RAPTORS!

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unfuknblvble
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RAPTORS!

Postby unfuknblvble » Tue Oct 10, 2006 7:20 pm UTC

What are we going to DO?!?!?

http://www.velociraptors.info/

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no-genius
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Postby no-genius » Tue Oct 10, 2006 10:34 pm UTC

No point. If you spot one and try to take action, it'll already be too late. All you can do is pray for a quick death... which you're not going to get.

Arghh!!! RAPTOR ATTACK!!!!!!
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Postby no-genius » Wed Oct 25, 2006 2:18 am UTC

bump
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The Mighty Thesaurus wrote:Why? It does nothing to address dance music's core problem: the fact that it sucks.

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Postby VannA » Wed Oct 25, 2006 2:29 am UTC

You were attacked by raptors.

Therefore you are dead.

How can you bump a page when your dead?

I think your a bot, programmed by the late no-genius, specifically intended to bump a thread from beyond the grave.

Oh.

Oh NO.

Maybe the raptors tortured your account information out of you.

Maybe YOU are a raptor.
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no-genius
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Postby no-genius » Wed Oct 25, 2006 7:26 pm UTC

Well i was quoting Resevoir Dogs. The raptors didnt get the reference so they let me go.
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The Mighty Thesaurus wrote:Why? It does nothing to address dance music's core problem: the fact that it sucks.

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Postby Jesse » Wed Oct 25, 2006 7:32 pm UTC

Must be a lie. All raptors watch Reservoir Dogs twice a day.

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Postby Jack Saladin » Wed Oct 25, 2006 8:09 pm UTC

More like all Reservoir Dogs watch raptors twice a day. It's where they got the ear thing from.

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no-genius
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Postby no-genius » Thu Oct 26, 2006 11:25 pm UTC

VannA wrote:You were attacked by raptors.

Therefore you are dead.

How can you bump a page when your dead?


But that woman in TLW survived. your argument is not valid
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The Mighty Thesaurus wrote:Why? It does nothing to address dance music's core problem: the fact that it sucks.

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Postby Jack Saladin » Fri Oct 27, 2006 4:00 am UTC

Let us not talk of that incident.

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Postby kira » Fri Oct 27, 2006 10:37 am UTC

no-genius wrote:But that woman in TLW survived.


That was obviously a tactic by the raptors to lull us into a false sense of security.

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Postby Verysillyman » Fri Oct 27, 2006 11:19 am UTC

Tonight on the news, there was an entertainment run-down sort of section. The guy voicing over told us that they had made "Saw III", while it showed a clip from it. The guy then said that it looked a bit nasty, so he'd show a clip from the first in his favourite trilogy, Jurassic Park. And he did.

Instead of a relevant clip of Saw III, we had the T-rex eating a dinosaur. I was mighty impressed, since Jurassic Park actually had nothing to do with the item, bar that the presenter liked it better.

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no-genius
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Postby no-genius » Fri Oct 27, 2006 11:06 pm UTC

kira wrote:
no-genius wrote:But that woman in TLW survived.


That was obviously a tactic by the raptors to lull us into a false sense of security.


Gymnastics training! that is all that can save us now.

DO YOU THINK THINK THIS IS FUNNY?
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The Mighty Thesaurus wrote:Why? It does nothing to address dance music's core problem: the fact that it sucks.

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Postby Hastur » Tue Oct 31, 2006 2:33 am UTC

kira wrote:
no-genius wrote:But that woman in TLW survived.


That was obviously a tactic by the raptors to lull us into a false sense of security.


That entire movie was a tactic created by raptors... didn't you know that they directed that movie? The whole thing was to create propaganda that it is actually possible to survive raptors!

And in other news, stay out of the pools! Raptors have evolved to live underwater!
Image

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Postby Peshmerga » Tue Oct 31, 2006 2:35 am UTC

Well that's an odd place for a raptor. Echo Isles? Isn't that off of Theramore?
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Postby no-genius » Tue Oct 31, 2006 3:30 am UTC

Hastur wrote:That entire movie was a tactic created by raptors... didn't you know that they directed that movie? The whole thing was to create propaganda that it is actually possible to survive raptors!


if he comes near me i'll rip his nipples off
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The Mighty Thesaurus wrote:Why? It does nothing to address dance music's core problem: the fact that it sucks.

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Postby rachel » Tue Oct 31, 2006 4:56 am UTC

Image

Guys, seriously. What kind of dinosaur is that? It is pretty yellow. Is it a raptor? It was scary.

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Postby Belial » Tue Oct 31, 2006 5:10 am UTC

Its arms are too puny and weak to be a velociraptor...I want to say something related to Tyrannosaurus...an Allosaurid of some kind, maybe.

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Postby Gelsamel » Tue Oct 31, 2006 5:17 am UTC

And it doesn't have any feathers .

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Postby rachel » Tue Oct 31, 2006 5:30 am UTC

Okay well it is kind of just hanging out in my town. Should I be frightened even though it is not a raptor? Does this mean raptors are coming?

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Belial
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Postby Belial » Tue Oct 31, 2006 6:52 am UTC

You're never safe...erm...I mean...Of course you shouldn't be worried. Raptors are a relatively negligible threat, really.

In fact, they're mostly harmless. If you see one rushing at you, arms outstretched, it probably just wants to hug you.

