[SAFESPACE] Woman Thread - All Things Women. Period.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby blue_eyedspacemonkey » Tue Jul 14, 2009 8:12 pm UTC

I am also voting for the blond streak. I think it will be awesome :)

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Virtual_Aardvark » Tue Jul 14, 2009 8:21 pm UTC

I vote for the blond streak. I absolutely love the effect of dark, goldish blonde in dark hair, particularly curly hair.

I'm blessed with the ability to look pretty good no matter what my hair is like. It's nice to not be afraid to make a really radical change to my image. If I wasn't trying to grow out my hair I would probably get a mohawk. Just for the hell of it.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Sungura » Tue Jul 14, 2009 8:40 pm UTC

Okay while we are on hair and getting amazing advice could I get some advice???

I am trying to grow mine out since January when I had it cut quite short. It is now (when straight) down to my shoulders, slightly above when it's wavy and dry. Anyway recent shot of me from the 4th of July lab party:
Spoiler:
Image

So that's my hair. It is slightly higher in the back as when they cut it they did a higher in the back/lower in the front deal.

I am still trying to grow it out (I want it looong as I have never had long hair - I don't remember it ever being much past shoulders even when I was little) but it is soooo thick (whenever I get it cut I am told I have enough for at least three more people) and it's starting to get hot. I don't want to loose length as I want to keep growing it out; the ends are fine and such I don't need it trimmed really although I realize to style it somehow might require a touch of trimming.

So...ideas? Basically I want something that is
1) doesn't take off a lot ie. keeps it as long as possible
2) maybe thins it somehow? so it's not so hot
3) not too hard to do, I am usually up and out the door in 15 minutes in the morning & I shower at night and let it air dry overnight
4) almost forgot - no bangs. I hate bangs on me.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby LL Cool J » Tue Jul 14, 2009 9:50 pm UTC

I have three hours to kill until my uni enrolment opens. Photoshopping a blonde streak into a face-thread picture of Tin is becoming less creepy and more of a good idea as time ticks by.

Sorry, Amy, I'm not sure what to do with your hair, straight thick hair is pretty much opposite to my experience.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Cassi » Tue Jul 14, 2009 9:57 pm UTC

As I don't know your exact cut, I don't know how much it applies, but last time I was growing my hair out it was from a bob, and once it had grown out to probably about where yours was, my hairdresser ended up cutting quite a bit off -- the aim being to get the front shorter than the back, which ended up making it look not much shorter but a lot nicer. (Even if I was a bit shocked to see how much hair was going, even after she'd explained what she was doing and why!)

I really need a cut myself, but I'm holding off in case I end up having to waitress this summer, as once I get it cut again it won't be able to go up at all. It's just about long enough to pull up now (if I don't expect it all to stay up for long), which is really my limit these days for how long I'll let it get without starting to hate it.

In terms of colour, I wish I had the guts to do something extreme, but I don't at all. I used to get highlights, but am quite glad I stopped. Once I got past the shock of how dark my hair seemed when I grew the highlights back, I've become quite fond of it. And bits go pretty much white blond in the sun anyway -- I have a few very blond streaks now from my week in Egypt!
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby TaintedDeity » Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:00 pm UTC

Dooo it!
Ⓞⓞ◯

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby kellsbells » Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:01 pm UTC

Tin, here's yet another vote in favor of the blonde streak. I think it sounds pretty much excellent. I've always wanted to sneak a streak or two into my hair.

Sungura wrote:Because last night you, jessica, jess, and I were shoe-shopping in my dream. Until the tornado came and ripped through the shoe store and we were in a shower of shoes instead of a rainshower. I got knocked out by a boot flying towards me and that's when I woke up.
Aww, sad I missed that! I would've liked to go shoe shopping with you guys. In a tornado, even! I would've been utterly blown away by the fun of that. :wink:

And Amy, while I'm in the same boat as __jess (straight hair, what?) I'm going to say that the solution to your hair's thickness is the same as it is for mine: layers. You could keep the length and lose a lot of the weight, and possibly get more shape to it. Layers are what keep my hair from being a sad triangle around my head, so I think that's worth looking into.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby tin » Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:07 pm UTC

__jess wrote:I have three hours to kill until my uni enrolment opens. Photoshopping a blonde streak into a face-thread picture of Tin is becoming less creepy and more of a good idea as time ticks by.


