[SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Tomlidich the second » Fri Mar 14, 2014 5:56 pm UTC

Mighty Jalapeno wrote:My youngest has a cat toy, that's a girl cat, that ONLY kisses other girl-cat toys. Because she's just that kind of cat.


I am not sure if i read this correctly, is this a childrens toy that is a representation of a cat, or an actual toy intended for cats to play with?
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Mighty Jalapeno » Fri Mar 14, 2014 5:59 pm UTC

It's a cat stuffy, like a plush toy, shaped like a cat. My girls have probably between 80 and 100 stuffies, just built up over the years from thrift shops. One of them, a rainbow cat toy named Rainbow, is a girl cat that only kisses other girl cats.

I suppose I have nothing real to contribute to the conversation. I just thought it was a cute story.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Tomlidich the second » Fri Mar 14, 2014 6:01 pm UTC

aha, just as i thought. kudos :D
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Fri Mar 14, 2014 8:38 pm UTC

Bleh. So I'm just waiting around for those gender team people to get back to me, and have been looking around on the internet for more information, and... it's depressing as fuck. I've not even started transitioning, but from what I gathered I can look forward to not being accepted by 90% of the population as a real woman, not really passing because of the damage puberty has done, and stuff like that.

Sorry, just needed to rant.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby poxic » Fri Mar 14, 2014 10:20 pm UTC

*hugs*
In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Fri Mar 14, 2014 11:56 pm UTC

Thanks. Talked to a few people, and think I'll be fine until I can call my therapist on Monday. Until then, there's 19 hours of MLP I can watch to get through the weekend. *hugs back*

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Shivahn » Sat Mar 15, 2014 12:22 am UTC

Wonderbolt wrote:Bleh. So I'm just waiting around for those gender team people to get back to me, and have been looking around on the internet for more information, and... it's depressing as fuck. I've not even started transitioning, but from what I gathered I can look forward to not being accepted by 90% of the population as a real woman, not really passing because of the damage puberty has done, and stuff like that.

Sorry, just needed to rant.

While everyone has a different result, I can say that things have worked out better than expected for me. It's all scary, but I've found that handling things as they come instead of worrying about every little thing that might go wrong has been helpful.

(Also your avatar is pretty excellent.)

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Sat Mar 15, 2014 12:26 am UTC

Shivahn wrote:While everyone has a different result, I can say that things have worked out better than expected for me. It's all scary, but I've found that handling things as they come instead of worrying about every little thing that might go wrong has been helpful.

Here's to hoping for the best, then! Thanks. *hugs* :D

Shivahn wrote:(Also your avatar is pretty excellent.)

Why, your avatar is looking pretty awesome, too! (Maybe even about 20% cooler.)

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Dissident Love » Sat Mar 15, 2014 1:10 am UTC

Just saying hello, I have a lot of back reading to do!

Also, wow, I tried to sign up for the fora, and found out I already had. Four years ago. :shock:
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby patzer » Sat Mar 15, 2014 1:11 am UTC

Wonderbolt:

If you haven't seen it yet, [url=http://www.fimfiction.net/story/1876/1/Dash%27s-Secret/Dash%com-Secret]this story[/url] is sure to cheer you up :3
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wednesday » Sat Mar 15, 2014 1:12 am UTC

Wonderbolt wrote:
Shivahn wrote:While everyone has a different result, I can say that things have worked out better than expected for me. It's all scary, but I've found that handling things as they come instead of worrying about every little thing that might go wrong has been helpful.

Here's to hoping for the best, then! Thanks. *hugs* :D

Shivahn wrote:(Also your avatar is pretty excellent.)

Why, your avatar is looking pretty awesome, too! (Maybe even about 20% cooler.)

I totally just thought you two were the same person, because I register avatar colors more than names or whatever. And now I know that you aren't.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby The Mighty Thesaurus » Sat Mar 15, 2014 3:14 am UTC

Everyone is Cheese.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Dissident Love » Sat Mar 15, 2014 3:48 am UTC

Edam straight.
addams wrote:The whole of the US Population is a Special Needs Group.
Yeah, but we're just ordinary Earthlings, not wierdos from another planet like he is.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby SecondTalon » Sat Mar 15, 2014 3:58 am UTC

Wrong Cheese.

