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Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Sun Feb 13, 2011 2:05 am UTC
by Mauthe Dhoo
(For a campus job) I read and revise essays for classes I've never taken.

I also run around a 4th grade classroom trying to convince school children to pretend to be wizards and superheroes, then I go home and try to come up with a way that makes them smarter.

Later in the spring, people will pay me to walk their dogs, which means I'll more or less be paid to be happy.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Sun Feb 13, 2011 6:43 am UTC
by iChef
I pay people to pillage the oceans of species that needs to be protected way more than anyone will ever tell you about. Wastefully prepare them and sling 'em on plates to yuppies who don't appreciate what they're eating because it's too coated in mayonnaise, breading and corn syrup. (for the love of God if you find yourself walking into the doors of a corporate owned food establishment turn and run like hell, I don't care how high end or trendy they seem or how much they charge run and never come back). I also consult for a locally owned Italian place that does it right and I am much happier working for, but that doesn't pay the bills, or give me health coverage.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Sun Feb 13, 2011 4:47 pm UTC
by Kewangji
None of this earns me money, but:

I process information in order to achieve checkpoints which in turn will lead to more information and more checkpoints to achieve.

I play pretend and then tell people to do things with it, and run between places carrying stuff and information.

I make bad jokes and talk about news, being interrupted by music every now and then.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Tue Feb 15, 2011 7:25 am UTC
by Dark567
I go to different cities and companies and tell them how to run their IT departments.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Tue Feb 15, 2011 10:26 am UTC
by Eseell
I usually tell people that I build the Internet, but that's a bit misleading because I do not lay long-haul fiber nor am I a content developer. I do network architecture and design for a nationwide US cableco, mostly at layers 2 and 3. Currently that means a lot of work with iBGP, MPLS, and IPv6.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Tue Feb 15, 2011 10:36 am UTC
by cjdrum
fizzgig wrote:I work for the Australian version of social security, which is called Centrelink. So when people ask me I just tell them I live off Centrelink money.

I find this as win, living in Australia myself.

What I do? I move from room to room in a few linked buildings, where people give me work based off of their strong points. I stay in each room for a little over half an hour, then move to the next. Repeat. Problem: I don't get paid.

Wait. That doesn't make it sound any more interesting.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Tue Feb 15, 2011 2:22 pm UTC
by RetSpline
This post had objectionable content.

(I stock overnight at Wal-Mart)

Triggering language. -lanicita

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Thu Feb 17, 2011 11:47 am UTC
by Carlington
I had a co-worker tell me that if anyone asked me what I did for a living, I had to say I was a professional burger-spitter.

So, i am a professional, part-time burger-spitter.


(I work at McDonald's. I don't actually spit in burgers. That would be gross.)

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Thu Feb 17, 2011 2:14 pm UTC
by Coffee
I'm kinda like a plumber who has to keep some people from taking showers.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 5:15 pm UTC
by emceng
I do complicated engineering stuff, and by that I mean I try and do as little work as possible and surf the internet.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Fri Feb 18, 2011 10:22 pm UTC
by Menacing Spike
I spend most of my life pressing buttons to make the pattern of lights change however I want.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 5:38 am UTC
by existential_squirrrel
my titles: Undergraduate Research Assistant and Chemistry/Biology/Mathematics Tutor.

In reality: slave to the heap of dirty glassware in the university stockroom, the breaker of beakers, test tubes, and funnels, cleaner of disgusting messes, and in general swearer at things that don't function properly.

explainer of chemical, mathematical, and biological processes to people who need assistance.

welcome to what I get paid to do.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 6:39 am UTC
by CHR1110
I take people's crap all day.

No, literally, I work as a donations attendant at Goodwill.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 6:47 am UTC
by Triangle_Man
Study, do Homework, read, use the internet too Goddamn much. The usual, I guess.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 8:40 am UTC
by Retne
Menacing Spike wrote:I spend most of my life pressing buttons to make the pattern of lights change however I want.


Do you run an actual board or are you an editor?(I'm guessing you work in TV/Movies)

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Sat Feb 19, 2011 8:54 am UTC
by Menacing Spike
Retne wrote:
Menacing Spike wrote:I spend most of my life pressing buttons to make the pattern of lights change however I want.


Do you run an actual board or are you an editor?(I'm guessing you work in TV/Movies)


No, programming.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 1:46 am UTC
by ConMan
I work out ways to help us not have to ask so many people so many questions.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 2:34 am UTC
by JamesP
I don't need to make it funny or extra cool.

Guy: What do you do?
Me:I'm a sound engineer and composer
Guy: So you get to play music all day?
Me: No
Guy: So what do you do?
Me: Listen to music, click record and play with sliders that don't do as much as the players think, but if they knew that they wouldn't give me £300 a day.
Guy: ......Huh, so what do you compose for?
Me: Video games.
Guy: Oh fuck off.

Re: Describe What You Do

Posted: Mon Feb 21, 2011 3:47 am UTC
by MrJ
I program graphical displays for experimental aircraft. I also break things and maintain computers. Sometimes I fix other people's problems.