*spits tea over keyboard* FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND HOLY, DO IT.

Sungura wrote:Hair stuff


I wouldn't be able to suggest any actual hairstyles, Sungura, but i'd suggest maybe getting some long layers cut into your hair to thin it out?

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby LL Cool J » Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:10 pm UTC

TaintedDeity wrote:Dooo it!
Who, me?
kellsbells wrote:Tin, here's yet another vote in favor of the blonde streak. I think it sounds pretty much excellent. I've always wanted to sneak a streak or two into my hair.

Sungura wrote:Because last night you, jessica, jess, and I were shoe-shopping in my dream. Until the tornado came and ripped through the shoe store and we were in a shower of shoes instead of a rainshower. I got knocked out by a boot flying towards me and that's when I woke up.
Aww, sad I missed that! I would've liked to go shoe shopping with you guys. In a tornado, even! I would've been utterly blown away by the fun of that. :wink:
Oh Kells, Kells, that was just terrible. I know you were just lightning the mood, but really, weather or not your intentions were good or not is not the issue here. I'm sure you're under high pressure, but that's no excuse. Please don't storm off. Breeze-onable. Friends?

Ok I'm done.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby kellsbells » Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:19 pm UTC

__jess wrote:
Kellsbells wrote:
Sungura wrote:Because last night you, jessica, jess, and I were shoe-shopping in my dream. Until the tornado came and ripped through the shoe store and we were in a shower of shoes instead of a rainshower. I got knocked out by a boot flying towards me and that's when I woke up.
Aww, sad I missed that! I would've liked to go shoe shopping with you guys. In a tornado, even! I would've been utterly blown away by the fun of that. :wink:
Oh Kells, Kells, that was just terrible. I know you were just lightning the mood, but really, weather or not your intentions were good or not is not the issue here. I'm sure you're under high pressure, but that's no excuse. Please don't storm off. Breeze-onable. Friends?
Oh, Jess, you didn't have to retaliate by inundating me under a torrent of more puns. No need to steal my thunder! I was just trying to break the ice a little, you know. But don't worry, I won't give you the cold shoulder. Friends, rain or shine.

Now I'm done too.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Enuja » Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:33 pm UTC

FYI, I made a Head Hair Thread for questions and answers about hair!

That said, Sungura, is your hair long enough to go and stay up in a pony tail? If so, I'd suggest all kinds of buns. There are some that are very quick and easy to do, some that take time, some that are fascinating ... you won't be able to do all of them just yet, but if your hair can stay up it can be in at least a small bun. It's been a while since I've had hair long enough for me to want to put it into a bun, so I don't have specific "here's how to do a super easy relatively short hair bun" advice, but maybe someone will put some in the new hair thread!

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby PictureSarah » Tue Jul 14, 2009 10:50 pm UTC

I have long, very thick, very smooth hair, that doesn't like to curl, and doesn't like to be held in place by pins or hairspray. People compliment me on it all the time, mostly because it's pretty long (mid-back) and super shiny, I guess. For the last several years (excluding the year I had a bob that required maintenance), I've only got two haircuts a year (at Supercuts or similar), and I still don't really get split ends. I don't heat style, and I used whatever cruelty-free shampoo and conditioner are on sale. I dye my hair myself, at home, with whatever dye is on sale, and I only dye it because people kept asking me if I dyed my eyebrows (which are black, and my hair is naturally brown). :?

Some day I will get trims every 6-8 weeks, and professional colors, and maybe an actual style, and all those lovely things...but for now, I spend under $150/year on my hair, and to get professional cuts and colors with any kind of regularity, I'd be *starting* at $550/year. Can't afford it.

Edit: I meant to put that in the hair thread. Oh well.
Last edited by PictureSarah on Wed Jul 15, 2009 12:36 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Sungura » Wed Jul 15, 2009 12:23 am UTC

Layers. Got it.
Also, it is not straight, it is wavy. It is so thick and the length it is at now with just being heavy is weighing it all down but the ends (which you can see in this photo are bobbing under, but they prefer to be random I'm not sure how they did that trick). I can't make my hair do anything it doesn't want to do so I sorta let it wave whichever way.