It's a long joke. Well, not long, but old. And true. We're all Cheese's sockpuppets here.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Sat Mar 15, 2014 10:20 am UTC

patzer wrote:If you haven't seen it yet, this story [fixed link] is sure to cheer you up :3

Need to take a shower first (yay internet before getting dressed!) but I like what I'm reading so far. Thanks! :D

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby PM 2Ring » Sat Mar 15, 2014 11:08 am UTC

Also check out Professor Lynn Conway's homepage.

From Wikipedia
Lynn Conway (born 1938) is an American computer scientist, electrical engineer, inventor, trans woman, and activist for the transgender community.

Conway is notable for a number of pioneering achievements, including the Mead & Conway revolution in VLSI design, which incubated an emerging electronic design automation industry. She worked at IBM in the 1960s and is credited with the invention of generalised dynamic instruction handling, a key advance used in out-of-order execution, used by most modern computer processors to improve performance.


Lynn is the co-author (with Carver Mead) of Introduction to VLSI Systems, the "bible" of computer chip design. Although it was originally published over 30 years ago, many of its concepts are still relevant today.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby socktopus » Sun Mar 16, 2014 1:37 pm UTC

I just reread Chaos Life's agender agenda comic and realising how much of what they said applied to me again reminded me why I bookmarked it in the first place. Whole lot of confusion again.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Tue Mar 18, 2014 10:17 am UTC

Is it always this complicated to actually get help?

My therapist referred me to another department within the psychiatric thingy, so now I'll be getting a letter from them at Some DateTM to come back for another intake at Another DateTM with someone who can then maybe help me except I really don't know because they don't tell me anything.

Meanwhile, I've made an appointment with my GP this Thursday to refer me to the gender team at the hospital (going at it from all angles, I suppose), but I just heard that the waiting list for this team is approximately 10 months long. So no idea whether that's going to be of any use either.

What. Really people, how hard can it be to just help me out a bit here instead of sending me from X to Y and Z and making me wait the whole time. -_- This is just all immensely frustrating.

In slightly better news: I came out to a few friends this weekend, and they were totally cool with it. Yay!

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Brace » Tue Mar 18, 2014 2:11 pm UTC

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Monika » Wed Mar 19, 2014 7:47 pm UTC

Wonderbolt wrote:Is it always this complicated to actually get help?

My therapist referred me to another department within the psychiatric thingy, so now I'll be getting a letter from them at Some DateTM to come back for another intake at Another DateTM with someone who can then maybe help me except I really don't know because they don't tell me anything.

Meanwhile, I've made an appointment with my GP this Thursday to refer me to the gender team at the hospital (going at it from all angles, I suppose), but I just heard that the waiting list for this team is approximately 10 months long. So no idea whether that's going to be of any use either.

What. Really people, how hard can it be to just help me out a bit here instead of sending me from X to Y and Z and making me wait the whole time. -_- This is just all immensely frustrating.

That sucks. Which country are you in? Do you have money to pursue private care while on the waiting lists for the public care?

In slightly better news: I came out to a few friends this weekend, and they were totally cool with it. Yay!

Yay! \o/
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Wed Mar 19, 2014 11:09 pm UTC

Monika wrote:That sucks. Which country are you in? Do you have money to pursue private care while on the waiting lists for the public care?

The Netherlands. And not really, as I already have significant student loans this would just be unaffordable without insurance (not to mention I'm not sure things such as HRT DIY are even legal here). Had a bit of a panic attack (bit of an understatement) over it and spoke to my GP, who I can now call first thing in the morning when she'll let me know how long I'll have to wait. Fingers crossed.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby NovaNatalia » Wed Mar 19, 2014 11:42 pm UTC

My T-levels are still over 5 nmol/dL and won't come down :( Now the endo has me on 6mg/day oestradiol
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Thu Mar 20, 2014 10:50 am UTC

Spoilered for trigger warnings (suicide).

Spoiler:
People are useless. My GP was being all sympathic about it when I actually was there, but when I called this morning I heard from her assistant that I'd need to wait 8 weeks before getting a talk with a psychiatrist there, and 1 year(!) before getting to the actual gender team. Also, I'm apparently supposed to be happy about that. Never mind that these people know that in the last week I've had to call a crisis hotline multiple times and had to speak to multiple therapists just because of how suicidal I was feeling.

