0305: "Rule 34"

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Malsies
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Postby Malsies » Wed Aug 22, 2007 7:12 am UTC

semicolon wrote:
Malsies wrote:The sad thing is, there are people who are actually turned on by all the bizarre porn out there. Not that I'm against all bizarre porn...but sometimes it's just taken too far. Sneeze fetishists? No thank you.

You don't appreciate the parallels between a sneeze and an orgasm?


No, not really. I can't recall anything from a sneeze that feels remotely like an orgasm. I would probably be rather embarrassed if I sneezed during sex.
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Postby noonie » Wed Aug 22, 2007 9:31 pm UTC

mjec wrote:
noonie wrote:
Shale wrote:I'm particularly amused by the fact that it's the chick who decides to go ahead and make the porn.


women are major producers in the porn industry.


You'd know this if you've spent any time in the slash-fic areas of LJ. On that note, NC17 xkcd fic would be hot. I can see it now. But please leave nerd girl out of it. She's perfect just as she is.

Obviously she's a slashfic author, probably HP and Buffy, dabbling in a bit of Stewart/Colbert for variety...


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Postby arachnophilia » Thu Aug 23, 2007 2:18 am UTC

i, for one, refuse to believe that something this simple could possibly violate rule 34. there must be electric-guitar-in-the-shower porno somewhere. i am determined to find it.

however, i find it interesting that waterproof acoustic guitars exist.

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aaaaah no.

Postby vampyre459 » Thu Aug 23, 2007 2:31 am UTC

Herman wrote:
Delbin wrote:Belgium?


Ooh, that would be great. Ford and Trillian performing Belgium on each other. And then Marvin comes in... and, well, the next day he has a pain in the diodes on his left side.

Aaand that now exists.


i REALLY didn't want to think about that. :shock:

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Postby jhlipton » Thu Aug 23, 2007 3:44 am UTC

arachnophilia wrote:i, for one, refuse to believe that something this simple could possibly violate rule 34. there must be electric-guitar-in-the-shower porno somewhere. i am determined to find it.

however, i find it interesting that waterproof acoustic guitars exist.


I found a vid that Jenna Jameson did for Guitar World, but no shower. I find it odd that there's NOTHING out there!
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arachnophilia
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Postby arachnophilia » Thu Aug 23, 2007 7:50 am UTC

jhlipton wrote:
arachnophilia wrote:i, for one, refuse to believe that something this simple could possibly violate rule 34. there must be electric-guitar-in-the-shower porno somewhere. i am determined to find it.

however, i find it interesting that waterproof acoustic guitars exist.


I found a vid that Jenna Jameson did for Guitar World, but no shower. I find it odd that there's NOTHING out there!


indeed. showers and guitars are individually staples of the porn world. you'd think someone would have come up with this idea before.

*sigh* if only my more adventurous friends hadn't moved away.

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Postby Quantumsingularity_89 » Thu Aug 23, 2007 12:52 pm UTC

Delbin wrote:Belgium?

These little things are what makes me happy.

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Postby noonie » Thu Aug 23, 2007 1:16 pm UTC

Quantumsingularity_89 wrote:
Delbin wrote:Belgium?

These little things are what makes me happy.


jean claude van damme porn?

now i'm sick...
anything i'd like to be remembered for saying can't be said to everyone.

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Postby Sprocket » Thu Aug 23, 2007 4:51 pm UTC

Seriously, you'd need to have a dead guitar or fake the picture. I might do it, but the guitar would need to cover everything.
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arachnophilia
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Postby arachnophilia » Thu Aug 23, 2007 5:13 pm UTC

CatProximity wrote:Seriously, you'd need to have a dead guitar or fake the picture. I might do it, but the guitar would need to cover everything.


well, for god's sake, don't plug it in!

though your guitar will probably be dead afterwards.

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Postby Sprocket » Thu Aug 23, 2007 7:45 pm UTC

arachnophilia wrote:
CatProximity wrote:Seriously, you'd need to have a dead guitar or fake the picture. I might do it, but the guitar would need to cover everything.


well, for god's sake, don't plug it in!

though your guitar will probably be dead afterwards.
That would be the problem. Naturally you wouldn't plug it in. That would be uncivilized.
"She’s a free spirit, a wind-rider, she’s at one with nature, and walks with the kodama eidolons”
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Postby Tawnos » Thu Aug 23, 2007 9:19 pm UTC

I think everybody needs inspiration. Now, whether my white ass inspires you to actually take better pics yourself, or just to vomit, I don't care, but I want to see wetriffs go live (with better looking people).

Those in #xkcd have already suffered this, now it's time for those in the fora ;).

http://www.tawnos.com/images/xkcd

Probably NSFW, nor safe for lunch, nor safe for your retinas.

Enjoy
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alexthesoso
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for those saying dont plug it in

Postby alexthesoso » Thu Aug 23, 2007 9:25 pm UTC

theres no juice running through the guitar. when you plug it in, the pickups send a small electrical signal thats actually created by the strings moving over to an amp that then gets that signal and amps it (hence the name)

the water would potentially damage the wood over time, so youd want to dry it out completely, but you can get a guitar sopping wet, no sweat ive a friend whos played his underwater to see what it sounds like amped. its basically a more natural sounding palm mute, as teh water slows down the strings faster.

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Postby 4=5 » Thu Aug 23, 2007 9:49 pm UTC

political porn

"The Well-Oiled Machine"

starring: The Govenator

plot summary

Arnold, after a hard days work, is relaxing and exploreing the Bush, when suddenly a plolitical issue comes "up"!!

