Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Apparently, people like to eat.

Moderators: SecondTalon, Moderators General, Prelates

User avatar
Rhubarbed
Posts: 10
Joined: Mon Feb 23, 2009 3:02 pm UTC

Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Rhubarbed » Wed Feb 25, 2009 1:27 am UTC

It appears that rapidly solidifying caramel syrup and a tongue piercing combine to create a THING THAT WAS NOT MEANT TO BE...

I shall have to be more careful about that in future...
Equals capital d

Jinx
Posts: 20
Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2007 10:56 am UTC

Re: Merry Hell

Postby Jinx » Wed Feb 25, 2009 3:40 am UTC

On the subject of perils via saucy things...

I was making gumbo at my store this whole past weekend, and was reminded of one of my former Chef-instructors who used to be the soup-guy at Brennan's of LA. Among his duties: making the gumbo. While making the infamous "brick roux" that is quintessential to any gumbo, there was a bubble in the pot that splattered up, and landed square on the back of his wrist. They don't call it "cajun napalm" for nothing- he still has a quarter-sized scar there from the burn it inflicted.

User avatar
gerb
Posts: 140
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2009 6:34 am UTC
Location: Pennsylvania

Re: Merry Hell

Postby gerb » Wed Feb 25, 2009 5:02 pm UTC

I now have a pretty good fear of tongue piercings...

Most any time I make a roux it decides to jump up and bite me. :-/
So far nothing so bad that the burn doesn't go away in a couple weeks, though.
"In a world where derivatives change functions into other functions...one constant will stand alone....This summer, Leonhard Euler is...ex..."
-Sir_Elderberry

Mikeski
Posts: 1099
Joined: Sun Jan 13, 2008 7:24 am UTC
Location: Minnesota, USA

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Mikeski » Thu Feb 26, 2009 12:16 am UTC

Yeah, that dark cajun roux is dangerous. I've gotten second-degree burns on my ring & pinky finger from a splash of it. I now wear kitchen gloves for that part of the gumbo-making process, big wuss that I am.

User avatar
cerbie
Posts: 934
Joined: Sat Jul 05, 2008 5:14 am UTC
Location: USA

Re: Merry Hell

Postby cerbie » Thu Feb 26, 2009 7:28 pm UTC

Jinx wrote:On the subject of perils via saucy things...

I was making gumbo at my store this whole past weekend, and was reminded of one of my former Chef-instructors who used to be the soup-guy at Brennan's of LA. Among his duties: making the gumbo. While making the infamous "brick roux" that is quintessential to any gumbo, there was a bubble in the gumdrops that splattered up, and landed square on the back of his wrist. They don't call it "cajun napalm" for nothing- he still has a quarter-sized scar there from the burn it inflicted.
I don't have a scar, by some strange luck, but I got a burn that took a full year to heal on my stomach from making a roux for a gumbo.
DSenette: (...) on the whole, even a trained killer cow is kind of stupid.

User avatar
podbaydoor
Posts: 7548
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2007 4:16 am UTC
Location: spaceship somewhere out there

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby podbaydoor » Fri Feb 27, 2009 6:45 pm UTC

I wasn't able to convince my ex to cook bacon naked precisely because of this reason.
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

Jinx
Posts: 20
Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2007 10:56 am UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Jinx » Sat Feb 28, 2009 5:07 am UTC

podbaydoor wrote:I wasn't able to convince my ex to cook bacon naked precisely because of this reason.


^very similar to a conversation i had with a coworker once...

Me: "Yeah, i learned the other day to make sure to put a shirt on when i start making breakfast in the morning... bacon and eggs burn something fierce."

Lady coworker: "Yeah.. that's how i learned i shouldn't cook breakfast naked."

Me: :shock:

AntonGarou
Posts: 121
Joined: Mon Aug 18, 2008 11:17 am UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby AntonGarou » Mon Mar 02, 2009 4:02 pm UTC

Deep frying is my personal enemy.Every time I try anything involving deep frying I get splashed- it ruined two of my favorite t-shirts before I started becoming paranoid about wearing an apron.
I'm not nitpicking, I'm quarkpicking!