In other words, that's not an option. I'm going to push as hard as I can to get things to happen sooner, but while crying in the shower this morning I also decided that if I'm not getting help and on HRT before my next birthday (that's a little less than 4 months from now), I'm going to kill myself. I can only deal with an impossible situation for so long.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Brace » Thu Mar 20, 2014 1:32 pm UTC

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Thu Mar 20, 2014 1:40 pm UTC

That's actually one of the options I'm considering before letting it go that far. I'm not just going to sit and wait.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Brace » Thu Mar 20, 2014 1:59 pm UTC

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Monika » Thu Mar 20, 2014 4:03 pm UTC

Wonderbolt wrote:Spoilered for TWs.

Spoiler:
People are useless. My GP was being all sympathic about it when I actually was there, but when I called this morning I heard from her assistant that I'd need to wait 8 weeks before getting a talk with a psychiatrist there, and 1 year(!) before getting to the actual gender team. Also, I'm apparently supposed to be happy about that. Never mind that these people know that in the last week I've had to call a crisis hotline multiple times and had to speak to multiple therapists just because of how suicidal I was feeling.

In other words, that's not an option. I'm going to push as hard as I can to get things to happen sooner, but while crying in the shower this morning I also decided that if I'm not getting help and on HRT before my next birthday (that's a little less than 4 months from now), I'm going to kill myself. I can only deal with an impossible situation for so long.

[TW for mentioning of death, suicide in the below text.]

*hugs* Hang in there. Yes, having to wait weeks and months is horrible. But you can do it! Or order hormones and blockers online. Or buy them in a country with low control when you are there on vacation, uni exchange or the like (I heard even Southern and Eastern Europe may work). Or borrow more money and seek private care in the Netherlands or a nearby country. A couple of hundred more Euros for psych appointments, blood tests and hormones are sure a good investment to keep you alive.
Is this clinic and gender team the only one in the Netherlands? It might be, NL is pretty small, but check out if there is another place that you can go to ... having to take the train for 2 hours to and from an appointment sucks, but it doesn't suck as badly as being dead. Try to get on several waiting lists. Keep in mind waiting lists tend to suddenly shorten, exactly because people are on multiple waiting lists, e.g. I waited for a psych appointment, they said 8 months, I got one with the same therapist in 3 months - many people on the waiting list before me had already gotten appointment with other therapists and didn't need this one anymore, but they didn't call all the therapists to let them know they can take them off their waiting list.
Also do other things that alleviates your dysphoria somewhat while you are waiting for hormones. You seem to already have found some stuff, like shaving off all your body hair. Try some things and figure out what else helps you feel a bit better, like painting toe or finger nails, nice clothes or some jewelry, or maybe a wig or a padded bra is something that works for you. You have to decide yourself if you only want to wear them at home or if you feel comfortable and safe going other places, some time or all the time.
And keep posting here and/or in other places and/or come to the chat - #xkcd-q has a lot of other trans women, who can give you encouragement.
It seems to be that for many dysphoria comes in waves, going up and down, so even if you feel really bad today and like you cannot stand this for more than 4 more months, in those months there will probably also be days in which you don't feel the dysphoria so much. So hang on and keep going, you will get there!
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Thu Mar 20, 2014 8:04 pm UTC

Brace wrote:Interesting how not being allowed to move forward seemed to be diagnostically useful as whatever doubts you have are no longer enough to keep you from moving forward :P

Heh, I hadn't actually thought about that, but I suppose you have a point. Someone on Reddit told me to ask myself the hypothetical question "If someone told you you could never be a woman, how would that make you feel?", and maybe this is the same question in a more realistic form.

Monika, thanks for the kind words. Borrowing more money to get things done is indeed an option - I'd rather have to live a little more frugally from 25-40 than be completely miserable with myself. This is just one of those cases where I know it's covered by insurance if you go through official channels, so many of the more expensive things (FFS, SRS) probably have to wait a bit. It would probably be rather irresponsible to borrow thousands of euros just because I couldn't wait for some of these things.

Hormones... That's a different matter. I've looked around, but couldn't find much on the legality of estradiol and spironolactone. Which means it might well be legal to have around. I always assumed that since testosterone is illegal to possess here, E and spiro would be, too. (Then again, T is a widely abused performance enhancer, so I suppose it makes sense.) So that turns out to be a very real option, although I'm still holding off on making a decision there for a few days because I first want to do some research. Together with hair removal (which, unfortunately, is expensive), these might well go a long way before I actually get an appointment with the gender team.

