

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby b.i.o » Tue Nov 20, 2007 7:26 pm UTC

Confession: I'm at college and I really don't feel like I'll ever want to go home.

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby ivnja » Tue Nov 20, 2007 7:46 pm UTC

Silver2Falcon wrote:Confession: I'm at college and I really don't feel like I'll ever want to go home.

oh, don't worry, you will. even when you love your college, you'll want a break at some point.
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(╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ » Tue Nov 20, 2007 7:50 pm UTC

No, not necessarily. I never wanted to go home. I went home for a month between leaving school and finding an apartment. It was a month of hell.


Confession: I am mind-numbingly bored and I just want to sleep, but I have two more hours of work. I'm trying to figure out how to look like I'm working.
Heyyy baby wanna kill all humans?

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Will » Tue Nov 20, 2007 8:14 pm UTC

ivnja wrote:
Silver2Falcon wrote:Confession: I'm at college and I really don't feel like I'll ever want to go home.

oh, don't worry, you will. even when you love your college, you'll want a break at some point.


I've been in college for 4 1/2 years and at no point have I ever wanted to go home. Have a break from school? Absolutely. Spend that break with my family? God no. I'm quite happy living on my own, thank you.
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Zohar » Tue Nov 20, 2007 8:27 pm UTC

ivnja wrote:Confession: Shortly after thinking that, I realized, Screw it, it's snowing and I'm happy. Total lack of empathy FTW! :P


I don't have any problem with that. Sure, some people have it tough, but everyone has it tough, relative to themselves... If you feel good, feel good. As long as you don't hurt others, do what you want. If later you feel more empathic, that's fine as well, though not necessary.
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Cassi » Tue Nov 20, 2007 8:49 pm UTC

Confession: As much as I like everyone who usually comes in the AIM chat, new people would be fun too! Especially any who come in when I'm actually online.

Confession: I only put that as a confession (even though it clearly isn't) because I've decided to try to stop posting non-confessions in the confessional thread.

Confession: I don't think it's going to work, because I always cheat on these sorts of things I set for myself. (As I've already shown.)
une see wrote:Cass, YOU are my favorite!

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby Aluminus » Tue Nov 20, 2007 8:56 pm UTC

Confession: I do not know exactly what AIM stands for.
Confession: Every time I ride the train. My loneliness comes back. I have no choice but to ride the train however.
Confession: I try to sleep on the train. But it only makes the ride seem twice as long. It takes me two hours to get home as it is.
Confession: The thought of the thousands of confessions that remain unread on this thread makes me wince.
fyrenwater wrote:Oh dear God, I just imagined this horrible scenario of a psychotic non-people-person running around, trying to steal the people-person section of people-peoples' brains to implant into their own brain.

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ivnja
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby ivnja » Tue Nov 20, 2007 9:02 pm UTC

Will wrote:
ivnja wrote:
Silver2Falcon wrote:Confession: I'm at college and I really don't feel like I'll ever want to go home.

oh, don't worry, you will. even when you love your college, you'll want a break at some point.


I've been in college for 4 1/2 years and at no point have I ever wanted to go home. Have a break from school? Absolutely. Spend that break with my family? God no. I'm quite happy living on my own, thank you.

Very true
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d33p
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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby d33p » Tue Nov 20, 2007 9:18 pm UTC

SecondTalon wrote:Confession Every time I see d33p's signature, I start to giggle to myself...

Until I realize I'm giggling at something I said. Then I feel stupid. Then I giggle some more.


I must say, I had hoped that a confession involving me would be more... illicit.

Confession: After much internal debate, I am glad Cowboy stopped me from making out with that barpig. Sleeping in the cold car > waking up next to a horror.
Parka wrote:I assume this is yours. I don't know anyone else who would put "kill a bear" on a list.

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Re: Confessional Thread

Postby The Spherical Cow » Tue Nov 20, 2007 10:34 pm UTC

Cassi wrote:Confession: As much as I like everyone who usually comes in the AIM chat, new people would be fun too! Especially any who come in when I'm actually online.

How would one go about gaining access to said chat?


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