Dani
Posts: 24
Joined: Sun Mar 01, 2009 5:00 pm UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Dani » Mon Mar 02, 2009 9:13 pm UTC

I... don't cook.

I burn my tongue a lot by eating microwaved food without letting it cool though.

Matsi
Posts: 76
Joined: Sun Jul 06, 2008 12:22 am UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Matsi » Sat Mar 07, 2009 1:58 am UTC

I instantly thought of an anecdote when i saw the title:

When my sister was very little (so was I though, only 2 years older), she once mistook a jar of sambal (Indonesian chili paste) for strawberry jam.. after a spoonful went into her mouth, there was the loudest, longest continuous cry i have heard to this day.

User avatar
Jorpho
Posts: 6279
Joined: Wed Dec 12, 2007 5:31 am UTC
Location: Canada

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Jorpho » Sun Mar 08, 2009 3:24 am UTC


User avatar
Chfan
Posts: 2141
Joined: Sun Oct 19, 2008 10:26 pm UTC
Location: American East Coast

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Chfan » Sun Mar 08, 2009 2:49 pm UTC

Ah, that's a great little movie. Poignant, too.
Just FYI, the guy isn't avatar isn't me. But he seems pretty cool.

User avatar
kaitou
Posts: 118
Joined: Fri Oct 31, 2008 4:56 pm UTC
Location: In the dark, digital recesses of your mind.
Contact:

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby kaitou » Sun Mar 08, 2009 3:57 pm UTC

A friend of mine and her uncle once tried what they thought were cherry tomatoes. They were Scotch Bonnets. Ever see food break the sound barrier?

---
The difference between a Spanish chef and a Mexican chef is that the Mexican chef washes his hands before going to the bathroom.

User avatar
el_loco_avs
Posts: 1294
Joined: Wed Feb 06, 2008 1:14 pm UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby el_loco_avs » Mon Mar 09, 2009 10:26 am UTC

I regularly quietly enjoy people thinking that our tomato chutney is of a similar level of spicyness as sambal oelek and use a large bit of it. It's funniest when they claim they're fine but you see their heads turning read and sweat starting to drip down.


Slightly sadistic of me. :D
You go your way.
I'll go your way too.

User avatar
podbaydoor
Posts: 7548
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2007 4:16 am UTC
Location: spaceship somewhere out there

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby podbaydoor » Mon Mar 09, 2009 10:09 pm UTC

Last Saturday we were frying potstickers and *FWOOM* three-foot-high flames in an epic grease fire. My roommate grabbed the flaming pan with nothing but a dishcloth to protect his hand and gingerly got it out of the apartment with the flames blowing back in his face and everything. When he threw water on the still on-fire pan there was a really neat-looking fireball.
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

Jinx
Posts: 20
Joined: Sun Mar 18, 2007 10:56 am UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Jinx » Mon Mar 09, 2009 10:43 pm UTC

podbaydoor wrote:Last Saturday we were frying potstickers and *FWOOM* three-foot-high flames in an epic grease fire. My roommate grabbed the flaming pan with nothing but a dishcloth to protect his hand and gingerly got it out of the apartment with the flames blowing back in his face and everything. When he threw water on the still on-fire pan there was a really neat-looking fireball.

XD

Reminds me of when i was cooking in our new apartment for the first time... we had electric burners, and i was still unsure of the gauging from "low" to "high". I go to make some beef stir-fry, and go about my normal routine... turn the heat up high, let the pan get smoking-hot (literally), add oil, quickly sear beef. I get one hell of a sizzle, and am impressed with the heat level on my new range. I take out the beef, and add a little more oil... i turn to grab my veggies, and turn to see my oil had ignited.. Yeah, a nice fireball going in my wok.