Enjua - it could do a low or mid ponytail, true. It is not long enough to make a bun, it would be a short ponytail.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby GraphiteGirl » Wed Jul 15, 2009 12:59 am UTC

I wish I had useful hair advice to offer. I've had roughly the same haircut my whole life - slightly fine hair that is very very long, occasionally with layers, and I finally gathered up the courage to get some light fringy stuff done at the front. Oh well, at least there's plenty of hair to work with when doing French braids and things.

Also, parkaboy's makeup shots from the previous page were fantabulous.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby eternal luna » Wed Jul 15, 2009 8:46 am UTC

I had my hair bleached to almost-white yesterday- it's still soft and shiny. :x So far I bleach it, don't use conditioner, rough it up with towels and use the "hot" setting on my hair dryer so that it might fry and frazzle enough to knot up even a little. Grargh.

tin- I'm still loving the 'fro. Add another vote for the blond streak.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Moo » Wed Jul 15, 2009 9:31 am UTC

... and PMS just started. Crampy. Owie.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby PictureSarah » Wed Jul 15, 2009 7:11 pm UTC

It's shark week for me, and I have decided to give the DivaCup another go. The heaviness of my flow is so increased by the IUD that I feel guilty about the number of tampons per day I've been going through. And that's part of what the DivaCup is for, right, to cut down on unnecessary waste? So I tried it last night, and I managed to get it in, semi-comfortably. But it leaked all over the place. Ew. So now I'm trying it again today (after a major tampon leakage issue as well), and so far so good? I think maybe it only works when I'm upright for me, but I can't feel it at all, and I've had it in for over an hour, and nothing bad has happened. I'm hoping I've had a DivaCup epiphany of sorts.

Also, the cramps this month aren't as bad. Or, let me rephrase, they're every bit as bad, but much less frequent. I'm on day 3, and days 1 and 2 were really only crippling for a few 20 minute stretches.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby abitha » Wed Jul 15, 2009 9:33 pm UTC

Are you sure it was in far enough, and that it was popped open completely? It should work whatever position you're in if it's in the right place, as the vaginal muscles form a seal around the edge of the cup.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby jmrz » Thu Jul 16, 2009 10:57 am UTC

Sarah, if you are having problems with leakage, it may not be suctioning properly. I always had problems the first night I had it in until I decided to poke something through the holes to make them a tiny tiny tiny bit wider. Since then, no leakage at all. The spike of an earring will do, or a safety pin. Just something that will fit into the hole without obviously making it bigger.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Enuja » Thu Jul 16, 2009 2:44 pm UTC

I've used the diva cup only on one period so far, but I found that my cervix is so far down during Shark Week that the cup really can't go far in at all. What helped me was to find and feel my cervix, then put the cup in, then check again. I didn't ever actually feel my cervix on the wall of my vagina outside the cup, but I did get leaking several times when I didn't check. Feeling might help you figure out if your problem is like abitha's (not in far enough) or mine (in too far).

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby PictureSarah » Thu Jul 16, 2009 3:35 pm UTC

I think my problem is that it's very difficult to get the silly thing popped open once it's inside. I can't fit two fingers up there to grab it and turn it, like I've heard I'm supposed to do. I haven't managed to get the divacup back in comfortably since the last time. I just don't think there's enough space in there. The tampon leakage was just because of the heaviness of the flow...sadly the ONLY tampons that seem to really work for any length of time for me anymore are the OB super plus absorbency. It's really very discouraging. I hate OB tampons, because I don't like not having an applicator, dry cotton has too much friction to get them up far enough. What I've been doing for the last few days is using a plastic applicator from a Tampax tampon that I just washed well, putting the OB tampon in it, and using it that way. Seems to work ok.

I'm so exhausted and sick of this nonsense. I didn't sleep at all last night because of the heavy bleeding and pain. I feel really nauseous, my mouth inexplicably tastes like blood, it feels likt there is someone with a screw driver behind each hip bone, trying to pop them out of the rest of my pelvis, and the cramps are shooting down my legs and down through my crotch, so basically anything below my mid-thighs and my ribcage is in pain. It's mostly not horrible pain, but present, and present enough to keep me from concentrating on work I need to do, or going running, or having sex, or anything fun.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Moo » Thu Jul 16, 2009 3:44 pm UTC

Fuck. Super hugs, I am grateful to not be you right now.

