Best error messages?

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NMcCoy
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby NMcCoy » Fri Mar 14, 2008 8:42 am UTC

Not really an error message, but a wonderfully surreal prompt from Windows when taken out of context.

"Click this balloon to start the wizard."
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lowbart
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby lowbart » Fri Mar 14, 2008 5:19 pm UTC

NMcCoy wrote:"Click this balloon to start the wizard."


vr-r-r-r-vrr-rooommmmm.
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doc leech
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby doc leech » Fri Mar 14, 2008 7:56 pm UTC

My favorite is from a program used at work: "Error: There is no going back"

What's this program know that I don't? Ominous...
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby edge walker » Sat Mar 15, 2008 8:09 pm UTC

“A friend of mine in a compiler writing class produced a compiler with one error message ‘you lied to me when you told me this was a program’.”
Pete Fenelon

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Re:

Postby edge walker » Sat Mar 15, 2008 8:24 pm UTC

FACM wrote:I think the Linux kernel still supports the "printer on fire" error message.

It was taken out a while ago AFAIK.

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby '; DROP DATABASE;-- » Sun Mar 16, 2008 7:54 pm UTC

lowbart wrote:
NMcCoy wrote:"Click this balloon to start the wizard."


vr-r-r-r-vrr-rooommmmm.
No, it's The Wizard.
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby The Hyphenator » Mon Mar 17, 2008 1:21 pm UTC

On the TI-83/84 calculators, if you guess x as an obscenely large number in the equation solver, it gives you ERR:BAD GUESS. I was laughing for far too long after discovering that...
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby keozen » Mon Mar 17, 2008 1:46 pm UTC

:
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Moo » Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:19 pm UTC

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby MFHodge » Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:50 pm UTC

I get this error message whenever I plug any USB device into this ancient laptop:
fasterUSB.PNG
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But guess what?
nonefound.PNG
nonefound.PNG (15.96 KiB) Viewed 5112 times


Do we really need to keep going through this, Windows?
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby SecondTalon » Mon Mar 17, 2008 2:55 pm UTC

That's just Windows saying "Ha ha! You have a shitty computer!"
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Artemisia
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Artemisia » Mon Mar 17, 2008 3:29 pm UTC

I hate that message too. It's pointing out the obvious :|
I guess windows was designed for morons who don't KNOW that there is anything faster on the market
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Mr. Mack » Mon Mar 17, 2008 3:50 pm UTC

I used to get that message all the time. Now I have a new computer, and I only get that message some of the time.
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i like pi
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby i like pi » Mon Mar 17, 2008 6:09 pm UTC

So like I clicked one of those spam E-mails one time... on accident. Anyway, the error message that popped up was: Warning, you're computer will die if you shut down. Please press Okay to continue with computer restart.
Or something to that effect. Hell, I don't know.

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Amnesiasoft » Mon Mar 17, 2008 6:26 pm UTC

Image
I just made this the other day for this weeks Cracked Photoshop competition. The fact I didn't touch Photoshop, or even an image editor, is beside the point.

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby NMcCoy » Mon Mar 17, 2008 6:56 pm UTC

Props for the Star Fox 64 reference. :)
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby '; DROP DATABASE;-- » Tue Mar 18, 2008 1:41 am UTC

VTHodge wrote:I get this error message whenever I plug any USB device into this ancient laptop:
I get that too. It tells me this can be faster in a USB 2.0 port, except it's in a USB 2.0 port. :roll:
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby '; DROP DATABASE;-- » Tue Mar 18, 2008 7:33 am UTC

Did you know Windows XP automatically hacks into wireless networks?
Spoiler:
secure wifi.png
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I wasn't able to actually use the connection though. :(
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margeman2k3
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby margeman2k3 » Tue Mar 18, 2008 8:39 am UTC

I've tried to hijack a signal here and there with XP, but since I didn't have the key, it can't send/receive any data.

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Dark Ragnarok » Thu Mar 20, 2008 3:43 am UTC

When I used backtrack to decrypt a WEP key and it said KEY found. When I used it on the network it said that it couldn't connect.... And it was not MAC filtered.

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Vanguard » Tue Mar 25, 2008 3:06 pm UTC

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby SirKillalot » Sun Mar 30, 2008 2:37 pm UTC

Often, when I try to start Steam in offline mode, to play single-player games on my laptop on a trip, for example, it tells me that it has no internet connection (not surprisingly) and asks what I want it to do. So I tell it to "Start in offline mode." It immediately follows this with "Could not connect to the Steam network. This may indicate a problem with your internet connection."

But it doesn't do this all the time, so of course when I tried to get screenshots to post here, it started up fine.
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Sungura
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Sungura » Sun Mar 30, 2008 3:03 pm UTC

Computer cannot detect keyboard.
Press any key to continue.

