Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

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SneakyMongo
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Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby SneakyMongo » Fri Jun 20, 2008 3:30 am UTC

My computer is currently in the middle of a virus attack. And by virus attack I mean if not for the sheer unlikeliness of the event and it having happened before, a near-prank.
For you see...this virus has a sense of humor.

Moments after restarting my computer, my internet turns itself functionally off. Unless, of course, I activate 16 internet explorer windows. I normally have that many or more as per the perpetual windowy doom that afflicts the wiki/IE user, so I could've had this virus as long as several months without knowing.
The windows themselves can be set to anything and the virus is content (naturally I'm trying to set each to a different perversion to bug out the snoopy). They don't even need to be active or refreshed. Just open.
Intensive internet activity in a few browsers and/or massive uploading/downloading dosen't appease the Virus god, so it isn't merely network activity that's the key.

What's more, this is no the first time this has happened. Perhaps its the Calvin and Hobbes archice I download every full reset, or the NIN discography? Who can tell!
I've got Avast set up for the death knell so in all likelihood assistance will not be required.

So I guess I gotta throw this out here.
Have you ever had a funny virus?


Although I would've liked some hints about the "solution" I guess overall, this was an enjoyable experience.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby BazookaNinja » Fri Jun 20, 2008 4:25 am UTC

one time a virus killed my entire family and took my house

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Upsilon » Fri Jun 20, 2008 4:28 am UTC

I can see the humor in that.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby 4=5 » Fri Jun 20, 2008 4:54 am UTC

that's a pretty funny idea,
how did you discover the solution?

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby SneakyMongo » Fri Jun 20, 2008 5:02 am UTC

BazookaNinja wrote:one time a virus killed my entire family and took my house


Cain: My punishment is too harsh! All men who see me will slay me!
God: Then whoever kills Cain will suffer venegance sevenfold, and I shall place a mark on you such that all will know this.
Cain: Can I have something to eat for the trip?
God: I made you a pack lunch, it's in your napsack
-Bible, Retcon'd



4=5 wrote:that's a pretty funny idea,
how did you discover the solution?


I was researching world of darkness when the virus originally hit so I had 10 or so links with all their branchs. So I copied all URLs I wanted to visit to a notepad, restarted and before the virus took the internet offline quickly opened a huge number of browsers and started inserting URLs so that when the internet did go out I'd have plenty to read before I'd have to reboot again.
Low-and-behold, it didn't go out. As I was closing off the browsers (because world of darkness is interesting for exactly .5 hours) and it turned off. 1 experiment later and I'd confirmed the solution.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Millah » Fri Jun 20, 2008 3:37 pm UTC

I like the virus that turns your desktop into a puzzle that you have to solve before you can use the computer again.

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Cornelius » Fri Jun 20, 2008 4:14 pm UTC

It might just be an internet explorer virus.

Try installing Firefox.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Quadropus » Fri Jun 20, 2008 6:47 pm UTC

Cornelius wrote:It might just be internet explorer virus.

Try installing Firefox.

Fix'd.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby PatrickRsGhost » Fri Jun 20, 2008 6:54 pm UTC

Quadropus wrote:
Cornelius wrote:It might just be is internet explorer virus.

Try installing Get Firefox.

Fix'd.


Fix'd again.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby DYRE » Fri Jun 20, 2008 7:46 pm UTC

PatrickRsGhost wrote:
Quadropus wrote:
Cornelius wrote:Itmight just be is internet explorervirus.

Try installing Get Firefox. whether or not it was just Internet Explorer. NAO!

Fix'd.


Fix'd again.

Fix'd yet again.

*is actually an Opera user*

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby TizzyFoe » Fri Jun 20, 2008 8:15 pm UTC

DYRE wrote:
PatrickRsGhost wrote:
Quadropus wrote:
Cornelius wrote:Itmight just be is internet explorervirus.

Try installing Get Firefox. whether or not it was just Internet Explorer. NAO!

Fix'd.


Fix'd again.

Fix'd yet again.

*is actually an Opera user being different just for the sake of being different and should use firefox*


fixed yet again again
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby LE4dGOLEM » Fri Jun 20, 2008 9:04 pm UTC

SO HOW BOUT THEM VIRI EH?
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Neuman » Fri Jun 20, 2008 11:43 pm UTC

WHY ARE WE SHOUTING?

All my viri are annoying rather than humorous. In short, I have nothing to contribute. I sincerely apologize.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Upsilon » Fri Jun 20, 2008 11:55 pm UTC

Neuman wrote:WHY ARE WE SHOUTING? I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!

Fix'd

Also: LOUD NOISES!

