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Oregonaut
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Oregonaut » Fri Sep 17, 2010 5:59 pm UTC

There is a specific species of slug in the area I live in that is almost completely translucent. It is odd how they manage to thrive, because as soon as November hits, they are found dead, or are being eaten by the local ravens.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby podbaydoor » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:06 pm UTC

One of my most vivid childhood memories is dashing full speed down a trail at Olympia state park, rounding a corner, and coming face-to-face with a banana slug that I swear must have been as long as my arm. It was going straight up a fence, hence being at face level. I guess it was almost beautiful in its repulsiveness.

The day we learned about slug sex in biology was an uncomfortable day, though hilarious in retrospect.
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

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Oregonaut
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Oregonaut » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:08 pm UTC

Yeah, they can get *really* long, especially when they stretch out to move. Which is largely why I don't want them in my bloody garage climbing all over my gear.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby podbaydoor » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:12 pm UTC

Also, they squish when you step on them. *shudder*
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby pseudoidiot » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:19 pm UTC

Speaking of bugs. A couple weeks ago my wife & I were out and about. Doing errands. Whatever. We got in the car from our most recent outing and there was a grasshopper on the windshield. We didn't want to knock it off with the wipers in case it hurt it. So she just started driving. We figured it'd jump off when the car started going to fast and it'd be okay.

She pulls out of the parking lot and it's still on the windshield.
Going down the road, picking up speed. 40, 45 mph. Still on the windshield.
Picking up speed on the on-ramp getting onto the interstate. Still there.
Driving down the interstate. 70. 75 mph. Still holding on.
Slow down as we exit the interstate 7 miles later. Still there.
Pull in at the gas station to fill up the tank. At some point while stopped he decides his trip is over.

That was a pretty hardcore grasshopper.
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Oregonaut
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Oregonaut » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:22 pm UTC

Yeah, ok. Rant time. Time to put on the Rant Pants.

I think we should all go on a team retrea- BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ
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No. No we should not. The only reason you all still live is because I am a fucking PARAGON of control. My willingness to work here is only a reflection of the current economic situation of the United States. If you, for one picasecond, think I like any of you, you are VERY VERY mistaken. I am not interested in being friends with a single one of you. Period. End of report. Have a nice god damn day.

Pseudoidiot you are still under house arrest.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby pseudoidiot » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:24 pm UTC

What if I bribe my way out?

Spoiler:
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Oregonaut » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:30 pm UTC

Well...four pounds of Twizzlers should be sufficient to remove your constraints and allow you to leave. Just remember, I have my eyes on you.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby PictureSarah » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:39 pm UTC

I can't seem to get off of the slug thing.
When I was a kid we were hiking in Jedediah Smith Redwoods State Park, and I was zooming along the trail, much as Podbay described. I came around a corner, dashed across a little wooden footbridge, and...skidded across the entire (about 12 foot long) bridge. On a slug. I smeared it the length of the bridge. I felt so incredibly disgusted, not to mention guilty.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby podbaydoor » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:44 pm UTC

:shock:

That's no mean feat. I feel certain that my habit of looking down and watching my feet while walking the woods is borne out of many hours of playing the forest while being paranoid about squishing on slugs.
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Oregonaut » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:45 pm UTC

I was on a long excursion while undergoing training at Fairchild AFB, and had left my pack open after having pulled my K-Bar out of it to lash together some shelter, I came back to it, to pull out my helmet, and found a slug curled up on itself inside. I kept salt sprinkled in my backpack for luck, the poor thing had shriveled on the salt after it had landed inside the helmet.

I was sad.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Dave_Wise » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:48 pm UTC

That obnoxious woman who thinks masturbation is a sin. I mean, WTF America?
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Oregonaut » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:52 pm UTC

C'mon dude, it's America FUCK yeah, not America MASTURBATION yeah. Seriously.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Dave_Wise » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:53 pm UTC

Yeah, but she's a senator, and it's not just the masturbation thing, either...
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Torvaun » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:55 pm UTC

So, that Vancouver Acid Attack was self-mutilation. And now every actual victim of random attacks is going to be questioned a little bit more. Because police didn't have enough reasons to ignore the people they're supposed to serve and protect.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Oregonaut » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:56 pm UTC

...C'mon man, I'm trying to make a joke here. Work with me.

Anyway, I've long since stopped having faith in our elected officials. Until one is elected that agrees with my spiritual views, I'm never going to receive adequate representation.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby podbaydoor » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:56 pm UTC

Dave_Wise wrote:Yeah, but she's a senator, and it's not just the masturbation thing, either...