Yeah, kinda cliche I know - but I DID get that error message!
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Dropzone
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Dropzone » Sun Mar 30, 2008 5:39 pm UTC

Foxit Reader seems to be alarmed about something, but it's not going to say what:
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby benjhuey » Sun Mar 30, 2008 6:07 pm UTC

Dropzone wrote:Foxit Reader seems to be alarmed about something, but it's not going to say what:

I seem to remember getting error messages like these, just saying there is an error, but not what the error is (usually on specialized electronics).
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Æshættr
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Æshættr » Mon Mar 31, 2008 3:19 pm UTC

Reminds me of a bash.org quote:

<nemovc>i once found the text strings stored in the bios of my old 286. not far from the standard "Keyboard error, press F1 to continue." message was "CPU not found. System halted."
<nemovc>i always wondered how they intended to display that message

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Chrismclegless » Mon Mar 31, 2008 4:13 pm UTC

I get one every time my desktop starts up (I'm on my laptop atm so I can't post it), that just says "fAIL". No title bar or anything.
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby schmiggen » Tue Apr 01, 2008 10:51 pm UTC

Sierra wrote:Your version (0.25034.0.0) of Tribes 2 is out of date, but there are no updates to update Tribes 2 to the latest version.



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Re: Best error messages?

Postby 1337geek » Tue Apr 01, 2008 11:39 pm UTC

From Uncyclopedia. Inside a spoiler because it's large.

Spoiler:
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby GuitarFreak » Wed Apr 02, 2008 2:03 am UTC

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby thedufer » Wed Apr 02, 2008 3:04 am UTC

I'm not sure what its supposed to mean, but WC3Banlist occasionally errors during its shutdown procedure. The error forces it to shut down. I can't get it to do it now, but the message is titled "Error" and contains the text "Catastrophic failure." Note the use of a period over an exclamation mark. In addition to the lack of any information whatsoever. All I can do is press "OK" and hope my computer doesn't burst into flames.

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Babam » Wed Apr 02, 2008 4:37 am UTC

Halo CE has some of the best errors.
When you edit vital tags, and make what is called a crash map, debug.txt promptly says " Idiot, dont edit that, here we fixed it, but dont do it again."
Also when CE crashed one time it promptly said
Oh noes
------------
Something fucked up!

lemme dig around for a SS
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby eristic » Wed Apr 02, 2008 5:50 am UTC

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby atrain » Wed Apr 02, 2008 7:11 pm UTC

MFHodge wrote:I get this error message whenever I plug any USB device into this ancient laptop:
fasterUSB.PNG



But guess what?
nonefound.PNG


Do we really need to keep going through this, Windows?

God I hate that. I really wish it could be disabled.

I had a POC noname MP3 player from china, who's software was lots of fun.
"Cannot access device while it is connected to computer, please connect it to computer"
and lots of other stupidity.

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Goplat » Thu Apr 03, 2008 12:38 am UTC

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby LittleChrist » Thu Apr 03, 2008 3:43 am UTC

I had a game once that would freeze and crash prompting an error message:
"This program has encountered a double-header and has been closed."
Edit: This was a long time ago on Windows 95. The game..."Sesame Street: Get Set To Learn"
To this day I have no idea what it meant.

At work, when we put a sales order into the computer with a past date, we get an amusing error message (at the bottom (censored because I like my job))
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby DaMullet » Sun Apr 06, 2008 3:11 am UTC

LittleChrist wrote:I had a game once that would freeze and crash prompting an error message:
"This program has encountered a double-header and has been closed."
Edit: This was a long time ago on Windows 95. The game..."Sesame Street: Get Set To Learn"
To this day I have no idea what it meant.

The programmers knocked off work early that day to catch the ball game.
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Amnesiasoft
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Amnesiasoft » Sun Apr 06, 2008 3:16 am UTC

NMcCoy wrote:Props for the Star Fox 64 reference. :)

What, mine? What Star Fox reference? The only thing I know of Star Fox is "Press Z or R twice to do a barrel roll!"

Anyway, I found a great one from the Acid3 test: Test 80 failed: kungFuDeathGrip was null

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Re: Best error messages?

Postby x-Swamp » Sun Apr 06, 2008 5:20 am UTC

I can remember in year 7, i found the use of "net send [username] [message]". That freaked a few people out until the admin disabled the messenger service.

Damn that was a fun year.


On another note, there was a nice error in an app (freeware) i used a while ago. It said something like "you suck. you must be [beaver] [stupid].

I clicked beaver and it closed. I wonder to this day what would have happened if i had clicked stupid.
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Re: Best error messages?

Postby Bosonator » Sun Apr 06, 2008 1:15 pm UTC

"Windows Error Reporter: Windows Error Reporter has crashed. Send error report?"

Dam, I wish I still had that screenshot. 8)
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