With the whole "prove that you're trans first before we help you" around here I'm a bit worried about what the doctors will say if I've gone DIY before getting their help. It might show I mean business, but from what I've heard it's really frowned upon, at least by the GPs I've spoken to. Might be a good idea to keep track of everything so they'll know I'm not just messing around.

Yeah, feeling much better already. I apologize for the extreme mood swings I've been showing the last week, everyone. They'll probably continue for a while, but hopefully it gets better over time. I also really appreciate the help and kindness everyone's shown here. :)

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Monika » Thu Mar 20, 2014 8:54 pm UTC

Wonderbolt wrote:Yeah, feeling much better already. I apologize for the extreme mood swings I've been showing the last week, everyone.

Don't worry about it. Coming to terms with your gender identity and having to face all the gatekeeping is both stressful. *huggles*
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby The Mighty Thesaurus » Fri Mar 21, 2014 5:25 am UTC

If I were the sort of person who used trigger warnings, I'd use the full term. When employed as a trigger warning, the abbreviation "TW" runs counter to its nominal purpose.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Monika » Fri Mar 21, 2014 2:45 pm UTC

I don't see why. Most people know that TW stands for trigger warning. Even those who don't will see something mentioned afterwards and can figure out that the following text will contain these topics and skip reading it if it's something that would trigger a post-traumatic stress response in them or that they are just not comfortable with reading.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Fri Mar 21, 2014 2:48 pm UTC

*nod* Edited to add keyword, though, just in case.

Also, just ordered the stuff. Not yet sure where to start and all that, but knowing that at least I'll have the option for low-dose HRT until I get to a doctor has calmed me considerably.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Monika » Fri Mar 21, 2014 2:51 pm UTC

Ah yeah, mentioning the type of trigger is better.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby SecondTalon » Fri Mar 21, 2014 4:15 pm UTC

When it comes to trigger warnings in a safe space, I'd rather us be in a place where we take the extra moment to type it out completely rather than abbreviating it. I'm also a fan of a quick description of why it's potentially triggering.

Discussions on that are probably best left in another thread.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Enuja » Mon Mar 24, 2014 4:14 pm UTC

I saw two great trans related links on Facebook this morning, so I'm sharing them with you all.

A stream-of-consciousness style celebration of trans diversity

And three transition montages

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby ShortChelsea » Tue Mar 25, 2014 4:50 am UTC

The transition videos were inspiring, thanks for sharing.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Wonderbolt » Wed Mar 26, 2014 1:20 pm UTC

Some very nice links, Enuja, awesome! :D

Unrelated: is it weird to just utterly dislike a therapist for no real good reason? I saw one today and I can't quite describe what it is, but I just felt an extreme dislike for the guy and the way he asked me about everything. It probably also had to do with how he responded to me being stressed out with such pearls as "Are you always this hostile?" I think I can be pretty bitchy, but... when I'm totally stressed out those are maybe not the right questions to ask. (And this is an exception, I was much more open with that psychiatrist I went to earlier.)

It's no big deal to not go there anymore, as I'm already on the waiting list for the gender team and my hormones should arrive in a week or so, but I'm curious whether this happens to more people who've had therapy.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby Brace » Wed Mar 26, 2014 2:56 pm UTC

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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby eSOANEM » Wed Mar 26, 2014 6:21 pm UTC

Hypnosis is definitely a real thing and has been proven so in numerous clinical trials. Some researchers did a meta-anlysis in 2003 which concluded that, even under the most skeptical analysis of the data of 444 previous trials, hypnosis still came out as having some genuine positive effect. In particular it appears to be an effective treatment for acute & chronic pain, anxiety and stress, insomnia and various psychosomatic conditions. To dismiss it in the same sentence as other beliefs which have no such scientific evidence is disingenuous at best.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] LGBTIQQA Thread - Queer Support!

Postby poxic » Wed Mar 26, 2014 7:04 pm UTC

There are therapists that are easier to get along with. Once you find one, therapy actually becomes useful.
In everyone's life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit.
- Albert Schweitzer, philosopher, physician, musician, Nobel laureate (14 Jan 1875-1965)


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