Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Rot your brains, then rot our boards

Moderators: SecondTalon, Moderators General, Prelates

User avatar
Alisto
Crazy like a BOX!
Posts: 3998
Joined: Sun Nov 26, 2006 9:14 pm UTC
Location: South Jersey
Contact:

Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Postby Alisto » Mon Aug 06, 2007 1:34 am UTC

I am currently watching this movie. I came in about halfway through and have only been watching it for 30 minutes. I have never read any of the Narnia books.

That being said, I despise this movie already. The main reason? These kids are the most insufferable little twats I've ever had the misfortune of seeing on screen.

But I'm going to stick it through. Let's see how it ends.
Bad grammar makes me [sic].
Crazy like a BOX!
<Jauss> Because karaoke, especially karaoke + lesbians = Alisto, amirite?
<rachel> Old people ain't got shit to do but look at clocks.

User avatar
SpitValve
Not a mod.
Posts: 5129
Joined: Tue Sep 26, 2006 9:51 am UTC
Location: Lower pork village

Postby SpitValve » Mon Aug 06, 2007 2:16 am UTC

The new movie I assume?

I reckon it's ... ok-ish. Didn't bug me at all, but didn't really inspire any emotions of any particular sort either.

User avatar
parkaboy
who dwells between the borders of time
Posts: 5539
Joined: Sun Jun 17, 2007 1:17 am UTC
Location: la-la land
Contact:

Postby parkaboy » Mon Aug 06, 2007 2:18 am UTC

they get better. eventually.
Image

Back in our day we had to walk uphill both ways through the snow on fire without feet to get fucking terrible relationship advice from disinterested and socially maladjusted nerds. Belial

User avatar
Memo
Posts: 255
Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2007 3:36 pm UTC
Location: Chile
Contact:

Postby Memo » Mon Aug 06, 2007 2:26 am UTC

I didn't care about the movie, but it felt like one of those paid church tv shows.

User avatar
Rodan
Any title.
Posts: 1846
Joined: Thu May 17, 2007 11:52 pm UTC
Location: Eastern Standard Time

Postby Rodan » Mon Aug 06, 2007 3:21 am UTC

All I know is my mom absolutely loved it.
I thought it was all right.

User avatar
GhostWolfe
Broken wings and scattered feathers
Posts: 3892
Joined: Fri May 11, 2007 11:56 am UTC
Location: Brisbane, Aust
Contact:

Postby GhostWolfe » Mon Aug 06, 2007 3:55 am UTC

If I recall the book correctly, they are meant to be insufferable little twats. Part of the story is their growth from your run of the mill bored little dipsticks to noble and gracious well developed pre-teens.

It's fantasy, these things can happen.
Linguistic Anarchist
Hawknc: ANGELL IS SERIOUS BUSINESS :-[
lesliesage: Animals dunked in crude oil: sad. Animals dunked in boiling oil: tasty.
Belial: I was in your mom's room all night committing to a series of extended military actions.

User avatar
Bakemaster
pretty nice future dick
Posts: 8933
Joined: Fri Jul 06, 2007 2:33 pm UTC
Location: One of those hot places

Postby Bakemaster » Mon Aug 06, 2007 4:25 am UTC

Movie sucked the almighty nut, as my sister would say.
Image
c0 = 2.13085531 × 1014 smoots per fortnight
"Apparently you can't summon an alternate timeline clone of your inner demon, guys! Remember that." —Noc

User avatar
une see
Is my girl
Posts: 1038
Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2007 8:31 pm UTC
Location: a tenuous grip on reality
Contact:

Postby une see » Mon Aug 06, 2007 4:32 am UTC

When I saw the movie, I was a little...preoccupied, so I could have been paying more attention. Thusly, I don't really remember the characters at all, although I'm pretty sure I didn't like them too much. (Oh, and my friend thought, um...the eldest brother was hot? But she thinks Malfoy is hot, as well, so we can't really trust her judgment on these things...)