We were founded by the Puritans that you Brits chased out. Does that explain it?
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Kewangji » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:57 pm UTC

When I accidentally kill things I think 'I'm sorry' really loudly and hope the little thing would forgive me.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Dave_Wise » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:58 pm UTC

Sorry, mate. Couldn't see which way the joke was going.
But... but... I thought it was OK to like America again now that Barrack Obama is president. Turns out there's a deep layer of rightwing unpleasantness only just under the surface. Makes me sad, is all.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Oregonaut » Fri Sep 17, 2010 6:59 pm UTC

PBD is right, the Puritanism still abides within the culture, which is sad-making.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby podbaydoor » Fri Sep 17, 2010 8:35 pm UTC

Oregonaut wrote:...C'mon man, I'm trying to make a joke here. Work with me.

Anyway, I've long since stopped having faith in our elected officials. Until one is elected that agrees with my spiritual views, I'm never going to receive adequate representation.

This reminds me of a rant I've had stored up since yesterday.

Yesterday I was at the 2010 Missouri Governor’s Conference on Economic Development. I'm filming it for my job, they're gathering for the luncheon during which there will be speeches and awards. One of the organizers gets up and calls everyone to their seats to get settled down, they're on a schedule, whatever. Then, she says, "Now let us bow our heads and pray."

And then, "Heavenly Father." And so on. Calling for blessings on the food and protection of the military and on and on.

I couldn't believe my ears. There are people of different genders, ethnicities, economic status, agendas, education level...hundreds in this room, here for the state conference. A state official. Public prayer without so much as a by-your-leave or acknowledgement that, I don't know, someone might not have any truck with that and doesn't appreciate the expectation that this here is of course a Nation Under Gawd? Fuck. That.

I literally facepalmed. And then settled for folding my arms and staring stony-faced at the public official during the prayer. I hoped someone noticed, I was in the middle of the room elevated on the media platform.
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Oregonaut » Fri Sep 17, 2010 8:39 pm UTC

I hate stuff like that. REALLY hate stuff like that. Public endorsement of religion without even a minor genuflection at the separation of powers is something that bothers me greatly.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby podbaydoor » Fri Sep 17, 2010 8:46 pm UTC

Also, I hope someone heard the "what the hell??" muttering that I let out at the beginning out of surprise. It wasn't very loud, but it wasn't quite at a whisper, either.

I mean, I'm in Missouri. I'm around politicians all the time, and they both cater to and are a part of a still mostly rural constituency that is squarely inside the Bible Belt. I get that, I get the constant nonchalant references to "church" and "God and country." They live in a world where everyone talks like that, so it's no big deal. But for pete's sake, an outright enforced mass prayer? You. Are. Doing. It. Wrong.
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Kang » Fri Sep 17, 2010 9:01 pm UTC

podbaydoor wrote:Also, I hope someone heard the "what the hell??" muttering that I let out at the beginning out of surprise. It wasn't very loud, but it wasn't quite at a whisper, either.

I mean, I'm in Missouri. I'm around politicians all the time, and they both cater to and are a part of a still mostly rural constituency that is squarely inside the Bible Belt. I get that, I get the constant nonchalant references to "church" and "God and country." They live in a world where everyone talks like that, so it's no big deal. But for pete's sake, an outright enforced mass prayer? You. Are. Doing. It. Wrong.

I guess they wouldn't like it if you demonstratively prayed according to another religion, would they?

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby podbaydoor » Fri Sep 17, 2010 9:31 pm UTC

Yeah, I doubt it. Like I said, Bible Belt.
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby The Scyphozoa » Fri Sep 17, 2010 11:30 pm UTC

Kewangji wrote:When I accidentally kill things I think 'I'm sorry' really loudly and hope the little thing would forgive me.

I sure hope it isn't Agrajag.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Kewangji » Fri Sep 17, 2010 11:59 pm UTC

The Scyphozoa wrote:
Kewangji wrote:When I accidentally kill things I think 'I'm sorry' really loudly and hope the little thing would forgive me.

I sure hope it isn't Agrajag.

Oh... oh shit. D:
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Ashlah » Sat Sep 18, 2010 3:56 am UTC

Dave_Wise wrote:Yeah, but she's a senator, and it's not just the masturbation thing, either...

