The Spider (Image) From Hell

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby rnew » Thu Dec 18, 2008 12:58 pm UTC

FUCK. THAT. SHIT.

Looking at that, all I can think of is the film Cloverfield
Spoiler:
cloverfield-monster.jpeg
cloverfield-monster.jpeg (56.68 KiB) Viewed 4159 times
including the swarm of littluns

EDIT: I'm glad I pogetopped with those three words
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Aikanaro » Thu Dec 18, 2008 1:53 pm UTC

To those who claim that these things are proof of the nonexistence of God, I disagree....I call them proof of the existence of SATAN.

Never trust anything that needs a live victim in order to feed. Combine this with the creepy webs, and too many legs, and the fact that every damn species of spider has venom, and you have a critter that's just evil all around.

Oh, and I agree with whoever said that snakes are awesome. Snakes realized that people get creeped out by too many legs, so they decided to try and not freak folks out, but went a bit too far the other way.
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Re: The Spide (Image) From Hell

Postby Spuddly » Thu Dec 18, 2008 1:56 pm UTC

Jack Saladin wrote:Doesn't even look like a particularly small bird.

Oh, and speaking of horrible spider images, has anyone seen that animated gif with the girls in the foreground? Worst fucking thing ever. You'll know what I mean if you've seen it.

Edit: Those orb weavers can actually look quite cool. Spiders like these are alright.

Image


I think those are in the genus Nephila. I fed a small lizard to one once. The lizard turned this horrible black color as the spider liquified its insides and sucked it dry. I don't know where the video of it went, though.
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Jebobek » Thu Dec 18, 2008 2:23 pm UTC

Personally I like the Garfield strips of him whacking spiders:
Spoiler:
Happy fun times.PNG
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Happy fun times2.PNG
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Happy fun times3.PNG
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Happy fun times4.PNG
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Happy fun times5.PNG
Happy fun times5.PNG (214.72 KiB) Viewed 4091 times
Oh wait thats the bird-eating-spider image :D
Image

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Of Negligible Mass » Thu Dec 18, 2008 2:33 pm UTC

So Jebokek's a bad person...

I'm with the crowd which would could call in an airstrike on that motherfucker. The hell with the house, no one is safe whilst that thing lives.
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Themata » Thu Dec 18, 2008 3:18 pm UTC

Jebobek wrote:Personally I like the Garfield strips of him whacking spiders:
Spoiler:
Happy fun times.PNG
Happy fun times2.PNG
Happy fun times3.PNG
Happy fun times4.PNG
Happy fun times5.PNG
Oh wait thats the bird-eating-spider image :D


You bastard. Ahahahahaha. At least I laughed.

As an arachnaphobe, Australia SUCKS.

Lets see... We have that big mother in the OP....

THIS:

Spoiler:
White Tailed Spider...Image

Wikipedia wrote:By comparison with other well-known Australian spiders, white-tailed spiders do not appear to be particularly numerous, but may be responsible for a disproportionately high number of spider-bites because of their habits. Unlike the black house spider and the redback which are often seen in or around dwellings in a web, the white-tailed spider wanders around and may be encountered unexpectedly. Of the 130 recently-monitored cases, several spiders had been picked up off the floor accidentally by short sighted persons thinking that they were something else. More than 60% of the victims had been bitten by spiders that had got into clothing, into folded towels and into beds. In several more cases they were in shoes.


THIS:

Spoiler:
Funnel Web Spider...Image

Wikipedia wrote:Funnel-webs are one of the three most dangerous spiders in the world and are regarded by some to be the most dangerous.[3]

Examination of bite records seems to indicate that wandering males have caused a large majority of fatal bites to humans; however, this has not been proven. Males, recognized by the modified terminal segment of the palp, are aggressive and tend to wander during the warmer months of the year looking for receptive females of their kind for mating.[4] They are attracted to water and hence are often found in swimming pools where they have fallen while wandering. The spiders can survive such immersion for several hours and can deliver a bite when removed from the water.[5]. They also show up in garages and yards in suburban Sydney. Contrary to the commonly held belief[citation needed], no funnel-web spider is able to jump, although they can run swiftly.