My first thought, i swear to god.. "Huh... wow... my little electrical range actually gets hot enough to ignite oil in the pan.."

second thought: "oh shit, i should put that fire out!"

Carnildo
Posts: 2023
Joined: Fri Jul 18, 2008 8:43 am UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Carnildo » Tue Mar 10, 2009 4:48 am UTC

podbaydoor wrote:Last Saturday we were frying potstickers and *FWOOM* three-foot-high flames in an epic grease fire. My roommate grabbed the flaming pan

Mistake #1: you don't have the pan's lid handy to put out the fire?
with nothing but a dishcloth to protect his hand and gingerly got it out of the apartment with the flames blowing back in his face and everything.

Mistake #2: that's a recipe for igniting your hair. Hair flambe doesn't smell very good, and I don't think it tastes good, either.
When he threw water on the still on-fire pan there was a really neat-looking fireball.

Mistake #3: water + grease fire = puddle of flaming grease.

User avatar
el_loco_avs
Posts: 1294
Joined: Wed Feb 06, 2008 1:14 pm UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby el_loco_avs » Tue Mar 10, 2009 11:22 am UTC

Carnildo wrote:
When he threw water on the still on-fire pan there was a really neat-looking fireball.

Mistake #3: water + grease fire = puddle of flaming grease.



I was assuming they did that on purpose. :D
You go your way.
I'll go your way too.

User avatar
podbaydoor
Posts: 7548
Joined: Sun Sep 02, 2007 4:16 am UTC
Location: spaceship somewhere out there

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby podbaydoor » Wed Mar 11, 2009 3:56 pm UTC

I know, I know, he was extremely lucky (also he has short hair). Everyone we recounted the story to later on also sounded horrified at throwing water on flaming grease. But we had enough to drown the damn thing, so the fire went out quickly. The dumplings went to waste, though. :(
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

User avatar
Axman
Posts: 2124
Joined: Mon Sep 10, 2007 6:51 pm UTC
Location: Denver, Colorado

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Axman » Thu Mar 12, 2009 1:04 am UTC

You can prime foods for more vicious attacks:

Pure Cap

It comes in a pharmaceuticals container and serves with an eyedropper.

User avatar
Jorpho
Posts: 6279
Joined: Wed Dec 12, 2007 5:31 am UTC
Location: Canada

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Jorpho » Thu Mar 12, 2009 4:17 am UTC

Axman wrote:It comes in a pharmaceuticals container and serves with an eyedropper.
500,000 Scovilles? That's not "pure cap". Pure cap is a solid.

User avatar
el_loco_avs
Posts: 1294
Joined: Wed Feb 06, 2008 1:14 pm UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby el_loco_avs » Thu Mar 12, 2009 1:39 pm UTC

Man there are peppers gotter than 500k. Peppers I use in food are 100k-350k apparantly.



after research:

apparantly I've had 600k directly on my tongue. *shrug*
You go your way.
I'll go your way too.

User avatar
Clumpy
Posts: 1883
Joined: Thu Jul 19, 2007 4:48 am UTC
Contact:

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby Clumpy » Thu Mar 12, 2009 7:37 pm UTC

When making macaroni I used to suck a single piece directly off the stirring spoon into my mouth to test for done-ness. One day I shot a piece of molten hot macaroni right down my throat and burned my uvula. Since then I try to cool the pieces down. . .

User avatar
ssbookyu123
Posts: 124
Joined: Sun May 17, 2009 3:26 am UTC

Re: Merry Hell (AKA When Food Attacks!!!)

Postby ssbookyu123 » Thu Jun 11, 2009 8:56 pm UTC

Once I went to a diner and I ordered the sushi. First of all not the smartest idea to get sushi in a restaurant that is really dirty and second of all definitly do not eat it when it smells funny or when there is a slight greenish tint. Well lets just say that I am not the smartest person when it comes to trusting restaurants. 1 week of really bad food poisoning is not fun at all!


Return to “Food”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 4 guests