However, I do remember something about Aslan and the witch engaging in...questionable activities. Of the sexual kind. Was this in the movie?? Or the books, at least? I, uh...I hope I didn't just imagine that. Because that would be quite troubling. Quite.
T.S. Eliot in "The Waste Land" wrote:APRIL is the cruellest month, breeding
Lilacs out of the dead land, mixing
Memory and desire, stirring
Dull roots with spring rain.

User avatar
Rodan
Any title.
Posts: 1846
Joined: Thu May 17, 2007 11:52 pm UTC
Location: Eastern Standard Time

Postby Rodan » Mon Aug 06, 2007 4:44 am UTC

um... no. I don't believe the witch fucked the lion.

Gadren
Posts: 466
Joined: Sat Mar 31, 2007 6:54 pm UTC

Postby Gadren » Mon Aug 06, 2007 5:22 am UTC

My main feeling toward Narnia is "meh." I just don't like getting hit over the head repeatedly with blatant allegory.

User avatar
Zohar
COMMANDER PORN
Posts: 8515
Joined: Fri Apr 27, 2007 8:45 pm UTC
Location: Denver

Postby Zohar » Mon Aug 06, 2007 12:15 pm UTC

I have no problem ignoring the religious overtones in Narnia and I enjoy it quite a bit. As for the movie, I liked it, there were some very cool parts (phoenix sweeping across the battlefield?). There's a blatant continuity error though (Lucy gives Tumnus her handkerchief twice) but apart for that...
Mighty Jalapeno: "See, Zohar agrees, and he's nice to people."
SecondTalon: "Still better looking than Jesus."

Not how I say my name

User avatar
Alisto
Crazy like a BOX!
Posts: 3998
Joined: Sun Nov 26, 2006 9:14 pm UTC
Location: South Jersey
Contact:

Postby Alisto » Mon Aug 06, 2007 2:12 pm UTC

une see wrote:When I saw the movie, I was a little...preoccupied, so I could have been paying more attention.


How you doin'?
Bad grammar makes me [sic].
Crazy like a BOX!
<Jauss> Because karaoke, especially karaoke + lesbians = Alisto, amirite?
<rachel> Old people ain't got shit to do but look at clocks.

User avatar
__Kit
Posts: 1576
Joined: Tue May 08, 2007 5:12 am UTC
Location: 16/M/NZ
Contact:

Postby __Kit » Tue Aug 07, 2007 5:48 am UTC

Gah, I hate these characters the don't actually work hard/do anything to achieve their status/position, they didn't have to work in the movie, they were just part of some prophecy and then they were regarded as heroes, its unrealistic.

That kinda didn't make sense. I hate it when it happens in books as well.
=]

User avatar
GhostWolfe
Broken wings and scattered feathers
Posts: 3892
Joined: Fri May 11, 2007 11:56 am UTC
Location: Brisbane, Aust
Contact:

Postby GhostWolfe » Tue Aug 07, 2007 6:26 am UTC

__Kit wrote:Gah, I hate these characters the don't actually work hard/do anything to achieve their status/position, they didn't have to work in the movie, they were just part of some prophecy and then they were regarded as heroes, its unrealistic.

So, taking up arms and joining battle against the foes of good is... Well, okay, it's not "working" per se, but I'd say it certainly counts as "doing something" for the positions and titles they achieved by the end of the story.

Also: overcoming their previous selfish and prideful selves is a pretty nice achievement too.
Linguistic Anarchist
Hawknc: ANGELL IS SERIOUS BUSINESS :-[
lesliesage: Animals dunked in crude oil: sad. Animals dunked in boiling oil: tasty.
Belial: I was in your mom's room all night committing to a series of extended military actions.