Not to mention our damn dangerous snakes as well... Crocodiles, Sharks, Blue-Ringed Octopi, Box Jellyfish, pretty much everything here is venomous. Safe to say that surviving in Australia makes you a MAN.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby rnew » Thu Dec 18, 2008 3:37 pm UTC

Aikanaro wrote:....I call them proof of the existence of SATAN.
Spoiler:
2647719041_46638dcfdd.jpeg
2647719041_46638dcfdd.jpeg (56.86 KiB) Viewed 3978 times
That's definitely a skull on that spider's back.
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Izawwlgood » Thu Dec 18, 2008 5:01 pm UTC

I've always been really impressed with spiders. Really.
To have your mind exploded, watch Planet Earths 'Silk Weaver' episode. It's an hour engineering special on how primitive humans are compared to the brilliant elegance of insects.

Also, Brown Recluses infest much of SoCal, and a number of friends who lived in rickety ass houses complained about not being able to use certain parts of the house (fireplace, garage corners) because of the infestations that KILLS MOTHERFUCKERS! KILLS!
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Waldo » Thu Dec 18, 2008 5:37 pm UTC

Izawwlgood wrote:I've always been really impressed with spiders. Really.
To have your mind exploded, watch Planet Earths 'Silk Weaver' episode. It's an hour engineering special on how primitive humans are compared to the brilliant elegance of insects.

Also, Brown Recluses infest much of SoCal, and a number of friends who lived in rickety ass houses complained about not being able to use certain parts of the house (fireplace, garage corners) because of the infestations that KILLS MOTHERFUCKERS! KILLS!


I'm pretty sure we don't have Brown Recluses here in SoCal, or at least that's what I've always heard.

What we do have are black widows. And Woodlouse spiders, which are completely harmless and scary as hell. I love spiders, and I still HATE those...

Spoiler:
Woodlouse spider

Image
[Signature pending...]

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby SoapyHobo » Thu Dec 18, 2008 6:56 pm UTC

Jebobek wrote:Personally I like the Garfield strips of him whacking spiders:
Spoiler:
Oh wait thats the bird-eating-spider image :D
Remind me never to trust you again.

That one doesn't really bother me too much though, I think my brain just sort of shuts down and tells me there's no way it could possibly be real. I mean it's eating a fucking-bird, and not a small one either. I am glad I live in Britain where I am highly unlikely to be measuring spider size in feet, more than about three inches is far more than necessary.
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Chfan » Thu Dec 18, 2008 8:00 pm UTC

I kind of like spiders, actually. I can't stand the huge, fuzzy ones, but I think if I saw the OP spider without its brood it'd be less scary. The OP is scary because you know those spawnlings will become the size of their mommy...

/shudder
Just FYI, the guy isn't avatar isn't me. But he seems pretty cool.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Roland Lockheart » Thu Dec 18, 2008 8:09 pm UTC

As much as I dislike these giant spiders, I have to say that centipedes still creep me out more

Image

I mean, look at this thing...over a foot long and eats bats.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid ... 9430213933

Honestly, I'd rather not deal with either, but if I had to choose I would rather have a spider problem than a centipede problem.
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Jebobek » Thu Dec 18, 2008 8:10 pm UTC

I wonder what the adulthood survival rate is for those little dudes? How many of those will reach adulthood without being flamethrower'd?
Image

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Socal Swimmer » Thu Dec 18, 2008 8:39 pm UTC

Jebobek wrote:I wonder what the adulthood survival rate is for those little dudes? How many of those will reach adulthood without being flamethrower'd?


that depends on how many airstrikes get called in.

after seeing the picture, I imagine that not many will make it.
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby wst » Thu Dec 18, 2008 8:58 pm UTC

Anything I said pre-2014 that you want to quote me on, just run it past me to check I still agree with myself.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Clumpy » Thu Dec 18, 2008 9:52 pm UTC

The bat-eating centipede might be creepy, but at least it has the (genetic) decency to have venom that kills immediately. Being paralyzed by an enormous arthropod and slowly eating over a long period after being injected by venom that merely paralyzes (!) is much worse. It's the animal kingdom equivalent of "Hostel."