I never pop out my cup manually, by the way, it just usually goes "POP" 2<x<15 minutes after insertion and makes me jump and pull a face. I can't seem to unpop it either but luckily my flow's not heavy enough for that time to be a problem. I use the punch down fold, I don't know if that can make any difference.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby existential_elevator » Thu Jul 16, 2009 3:54 pm UTC

I am the same as you, Moo. If the pop does not happen, I recommend the stairs or kegels.

and *hugs* for the pain, Sarah. That's kind of how it is 50% of the time for me. Hopefully it'll get easier to deal with. Hot water bottles are generally a good cure, but in this weather it's probably not best.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby podbaydoor » Thu Jul 16, 2009 3:57 pm UTC

My heating pad was pretty much the sole thing keeping me one level down from I-am-going-insane-pain during my abortion process. So...heating pad is recommended.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Enuja » Thu Jul 16, 2009 4:44 pm UTC

All my sympathies, Picture Sarah! That sounds horrendous. I hope you either find ways to make the pain go away or find a better birth control method for you than the copper IUD.

I've never had any trouble getting tampons without applicators in, so it sounds like you and abitha have long, skinny vaginas where I have a short, wide vagina: I've never had any trouble getting anything into or out of it, but I do have trouble with guys going too deep during sex. So you should probably take abitha's advice about how to make the cup painless and leakless. Maybe you need to find a longer and skinnier cup; the livejournal community has a really good size table (second post on this page).

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Sungura » Thu Jul 16, 2009 5:34 pm UTC

I have determined a lot of us who post here must be on about the same cycle considering how as of late people are posting cramp woes. And here is my cramps suck post. >_<

Question: does anyone else get horrible migraines when you get bad cramps too?
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby abitha » Thu Jul 16, 2009 5:40 pm UTC

PictureSarah, you might find it easier with a different folding method. I can't get more than one finger in to pop it open either, but i don't seem to need to anyway if i use the 'origami fold' (third one down on this page), as it sort of pops open in the right place as i'm putting it in. If i'm not sure it's right, i push it about a bit with one finger until i'm sure. Seems like everyone has their own favourite way though, so one of the other folds might work better for you.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Isotope_238 » Thu Jul 16, 2009 5:41 pm UTC

Sungura wrote:Question: does anyone else get horrible migraines when you get bad cramps too?


Are you on BC pills? I got migraines until I stopped taking my pills.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Sungura » Thu Jul 16, 2009 5:50 pm UTC

Nope, I'm not on BC. Just never needed it, no reason to be on it. My mom was on some for not long and it caused major issues and our bodies react almost identically I don't plan on going on it until it is actually needed.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby existential_elevator » Thu Jul 16, 2009 5:54 pm UTC

I understand migraines + BC = increased risk of stroke.

And, well, I find I'm more likely to get migraines pre-sharkyfuntimes, but I've not really tried to correlate it. I'm terrible at noticing stuff like that. But I do know other people who find that ladytimes = migraines.

I do think the woman thread must sync cycles. I blame you for my horrible irregularity. Seriously, my monthly.info graph is like a mountain range.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ » Thu Jul 16, 2009 6:09 pm UTC

existential_elevator wrote:I understand migraines + BC = increased risk of stroke.

Yeah, my doctor looked horrified when I told her I had ocular migraines with an aura.

If you're like me- get off the HBC, cause you may have increased your risk of stroke to something like 30%. Or I am making that up, maybe. 98% of all statistics are false, after all.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Sungura » Thu Jul 16, 2009 6:11 pm UTC

Except...I'm not on any BC at all. I know it's not that :P
I was just wondering in general if anyone noticed correlation or if it's just me.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby (╯°□°)╯︵ ┻━┻ » Thu Jul 16, 2009 6:16 pm UTC

Oh, it's definitely a thing. Not for nothing does cyclespage.com have a check box for 'premenstural headache' when you're recording your data.
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Ell
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Ell » Thu Jul 16, 2009 6:27 pm UTC

existential_elevator wrote:I do think the woman thread must sync cycles. I blame you for my horrible irregularity. Seriously, my monthly.info graph is like a mountain range.

Very much this. I only stopped bleeding 10 days ago and I swear I feel another one coming on after reading this thread.