User avatar
marshlight
Posts: 877
Joined: Fri Dec 22, 2006 5:26 pm UTC
Location: Pittsburgh, PA
Contact:

Postby marshlight » Tue Aug 07, 2007 7:19 pm UTC

I guess I'm in the minority here, but I liked the movie. Though this may have very much to do with the fact that, when I was in 5th grade, one of my best friends and I split the part of Tumnus during our school show. And it was a long time ago, but embedded memories with half-remembered lines and all that.. makes up for a bit of the more annoying spots. Didn't hurt that this Tumnus was just a little bit cute also.

I also tended to take the meaning very simply. It wasn't until much later that I figured out the whole religion correlation thing, because that just wasn't how I was thinking about the play at the time. Yay being dense!

This is full of more embarrassing confessions than I had realized....
Belial wrote:Time to hide in the CAVE OF AWESOME.

User avatar
Vaniver
Posts: 9422
Joined: Fri Oct 13, 2006 2:12 am UTC

Postby Vaniver » Tue Aug 07, 2007 7:53 pm UTC

The movie was decent to good. The books were great.
I mostly post over at LessWrong now.

Avatar from My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, owned by Hasbro.

User avatar
Phenriz
I'm daaancin' like a monkey!
Posts: 2450
Joined: Fri Apr 06, 2007 10:33 pm UTC
Contact:

Postby Phenriz » Tue Aug 07, 2007 8:23 pm UTC

Good movie, i fail to see how religious overtones make it "bad"
I loveded you piggy, i lovded youuuu!!!

User avatar
Castaway
Mr. Fancy-Pants
Posts: 2150
Joined: Wed Apr 11, 2007 1:05 am UTC
Location: Brooklyn
Contact:

Postby Castaway » Tue Aug 07, 2007 9:09 pm UTC

I thought that movie was hilariously bad. Now the only thing I remember about it is the Lazy Sunday references.
You've just lost twenty dollars and my self respect.

Rat wrote: so i sprinted back down this hill like a fucking mountain goat

User avatar
bbctol
Super Deluxe Forum Title of DESTINYâ„¢
Posts: 3137
Joined: Tue Mar 06, 2007 10:27 pm UTC
Location: The Twilight Zone
Contact:

Postby bbctol » Tue Aug 07, 2007 9:11 pm UTC

The movie sucked. The books were good. 'Nuff said.

User avatar
mosc
Doesn't care what you think.
Posts: 5401
Joined: Fri May 11, 2007 3:03 pm UTC

Postby mosc » Tue Aug 07, 2007 9:48 pm UTC

I didn't mind the religion part. If I counted how many movies had resurrection of a savior type character, I'd go insane. I never liked the book much to begin with so I didn't have high hopes for the movie. I was particularly frustrated at the battle scene where the kids fought with the best of em. The overly dramatized lion death was and unnecessary lean on the religious part of it though.
Title: It was given by the XKCD moderators to me because they didn't care what I thought (I made some rantings, etc). I care what YOU think, the joke is forums.xkcd doesn't care what I think.

User avatar
Memo
Posts: 255
Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2007 3:36 pm UTC
Location: Chile
Contact:

Postby Memo » Tue Aug 07, 2007 10:44 pm UTC

I just realized how cool would be if the bible told the story about how Jesus revived at the third day and bit the face off of the guy who pierced him with a spear.

User avatar
bbctol
Super Deluxe Forum Title of DESTINYâ„¢
Posts: 3137
Joined: Tue Mar 06, 2007 10:27 pm UTC
Location: The Twilight Zone
Contact:

Postby bbctol » Tue Aug 07, 2007 11:33 pm UTC

Memo wrote:I just realized how cool would be if the bible told the story about how Jesus revived at the third day and bit the face off of the guy who pierced him with a spear.


And then ate his brains, of course. ZOMBIE JESUS!

Saw this painting on vacation, and all I could think was ZOMBIE JESUS.