Anyway,
Neuman wrote:All my viri are annoying rather than humorous. In short, I have nothing to contribute. I sincerely apologize.
pretty much sums up what I was going to say.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby asanisimasa » Sat Jun 21, 2008 1:22 am UTC

Upsilon wrote:
Neuman wrote:I have nothing to contribute. I sincerely apologize.
pretty much sums up what I was going to say.


That pretty much sums up this entire thread.

I've never really had any noticeable viruses for years. I don't think I'd be too happy with any kind of virus, no matter how "funny" it may be. OP's "virus" (aka IE) seems more annoying than funny.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby jmrz » Sat Jun 21, 2008 2:43 am UTC

I own two macs, so I haven't really had to deal with any of that in a while. Even when I did run windows, I always had some variation of antivirus and firewall running so I never managed to get any bad/amusing/hilarious viruses.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Mr. Beck » Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:30 am UTC

Yarp, I'm running running Firefox with firewall+antivirus+antispyware running 24/7. No Viri for me!

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Minchandre » Sat Jun 21, 2008 5:49 am UTC

jmrz wrote:I own two macsam a consumer whore, so I haven't really had to deal with any of that in a while. Even when I did run windows, I always had some variation of antivirus and firewall running wasn't a complete idiot so I never managed to get any bad/amusing/hilarious viruses.


Fix'd.

On the original topic, back when I was still running DOS when I was a fetus, I remember getting a virus that made an ambulance go across my screen while really bad midi-based siren noise played over the integrated speakers. This happened once, never did anything ever again. A friend of mine claims to have gotten a virus that threw an error message about breaking Sabbath every time he tried to use it of Saturday, but I never saw it myself.

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby SneakyMongo » Sat Jun 21, 2008 6:13 am UTC

asanisimasa wrote:
Upsilon wrote:
Neuman wrote:I OP's "virus" (aka IE) seems more annoying than funny.


I liked the puzzles in the old pokemon games so what'd'ya know eh?
I'm a glutton for mystery.



On the IE vs. Firefox issue, I don't notice any real difference except Firefox is slower. If all three were of equal speed though, I'd use Opera as it offers features I've salivated over (I loves you....actually logical navigation system )
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby sethicus » Sat Jun 21, 2008 2:09 pm UTC

Minchandre wrote:
jmrz wrote:I own two macsam a consumer whore, so I haven't really had to deal with any of that in a while. Even when I did run windows, I always had some variation of antivirus and firewall running wasn't a complete idiot so I never managed to get any bad/amusing/hilarious viruses.


Fix'd.

On the original topic, back when I was still running DOS when I was a fetus, I remember getting a virus that made an ambulance go across my screen while really bad midi-based siren noise played over the integrated speakers. This happened once, never did anything ever again. A friend of mine claims to have gotten a virus that threw an error message about breaking Sabbath every time he tried to use it of Saturday, but I never saw it myself.


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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Ansible » Sun Jun 22, 2008 7:16 pm UTC

I want to see a virus that plays "Daisy Bell" when you try to delete it.

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby benjhuey » Sun Jun 22, 2008 7:26 pm UTC

I had a virus wipe my hard drive. It was freakin' hilarious!!!
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby The Hyphenator » Sun Jun 22, 2008 11:35 pm UTC

The only virus I ever remember getting was that one that played random sounds. That was a bugger to delete, but was kind of funny, in a way.

That said, I've tried to make a humorous virus before, but got too annoyed by the Windows API coupled with my lack of coding 1337, and gave up.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Unicyclist » Mon Jun 23, 2008 2:07 am UTC

A friend of mine convinced me to copy some scripts into text pads and then run them. I ended up listening to the star wars theme song for a few months whenever my computer booted. Then I reformatted, and it isn't an issue. I've never had a real virus; I just keep a good firewall, anti-virus/spyware constantly active and use firefox when browsing.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Poochy » Tue Jun 24, 2008 4:17 am UTC

This isn't firsthand experience (pretty much the only firsthand experience I get is when other people ask me to fix their computers), but my cousin once told me of a virus that supposedly pops up a prompt to play Rock-Paper-Scissors. If you win, the virus deletes itself.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby SneakyMongo » Tue Jun 24, 2008 8:41 am UTC

Well the virus got it's ass kicked by Avast twice, and then denied by Windows default firewall.

Still....I can't help but miss the little guy.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Mr. Beck » Tue Jun 24, 2008 10:27 pm UTC

SneakyMongo wrote:Well the virus got it's ass kicked by Avast twice, and then denied by Windows default firewall.

Still....I can't help but miss the little guy.

Build it a home!

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Ramses IV » Tue Jun 24, 2008 10:37 pm UTC

Mr. Beck wrote:
SneakyMongo wrote:Well the virus got it's ass kicked by Avast twice, and then denied by Windows default firewall.