I seem to have hit a nerve with this thread. The squick in this thread is overwhelming.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Clumpy » Thu Dec 18, 2008 9:54 pm UTC

And now for something underwater that's also weird (but mostly cool): link.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby crowey » Thu Dec 18, 2008 9:57 pm UTC

That OP is creepy, mainly because can't figure out the scale so in my mind it's, like, 3ft accross. yick.
I quite like spiders, I saw this one in Kenya.
Spoiler:
Image
Not dangerous, but damn cool looking

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby elminster » Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:07 pm UTC

Surprised this one hasn't been posted:
Spoiler:
ImageImageImage
...Wouldn't really want to wake up to see that on your ceiling in the morning...

edit: Spelling/grammar. I suck at this.
Last edited by elminster on Fri Dec 19, 2008 6:51 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.
Image

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby danpilon54 » Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:13 pm UTC

elminster wrote:Surprised this one hasn't been posted:
Spoiler:
ImageImageImage
...Wouldn't really want to wake up to and see that on you're ceiling in the morning...


sometimes I wonder how spiders themselves can stand being around eachother...
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby roc314 » Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:18 pm UTC

elminster wrote:Surprised this one hasn't been posted:
Spoiler:
images
...Wouldn't really want to wake up to and see that on you're ceiling in the morning...
That was fucking sweet. Where were those pictures taken?
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby shayyy<3 » Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:35 pm UTC

elminster wrote:Surprised this one hasn't been posted:
Spoiler:
ImageImageImage
...Wouldn't really want to wake up to and see that on you're ceiling in the morning...


...there's a small part of me that really wants to take a long stick and swish it through them, and then watch them all scatter about.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Jack Saladin » Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:39 pm UTC

They'd probably all just fall down onto you and get stuck in your hair and you'd be running and screaming but there'd be nothing you could do and oh my god kill me now.

I'm still trying to find that gif I mentioned earlier in the thread. I saw it on ED once, but I can't find it now, and now I've just looked through a bunch of scary and gross pictures for nothing.
Last edited by Jack Saladin on Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:44 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.

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Re: The Spide (Image) From Hell

Postby PictureSarah » Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:43 pm UTC

Meaux_Pas wrote:It is a VERY good thing that you can't. And by 'you can't' I mean, "you like your spleen where it is, right?"

My last (non-fora) roommates got a tarantula without asking me. That kind of shit is not okay.


We kept it in our room. Plus, it shot poop at Mike. I would think you would have appreciated that.
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Jack Saladin » Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:46 pm UTC

Oh, and how in the fuck has no one posted Clock Spider yet?

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby RetSpline » Thu Dec 18, 2008 10:49 pm UTC

elminster wrote:Surprised this one hasn't been posted:
Spoiler:
ImageImageImage
...Wouldn't really want to wake up to and see that on you're ceiling in the morning...


That's just Daddy Longlegs, right? I've seen some large (though not that large) groupings before. Not sure why, but they don't really creep me out that much.

Clumpy wrote:And now for something underwater that's also weird (but mostly cool): link.


I really like deep-sea animals, squids especially. That thing is just freaky looking though, with the elbows. Really long tentacles, too.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Ann_on_a_mouse » Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:01 pm UTC

This thread needs more camel spider.
Spoiler:
Image

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Virtual_Aardvark » Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:04 pm UTC

I think this is becoming the thread for many legged animals. Lets get some octopi in here!

http://aqua.gjovaag.com/blogpics/BlueRingedOctopus.jpg

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby SoapyHobo » Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:14 pm UTC

Jack Saladin wrote:Oh, and how in the fuck has no one posted Clock Spider yet?
So who wants to change the batteries?
Image
Spoiler:
Image
Jack Saladin wrote:Goddamn that's an awesome ****, Soapy. Once they get around to making artificial **** and I replace my crappy original ones, I'm gonna make mine look like that.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby a386 » Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:19 pm UTC

i really i genuinely am ok with having a tarantula in my palm, and i'm cool with looking at any image of a spider i've ever come across, except the OP. oh my god something about how black it is and the glossyness implies this alive sleek hair texture that just turns the shit out of my stomach, i can't even take it. i kept envisioning a scenario in which i encounter that thing and try to squish it with a coffee mug but i miss and it winds up crawling on my arm and then who even knows what, that was the endgame even touching that thing, man a picture of a spider is not allowed to make my skin crawl like this. i didn't even care about that centipede video and that thing cold ate a bat!