Image

User avatar
fjafjan
THE fjafjan
Posts: 4766
Joined: Fri Oct 06, 2006 12:22 pm UTC
Location: Down south up north in the west of eastern west.
Contact:

Postby fjafjan » Wed Aug 08, 2007 3:50 am UTC

The movie was aweful, it was a comedy. Watched it with a friend and we laughed through many of the "dramatic sequences". Like when peter is keeping the wolves away under the melting waterfall. It's rediculous. And the end is also hillarious, they show up, employ aweful strategies that kill most of the animals, and then they make them queens/kings. What?
//Yepp, THE fjafjan (who's THE fjafjan?)
Liza wrote:Fjafjan, your hair is so lovely that I want to go to Sweden, collect the bit you cut off in your latest haircut and keep it in my room, and smell it. And eventually use it to complete my shrine dedicated to you.

User avatar
Narsil
Ask me about my junk!
Posts: 2995
Joined: Thu Oct 26, 2006 6:59 pm UTC
Location: Columbus.

Postby Narsil » Wed Aug 08, 2007 3:54 am UTC

Movie sucked, but the source material was pretty lame too.
And I do not mean The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe.
Spoiler:
EsotericWombat wrote:MORE JUNK THAN YOUR BODY HAS ROOM FOR

Mother Superior wrote:What's he got that I dont?
*sees Narsil's sig*
Oh... that.

User avatar
Devilsaur
Posts: 306
Joined: Wed Jul 18, 2007 4:45 am UTC

Postby Devilsaur » Wed Aug 08, 2007 5:38 am UTC

I tried watching this with friends (I don't know why) and we* couldn't make it half way despite someone believing it got better by the end. We even skipped to the part where they got weapons, in hopes of a fight scene to redeem the movie.
spoiler wrote:We were greatly disappointed.


By the way, watching it is so uneasy with how creepy and borderline pedophilic some of the characters are. Someone also pointed out satyrs are sex demons. :roll:
If you want to see creepy done right, check out Pan's Labyrinth.

* I gave up after the first train scene

User avatar
German Sausage
3 of 5
Posts: 2933
Joined: Mon Jan 01, 2007 9:45 am UTC

Postby German Sausage » Wed Aug 08, 2007 10:35 am UTC

the older films are great - the british ones that do all the books. my favourite was The Silver Chair
<bakemaster> Only German Sausage can prevent forest fires
<felstaff> Hype is like a giant disappointment ray aimed squarely at the finished article.
<watson> Treat me like a criminal, Holmes!
TMT4L

GMontag
Posts: 209
Joined: Mon Apr 16, 2007 5:47 am UTC
Location: Bellingham, Washington

Postby GMontag » Sat Aug 18, 2007 7:12 pm UTC

German Sausage wrote:the older films are great - the british ones that do all the books. my favourite was The Silver Chair


They only did the first four books. Which is too bad, because my favorite book has always been The Magician's Nephew.

User avatar
MEGAMERICAN
Posts: 15
Joined: Mon Aug 13, 2007 6:48 pm UTC
Location: MN

Postby MEGAMERICAN » Sat Aug 18, 2007 7:56 pm UTC

The movie and the book were ok. I think it was the first book I've read in less time than the movie.

The allegory didn't bother me any. It's not like Jesus was an original story 2000 years ago (or many stories in the Bible for that matter).

User avatar
LE4dGOLEM
is unique......wait, no!!!!
Posts: 5972
Joined: Thu Oct 12, 2006 7:10 pm UTC
Location: :uoıʇɐɔol

Postby LE4dGOLEM » Sat Aug 18, 2007 9:05 pm UTC

GMontag wrote:
German Sausage wrote:the older films are great - the british ones that do all the books. my favourite was The Silver Chair


They only did the first four books. Which is too bad, because my favorite book has always been The Magician's Nephew.


...which was the very first book...
Image Une See Fights - crayon super-ish hero webcomic!
doogly wrote:It would just be much better if it were not shitty.

GMontag
Posts: 209
Joined: Mon Apr 16, 2007 5:47 am UTC
Location: Bellingham, Washington

Postby GMontag » Sun Aug 19, 2007 2:46 am UTC

LE4dGOLEM wrote:
GMontag wrote:
German Sausage wrote:the older films are great - the british ones that do all the books. my favourite was The Silver Chair


They only did the first four books. Which is too bad, because my favorite book has always been The Magician's Nephew.