It's scary that she's gotten as far as she has, but she is not (yet, at least) a senator. Assuming you're talking about Christine O'Donnell. She won the Republican primary in Delaware, and is their candidate for Senate in November. She makes me rage so hard as well, but hopefully it makes you feel a teensy bit better that she isn't actually quite in power. And hopefully it stays that way.

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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby GraphiteGirl » Sat Sep 18, 2010 5:09 am UTC

Christine O'Donnell quotes, this one from 2002:
O’DONNELL: The sad reality is — yes, there is something you can do about it. And the sad reality, to tell them slap on a condom is not

(CROSSTALK)

NIES: You’re going to stop the whole country from having sex?

O’DONNELL: Yes.


On the slug topic, I always used to think the snails in our front garden were rather cute, and liked the trails of slime they left on the front path. Used to try to stroke their shells.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Dave_Wise » Sat Sep 18, 2010 10:44 am UTC

Assuming you're talking about Christine O'Donnell

That's the one. Well, thank god they're not in power that's all I can say.

Having said that, we have our own assholes in government. I can't even summon up any anger about it any more, I'm just resigned to the shitbaggery.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Briareos » Sat Sep 18, 2010 12:12 pm UTC

Dave_Wise wrote:
Assuming you're talking about Christine O'Donnell

That's the one. Well, thank god they're not in power that's all I can say.
In fact, when she won the primary, the Delaware senate seat moved from "possible Republican pickup" to "likely Democratic hold."
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Ulc » Sat Sep 18, 2010 4:39 pm UTC

GAH

Why do tourists insist on being that stupid?

Look, I know it's my job to service you, but when I tell you that I don't understand your language (yes, danish and swedish are glose enough that most danes can understand swedes, but I'm not good at languages, so I can't), don't fucking repeat it more loudly, switch to English like I asked you to.

And no, repeating it more and more loudly is NOT going to help, in fact, it's only going to annoy me.

Bloody idiots the lot of them.

Edit: I explained it half an hour ago. How hard can it possible be to understand that I don't fucking understand your language?
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Thesh » Sat Sep 18, 2010 5:50 pm UTC

It's funny, most people I meet here in california that are republicans, are really more libertarian when you start talking to them: in favor of abortion, want smaller government, etc. Too bad we are stuck with the system where the choice is between right wing totalitarian candidates and righter wing totalitarian candidates with a few issues thrown in between them. It would be nice if the representatives and senators more closely represented the views of their constituents. I wonder if there would be a way to change the system to bring it closer to that.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby The Scyphozoa » Sat Sep 18, 2010 7:52 pm UTC

Thesh wrote:It's funny, most people I meet here in california that are republicans, are really more libertarian when you start talking to them: in favor of abortion, want smaller government, etc. Too bad we are stuck with the system where the choice is between right wing totalitarian candidates and righter wing totalitarian candidates with a few issues thrown in between them. It would be nice if the representatives and senators more closely represented the views of their constituents. I wonder if there would be a way to change the system to bring it closer to that.

The answer is to run for office to represent your own views. :D
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby bigglesworth » Sat Sep 18, 2010 7:53 pm UTC

*Cough firstpastthepost cough*
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Whelan » Sat Sep 18, 2010 8:06 pm UTC

Hehe, the PR referendum is next year, after I turn 18.
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Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby e^iπ+1=0 » Sat Sep 18, 2010 9:07 pm UTC

Gah, fasting
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OBrien
Posts: 1478
Joined: Thu Jan 22, 2009 3:05 pm UTC
Location: 1 Bimini Road, downtown Atlantis

Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby OBrien » Sat Sep 18, 2010 9:09 pm UTC

Fucking Tories.
Spelling and grammar can go screw themselves.

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Whelan
Posts: 2214
Joined: Sun Jan 18, 2009 1:16 pm UTC
Location: Londonshire.

Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby Whelan » Sat Sep 18, 2010 9:25 pm UTC

Don't, you'll most likely catch something nasty.
"I like to be understood whenever I open my mouth; I have a horror of blinding people with science"- Richard Dawkins
Weeks wrote:
TaintedDeity wrote:And all I get is this tame space dragon. Where's my recognition?!
A tame dragon is its own reward.

hemhhr
Posts: 84
Joined: Wed Aug 04, 2010 6:19 pm UTC

Re: Rant Thread - The Spies of Faith

Postby hemhhr » Sun Sep 19, 2010 1:44 am UTC

*wailing*

I WANT MORE DAISY OWL!

*gnashing of teeth*


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