Yes....hug....definitely.

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Postby Peshmerga » Tue Oct 31, 2006 7:11 am UTC

They're just playing tag... with their teef.
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Postby Jack Saladin » Tue Oct 31, 2006 7:23 am UTC

The more people we trick like this, the safer we'll be. The longer it takes for them to mow through the crowds of the uninformed, the longer we have to get to the XKCD-anti-raptor-bunkers distributed around the globe.

We have anti-raptor-bunkers, right? Right?

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Postby Kas » Tue Oct 31, 2006 7:47 am UTC

Even if we did, it would only be a matter of time before the raptors came up with anti-anti-Raptor bunker tactics. They can open doors you know.
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Postby Jack Saladin » Tue Oct 31, 2006 9:33 am UTC

Damn. The one thing all our bunkers have.

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Postby Verysillyman » Tue Oct 31, 2006 11:22 am UTC

Mine doesn't, as a clever design feature one has to climb in through the window.

I think my nearest raptor shelter would be the cracroft caverns. they were built in one of the wars to protect us from a very similar threat; japs. They are currently used as a gimmick, and to hold a giant laser.

I love the thought of huge underground military bases that contain giant lasers being nearby.

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Postby rachel » Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:15 am UTC

Look, VSM, can I come live with you? Because I'm not that scared of raptors, but I mean ... I'm pretty scared of zombies. And this raptor shelter sounds like it'd double as an awesome zombie shelter. And zombies, man ... they're frightening.

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Postby no-genius » Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:19 am UTC

rachel wrote:Image

Guys, seriously. What kind of dinosaur is that? It is pretty yellow. Is it a raptor? It was scary.


Is that the one that got Nedry? Dumb animal
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Postby Verysillyman » Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:54 am UTC

I think I have room for a few more people. I'm not sure how my parents would respond to strangers moving in though. It could also be a little awkward explaining to them that it's because of the zombies :P

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Postby rachel » Wed Nov 01, 2006 1:58 am UTC

Um ... it's alright. We'll pretend I am a foreign exchange student. Or we are married. Or I am just visiting until there are no more zombies ever. Or I guess it could just be that I'm just visiting, without the zombie part. Any of the above will work.

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Postby Verysillyman » Wed Nov 01, 2006 2:00 am UTC

You could come over for tea and biscuits, then just forget to leave?

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Postby rachel » Wed Nov 01, 2006 2:08 am UTC

That is officially my plan. Eventually. When I have the time. Hopefully I have the time before we are all attacked by zombies or raptors.

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Postby siliconslave » Wed Nov 01, 2006 9:04 am UTC

crap, theres a raptor (well t-rex) comeing out me roof:

Image
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Re: RAPTORS!

Postby SilentKiller » Tue Jun 24, 2008 5:14 pm UTC

let's see b4 they chomp us to death we can look at my answer and think of riddles that might make them mad and make us suffer even more like ''My raptors a laptor'' and ''raptor raptor take a little bite they look away and wake up in a kettel with rabid dogs'' and '' raptors are like a little part of life you just gotta make other reservations on your schedule and when they come to kill you on your schedule they'll have to wait till u done maybe you can trick it to giing in a car with you and when u escort it in u close the doors and loick them and Michael Myer accidentally stabs the raptor instead of you''.
*They* say that the best weapon is the one you never have to fire. I respectfully disagree. I prefer the weapon you only have to fire once. That's how Dad did it, that's how America does it... and it's worked out pretty well so far.

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Re: RAPTORS!

Postby michaelandjimi » Thu Jun 26, 2008 8:29 am UTC

Wow. That was an impressive thread necro. It's like 2 years old, and we've probably got a gajillion raptor threads around these parts (and a couple of thread raptors).

And that post was even more incoherent than my average post.
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Re: RAPTORS!

Postby bigglesworth » Thu Jun 26, 2008 10:18 am UTC

you know, raptors are so clever that they beat my friend in a card game

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Re: RAPTORS!

Postby screech » Thu Jun 26, 2008 11:38 am UTC

Indeed, that was quite a bizarre necro.

In other news, I thought I was a raptor once. I am unsure if that was some sort of brainwashing or what.
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Re: RAPTORS!

Postby michaelandjimi » Thu Jun 26, 2008 11:42 am UTC

screech wrote:In other news, I thought I was a raptor once. I am unsure if that was some sort of brainwashing or what.
I am skeptical. But also deeply sympathetic. Do you often have to restrain yourself in public places? Is the sound of a beating heart enough to stir you into a frenzied bloodlust, only quenched by the soft, juicy taste of flesh between your jaws? Are you curious about the lack of pigeons in your area, and occasionally wake up with feathers stuck between your teeth?

These are things we need to know...
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Re: RAPTORS!

Postby LE4dGOLEM » Thu Jun 26, 2008 5:39 pm UTC

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Re: RAPTORS!

Postby Unicyclist » Thu Jun 26, 2008 6:54 pm UTC

Aren't Utahraptors the ones we need to watch out for? The velociraptors aren't as threatening, considering their size. Unless Velociraptors could actually fly, even for short distances...
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Re: RAPTORS!

Postby Okita » Thu Jun 26, 2008 7:02 pm UTC

Well I've seen some pretty interesting research on the subject of jetpacks.

Not that I would have to use one...

Er, not that I would have any need to use one either...
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