...which was the very first book...


I was talking about the order they were written in. Not this new reordering by story chronology.

User avatar
damienthebloody
the most metal thing EVER
Posts: 2370
Joined: Sat Feb 17, 2007 2:25 pm UTC
Location: under a rock

Postby damienthebloody » Sun Aug 19, 2007 2:00 pm UTC

une see wrote:However, I do remember something about Aslan and the witch engaging in...questionable activities. Of the sexual kind. Was this in the movie?? Or the books, at least? I, uh...I hope I didn't just imagine that. Because that would be quite troubling. Quite.

They don't, but a recently published Neil Gaiman short story involves a character who dreams about that. That might be where you're getting it from.

Personally, I don't want to see the movie at all. I'm still angry at C.S. Lewis for raping my childhood with his not-even-allegorical stories (he says they aren't allegory, they're literally an exploration of Christ in an alternate world).
German Sausage wrote:Is that an EMP in your pants, or are you just outraged by my sexist behaviour?
liza wrote:When life gives you a wife made of salt, make margaritas?
Dance like you're stamping on a human face forever.

User avatar
Rodan
Any title.
Posts: 1846
Joined: Thu May 17, 2007 11:52 pm UTC
Location: Eastern Standard Time

Postby Rodan » Sun Aug 19, 2007 5:41 pm UTC

GMontag wrote:
LE4dGOLEM wrote:
GMontag wrote:
German Sausage wrote:the older films are great - the british ones that do all the books. my favourite was The Silver Chair


They only did the first four books. Which is too bad, because my favorite book has always been The Magician's Nephew.


...which was the very first book...


I was talking about the order they were written in. Not this new reordering by story chronology.

reordering=very very bad.

User avatar
podbaydoor
Posts: 7548
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2007 4:16 am UTC
Location: spaceship somewhere out there

Re: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Postby podbaydoor » Wed Jan 16, 2008 7:34 am UTC

Prince Caspian

The good news: WHEE YAY IT'S FINISHED!! And it looks great!

The bad news: Trailers can be horribly misleading, but it looks like the plot may have been shredded in favor of injecting more LotR-style action. Bugger.
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

User avatar
pieaholicx
The cake is a lie!
Posts: 531
Joined: Mon Oct 22, 2007 12:51 pm UTC
Contact:

Re: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Postby pieaholicx » Wed Jan 16, 2008 12:56 pm UTC

podbaydoor wrote:The bad news: Trailers can be horribly misleading, but it looks like the plot may have been shredded in favor of injecting more LotR-style action. Bugger.

Ugh, lame.

Oh well, since I'm already thinking beyond that, what guesses on the next story to be made? If they're going by the order in which they were made, then Dawn Treader is next, however I'm personally hoping for The Horse and His Boy, or Magician's Nephew.
It's okay, I'm Chaotic Neutral. I can kill him over the loot.
Overexposure to pieaholicx may, in semi-rare cases, emancipate dental fillings, crowns, tooth enamel, and teeth.

User avatar
podbaydoor
Posts: 7548
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2007 4:16 am UTC
Location: spaceship somewhere out there

Re: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Postby podbaydoor » Wed Jan 16, 2008 5:30 pm UTC

Dawn Treader is probably next if Prince Caspian succeeds, because the audience/fangirls (did you see his HAIR?) will have been introduced and familiarized with Caspian by then.

Also, they're probably going to do all the movies with the England-Pevensies (as opposed to the adult Narnia-Pevensies) first in order to use the LWW actors as much as possible, before their appearances change too much. Horse and His Boy is my favorite book and would be insanely perfect for a movie adaptation, but it introduces all-new characters and the Pevensies that appear are the adult versions. Maybe by the time they get around to it, the original actors will have grown up enough to be plausible...but probably not.