Fun fact: according to monthlyinfo, the standard deviation of my cycles is 33 days. I don't think it understands missed periods very well. Does anyone else find that annoying? It really throws off the predictions for me...just because my "average" cycle duration is 53 days doesn't mean I'm going to have a 53 day cycle, like, ever. Mathematically correct, perhaps, but totally freaking useless.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby acb » Thu Jul 16, 2009 9:46 pm UTC

I thought you could ignore date ranges on monthlyinfo, but you can only ignore from before a certain date. Would that help at all? Mine are really regular, but I had one very short cycle a couple of months ago which is throwing off the predictions, and it is a pain! The ability to ignore certain "data points" would be handy for more accurate calculations etc, I might send a request.

EDIT: I have sent a feature request through the site, fingers crossed!

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby velvet_octopus » Thu Jul 16, 2009 10:51 pm UTC

Okay, I need to start hanging out in this thread. Seriously.

I really, really love my Diva Cup (used nothing else since I got it in December), but I have had, and hopefully fixed, some of the problems you ladies are describing.

@PictureSarah: I used to have leaking-at-night problems every night my flow was heavy, and I haven't had a leak for several months (cross fingers). I would wake up some time in the morning, and either rolling over or sitting up would cause the seal to open and make a huge mess. I think it might have been an angle issue - the cup feels properly inserted at a range of angles, but I think my vagina (like vaginas in general?) is more tilted than I expect, so now I make sure my cup isn't so vertical. Then there isn't one side that has less contact for suction than the others.

@PictureSarah and Moo (and others): Since I can't always get two fingers in to pop the cup open (it varies by how relaxed I am), I usually insert it, and then pull it back out some, enough to get a grip on it outside of my vagina. Then I turn it until it pops open and push it back in. It's a bit harder to get it back in place this way - I use a my fingers and Kegels to get it back in - but since the rim is already inside I don't have to worry about the fact that it is open. Note: sometimes turning it can take forever for it to open (like, 30-60 sec of just turning if it's really obstinate) which might have been the reason I started doing it that way in the first place - easier to grip, even when I can get two fingers in. If it really won't pop, I try pushing it in farther and then pulling it out a few times, which can re-adjust the folds (somehow, not really sure, but it works.)

And good luck! Since I started having success with my cup I've been trying to convert my friends, most of whom either look interested but very dubious or think I'm crazy, so I really hope it can work better for you.

extra note: my spell checker suggested "vaginae" instead of "vaginas", and that makes me very happy (3 semesters of Latin :D original meaning: sheath )
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Sungura » Fri Jul 17, 2009 12:20 am UTC

Maybe in a few months I'll be brave enough to try this diva cup. It sounds nice to not have to mess with pads all the time, and a lot less wasteful. But...it just makes me cringe to think of trying to use it as it just sounds painful, although I'm sure it isn't or you all wouldn't use it, haha.
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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Isotope_238 » Fri Jul 17, 2009 12:55 am UTC

The diva cup sounds wonderful and convenient and all that, but I don't think I could voluntarily insert something into my vagina. Just thinking about my one and only experience with something being inserted into my vagina still makes me cringe. In any case, it's not something I want to talk to my parents about, nor could I get a diva cup without them finding out.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Enuja » Fri Jul 17, 2009 1:13 am UTC

Absolutely, you must be comfortable with putting things in your vagina in order to use menstrual cups. However, it doesn't hurt at all (if you're doing it right). Isotope_238, if you'd have to talk to parents about a cup, doesn't that mean that you'd have to talk to your parents about tampons and pads, as well? Why is it worse to talk about a re-usable silicon cup instead of disposable pads? I'd recommend that you get comfortable with inserting your fingerd into your vagina before you consider a cup, but I think you should definitely bring it up with your parents, if you're interested.

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Re: [SAFESPACE] Woman Thread-The thread that gives (every month)

Postby Akira » Fri Jul 17, 2009 2:20 am UTC

Enuja wrote:I'd recommend that you get comfortable with inserting your fingerd into your vagina before you consider a cup, but I think you should definitely bring it up with your parents, if you're interested.


I think that's probably part of the problem, if I may put in.

My family's pretty open about stuff, but I wouldn't even consider talking to either of my parents about anything involving fingers and vaginas (vaginae?).
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