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby tin » Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:21 pm UTC

Clock Spider has terrified me more than the OPs spider. :shock:
i dare you to take me on...

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby shayyy<3 » Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:22 pm UTC

Jack Saladin wrote:They'd probably all just fall down onto you and get stuck in your hair and you'd be running and screaming but there'd be nothing you could do and oh my god kill me now.


Which is why you get a really long broomstick, poke at an angle, and immediately sprint to a safe distance.
I'm sure there's some sort of mathematical law relating to the physics of this.

mspider/s"(t), where s(t) is the position function, relating to the distance between you and your point of safety...

XD

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby SoapyHobo » Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:24 pm UTC

tin wrote:Clock Spider has terrified me more than the OPs spider. :shock:
I held a book in front of the monitor while uploading the images, I caught glimpses of terrible things on the periphery of my vision. Imageshack's thumbnail preview was not appreciated.
Jack Saladin wrote:Goddamn that's an awesome ****, Soapy. Once they get around to making artificial **** and I replace my crappy original ones, I'm gonna make mine look like that.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby shayyy<3 » Thu Dec 18, 2008 11:26 pm UTC

SoapyHobo wrote:
Spoiler:
Image



...... :shock:

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Pirate.Bondage » Fri Dec 19, 2008 12:10 am UTC

elminster wrote:Surprised this one hasn't been posted:
Spoiler:
ImageImageImage
...Wouldn't really want to wake up to and see that on you're ceiling in the morning...


Holy shit that's a lot of spiders. I would love to see that in real life [not too closely though].
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Spuddly » Fri Dec 19, 2008 1:47 am UTC

Roland Lockheart wrote:As much as I dislike these giant spiders, I have to say that centipedes still creep me out more

Image

I mean, look at this thing...over a foot long and eats bats.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid ... 9430213933

Honestly, I'd rather not deal with either, but if I had to choose I would rather have a spider problem than a centipede problem.


I was with my dad when he got bit on the back of the neck at night by one of those things, twice. It left 4 bleeding puncture wounds. He said it felt like a sticky fruit had fallen onto his neck, because of all the legs holding on when he went to pull it off. Then it sunk its mandibles into him.

He had a scar there for about a year after it happened.

The funny thing is, the only light I had at the time was on a camcorder, and for some reason, I didn't take any footage of the holes in the back of his neck.
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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Midnight » Fri Dec 19, 2008 1:50 am UTC

first of all: spoiler everything you whores. spider on the third page, picture of a centipede. etc.

secondly, i have sweat and chills reaching from fingertips to toes to back of my goddamn neck to my goddamn testes.

i don't even hate spiders that mcuh. little ones, whatever. over about 2-3 inches and diameter and then i start worrying. over six inches, freak out.

over TWELVE INCHES like OP SPIDER and CLOCK SPIDER (which i have not looked at so i don't go fetal) and i will start doing the extreme freak out. if i saw that in real life i'd probably need psychiatric help. just cause... i wouldn't feel clean. ever. i'd probably burn down a whole city to get rid of that spider and it's young.
uhhhh fuck.

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Zak » Fri Dec 19, 2008 2:04 am UTC

I almost stepped on a tarantula in Cancun.

Little guy was pretty cute. Spiders aren't that bad when you see them in real life for me.
*waggles eyebrows*

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Outchanter » Fri Dec 19, 2008 2:32 am UTC

Spider Crab, Spider Crab! Does whatever a Spider Crab does (like having a 4m leg span).
Spoiler:
Image

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Re: The Spider (Image) From Hell

Postby Ann_on_a_mouse » Fri Dec 19, 2008 2:54 am UTC

Outchanter wrote:Spider Crab, Spider Crab! Does whatever a Spider Crab does (like having a 4m leg span).
Spoiler:
Image
Wow, it took a while for me to find an image with some scale for its size, but that thing is huge. Catch a couple of those and you could put Red Lobster out of business.


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