It's sort of a fannish trend in fanfiction to pair Lucy up with Caspian in Dawn Treader...it would be interesting to see if the movie-makers do that. They're always looking for ways to "punch up" the original plotlines, after all.
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

User avatar
tzar1990
Posts: 52
Joined: Mon Dec 17, 2007 5:57 am UTC

Re: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Postby tzar1990 » Sun May 25, 2008 11:37 pm UTC

Oh dear... I REALLY hope that they don't attempt to pull off a stupid Caspian/Lucy subplot when they make Dawn Treader... That's my favorite book in the series, and I don't need them ruining those memories. If I wanted stupid pairings, I'd go to read fanfiction.

Also, I think that they're probably doing the right thing by making the movies out of chronological order. I've always found it easier to read them in published order, as that way you get more foreshadowing and stuff.
The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper. ~Eden Phillpotts, A Shadow Passes

User avatar
JayDee
Posts: 3620
Joined: Sat Nov 10, 2007 3:13 am UTC
Location: Most livable city in the world.
Contact:

Re: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Postby JayDee » Mon May 26, 2008 11:39 am UTC

podbaydoor wrote:Also, they're probably going to do all the movies with the England-Pevensies (as opposed to the adult Narnia-Pevensies) first in order to use the LWW actors as much as possible, before their appearances change too much.
I'm fairly sure I read that this is why Prince Caspian was made second. Random linky. Thank you Wikipedia references...
The Mighty Thesaurus wrote:I believe that everything can and must be joked about.
Hawknc wrote:I like to think that he hasn't left, he's just finally completed his foe list.

Joeldi
Posts: 1055
Joined: Sat Feb 17, 2007 1:49 am UTC
Location: Central Queensland, Australia
Contact:

Re: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Postby Joeldi » Tue May 27, 2008 12:47 am UTC

1) I read every Narnia book all it once in a big collection book thing. I hated every minute of it, except for The Magicians Nephew.

2) They aren't making them out of order, they just skipped A Horse and his Boy because it's racist as hell.

3) I'm pretty sick of all this "Religious allegory" talk. I see the whole thing as a story about kids in a magical land with talking animals and a few epic fights between good and evil. Who cares if the Lion created the earth or was reincarnated or something. In fact I can't even remember what was so damn ZOMG BIBLE about it.
I already have a hate thread. Necromancy > redundancy here, so post there.

roc314 wrote:America is a police state that communicates in txt speak...

"i hav teh dissentors brb""¡This cheese is burning me! u pwnd them bff""thx ur cool 2"

User avatar
Sartorius
Posts: 506
Joined: Sun Jul 29, 2007 6:21 am UTC
Location: Oh? Hi! Oh.

Re: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Postby Sartorius » Tue May 27, 2008 3:22 am UTC

To echo a few posts here, I was not impressed with the movie. It didn't develop the characters, especially Aslan and why the hell the children should love him so much, nearly enough. To explain the "religious allegory," when I was little I read it simply as it was. With the movie, there seemed to be no other way to interpret it other than "OMGZORZ ASLAN REPRESENTS JESUS!11!!!one" and I'd prefer not to be bashed over the head with that as much as I was in that movie. But I live in the Bible Belt, so that may color my opinion.
"Give a man a fire and he's warm for the day. But set fire to him and he's warm for the rest of his life." -Terry Pratchett

User avatar
tzar1990
Posts: 52
Joined: Mon Dec 17, 2007 5:57 am UTC

Re: Chronicles of Narnia: The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe

Postby tzar1990 » Wed May 28, 2008 2:44 am UTC

They aren't making them out of order, they just skipped A Horse and his Boy because it's racist as hell.


Actually, if you're going by the order where The Horse and His Boy goes in between The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe and Prince Caspian, they missed The Magician's Nephew, too.
The universe is full of magical things patiently waiting for our wits to grow sharper. ~Eden Phillpotts, A Shadow Passes


Return to “Movies and TV Shows”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 8 guests