Still....I can't help but miss the little guy.

Build it a home!


You know, I really like that comic. It's funny. But I've always wondered, is it possible? Could you set up something like that?
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby cwoodin » Tue Jun 24, 2008 11:17 pm UTC

My roommate and I were copying games/music from each other (completely legal, of course), and I picked up in his "installer" folder a little guy called pwnt.exe

It just copied itself into the startup folder and kicked up a window that said "haha you got a virus"
When you closed the window, it opened up two more. And two more.

After looking at the task manager, I closed it, removed the bugger from startup and suggested he give them all their own processes. Last I heard, a few friends were still frantically clicking to close the windows.

Not really that nasty, but I finally learned to start asking what files were before I copied them from his computer.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Unicyclist » Wed Jun 25, 2008 3:56 am UTC

Mr. Beck wrote:Build it a home!


After reading that comic, I remembered that I had gotten the blaster virus. It wasn't serious though...
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby EdgarJPublius » Wed Jun 25, 2008 7:11 am UTC

the last virus I got killed to Macs and moved on to my PC via my iPod, in the process wiping out every computer and removable storage that had my film project on it except the original mini-tape (pretty much just the two macs, the iPod and my PC). After that, I invested some time in turning my computer into a fortress against internet evil and haven't had a problem since.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby nyeguy » Thu Jun 26, 2008 6:12 am UTC

EdgarJPublius wrote:the last virus I got killed to Macs and moved on to my PC via my iPod, in the process wiping out every computer and removable storage that had my film project on it except the original mini-tape (pretty much just the two macs, the iPod and my PC). After that, I invested some time in turning my computer into a fortress against internet evil and haven't had a problem since.

Can't you just back it up?
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby abrenecki » Thu Jun 26, 2008 11:23 am UTC

How could one virus kill both Macs and (I presume Windows) PCs? They're completely different, and until recently even ran on different processor architectures. Besides, there's only been 2 reported viruses for Mac OS X in 8 years AFAIK. Unless the Macs were all Intel Macs and the PC ran a Unix-like OS, I suppose it's plausible. But I'm a web developer, what would I know?

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Tenth Speed Writer » Thu Jun 26, 2008 3:54 pm UTC

I once had a virus whose sole job was to break Firefox 2.

I don't know quite why. I routed the sob eventually, but I couldn't download anything with FF until I got v3.
It was.. kind of strange.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby EdgarJPublius » Fri Jun 27, 2008 7:35 am UTC

nyeguy wrote:
EdgarJPublius wrote:snip

Can't you just back it up?


yeah, except by killing two macs and an iPod, it killed all three of my backups for the PC >.>
These days everything worth backing up is on a flash drive, backed up regularly to a desktop, a laptop, a portable hard-drive, an iPod, and periodically burned to DVD. the really important stuff is backed-up to Gmail and filedropper as well


abrenecki: it puzzles me as well, there have been cross-platform viruses so it might have been one of those, or a twofer package of different viruses to attack different OSes. More likely one of the computers picked up a Mac virus and PC virus from the same untrustworthy site and the iPod spread it to the other two.
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby J Spade » Mon Jun 30, 2008 3:33 pm UTC

I run a mac, so it was funny when I accidentally downloaded a windows virus. I looked at it, scoffed, dropped it in the trash, and said "sayonara" as I emptied the trash.

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby tmcfulton » Mon Jun 30, 2008 10:13 pm UTC

Wait... "Virus?" What? My Ubuntu doesn't understand that word.

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby hestia » Tue Jul 01, 2008 7:00 pm UTC

I work for a certain computer repair company owned by a certain big box electronics retail store so I get to see LOTS of viruses. My favorite so far is one that turns the desktop red with a nuclear symbol and says "your PC is infected!" or something along those lines.
There are quite a few like that though, I just like when viruses announce themselves like that and the customer thinks that it is some new anti virus that they don't remember downloading but think: look! It found the virus! I don't need any real protection! It says it only needs $30 to keep me protected!
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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby TomatoBlue » Tue Jul 01, 2008 8:27 pm UTC

I once had a virus that would slowly fill the screen with a tiled 8-bit GIF of a dancing purple monkey every time you put a CD in. I sometimes wish I still had it.

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Re: Funny (haha, not quirky) Viruses

Postby Griffin » Tue Jul 01, 2008 10:01 pm UTC

I remember my cousin got a virus that abused active-x, setting up a fake desktop on top of his real one with the message "Error Detected: You are going to die" or something. That was hilarious, because they came running to me claiming "My computer is threatening to kill me! You need to fix it!"
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