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Postby arachnophilia » Fri Aug 24, 2007 6:58 am UTC

CatProximity wrote: That would be the problem. Naturally you wouldn't plug it in. That would be uncivilized.


well, then you'd have electric-guitar-in-the-shower-snuff-porno. which, come to think of it, probably also exists.

...or not:

alexthesoso wrote:theres no juice running through the guitar. when you plug it in, the pickups send a small electrical signal thats actually created by the strings moving over to an amp that then gets that signal and amps it (hence the name)

the water would potentially damage the wood over time, so youd want to dry it out completely, but you can get a guitar sopping wet, no sweat ive a friend whos played his underwater to see what it sounds like amped. its basically a more natural sounding palm mute, as teh water slows down the strings faster.


that's a good point.

Tawnos wrote:www.tawnos.com/images/xkcd


ok, you win. terribly anticlimactically, too.

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Postby alexthesoso » Fri Aug 24, 2007 7:37 pm UTC

4=5 wrote:political porn

"The Well-Oiled Machine"

starring: The Govenator

plot summary

Arnold, after a hard days work, is relaxing and exploreing the Bush, when suddenly a plolitical issue comes "up"!!



you will pay for that as soon as the pain stops in my head. :evil:

that said, there is governator porn out there, he did a couple pornos in his steroid days

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Postby Foone » Sat Aug 25, 2007 3:57 am UTC

Lester :P wrote:What are the other rules?


34 is the only one anyone can agree on. Many people have made lists though (Warning: Link should be SFW, site isn't)

And to lazily reply to some claims about rule 34 being from ED or any of the *chans, nope. It's from a webcomic that used to be at zoom-out.co.uk (Been down for a while now)
Macrochan also has the original picture, which is again SFW though the site may not be.

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Postby frodo34x » Sat Aug 25, 2007 9:56 pm UTC

Foone wrote:
Lester :P wrote:What are the other rules?


34 is the only one anyone can agree on. Many people have made lists though (Warning: Link should be SFW, site isn't)

And to lazily reply to some claims about rule 34 being from ED or any of the *chans, nope. It's from a webcomic that used to be at zoom-out.co.uk (Been down for a while now)
Macrochan also has the original picture, which is again SFW though the site may not be.

Most agree on Rule 35 (or rule 34a). That is, if a porn of it doesn't exist, one of the *chans will make it.

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Postby adriano » Mon Aug 27, 2007 5:50 pm UTC

Hello all, I'm surprised the strip nº 715 from questionablecontent ("powers of observation" be its title) hasn't been mentioned yet. I don't think I'm the only fan of both xkcd and QC.

Edit: just saw the rule about no linking while being an absolute newbie.

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Postby Sprocket » Mon Aug 27, 2007 6:07 pm UTC

27b/6 wrote:XKCD Forum Porn?
Y'all have BEEN to the girly thread, no?

and if this isn't XKCD porn, I don't know WHAT You kids want
Image

SO SEXY!
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Postby podbaydoor » Sun Sep 02, 2007 7:57 am UTC

I didn't immediately think Rule 34 when I came across this LJ comm because I'm not nerdy enough. But it certainly fits. (In fact, I joined xkcd and racked up 10+ posts just to be able to post this link.)

http://community.livejournal.com/anthropomor_fic
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Postby sxiz » Sun Sep 02, 2007 6:50 pm UTC

I actually wrote a little spelling-bee themed smut drabble after reading this. I was advised to continue. I'm not sure if I can. But the point is, it's on the internet and it is NC-17. Someone do the sex atop storm-chasing vans because I so want to read that.
skine wrote:
diotimajsh wrote:Oh, Don Quixote, of course. Now I feel like an idiot for not getting it.


It's okay, the comic was a bit quixotic.

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Postby LassLisa » Sun Sep 02, 2007 7:29 pm UTC

adriano wrote:Hello all, I'm surprised the strip nº 715 from questionablecontent ("powers of observation" be its title) hasn't been mentioned yet. I don't think I'm the only fan of both xkcd and QC.


Yeah, I for one think of the term "quantum fetish mechanics" well before "rule 34".

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Postby shadebug » Mon Sep 03, 2007 5:33 pm UTC

I'm in tivoli gardens and there's a fridge magnet with a naked guy in a shower with an epiphone LP
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Postby Typhus » Tue Sep 04, 2007 10:51 pm UTC


Piarew
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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby Piarew » Wed Oct 03, 2007 8:35 am UTC

Sadly it seems that project wetriffs is inactive, or people are not submitting nearly enough pics, or randall is being creepy like in that "One Hour Photo" movie.

Update???????

:P
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Re:

Postby TV4Fun » Thu Oct 04, 2007 11:53 pm UTC

3li wrote:some girls have really cute sneezes! Nothing to get turned on by, but if it's cute enough, it's worth asking them out for a date.
Seconded
$_[0] wrote:rule 2:
Once a relationship ends, physical access to all relevant machinery is denied.

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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby Southwest » Sat Oct 06, 2007 1:24 am UTC

Piarew wrote:or randall is being creepy like in that "One Hour Photo" movie.


Ha. I loved that movie.

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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby GBog » Wed Oct 10, 2007 9:55 pm UTC

Just thought I'd drop the note:

It's up.

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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby ARVash » Thu Oct 11, 2007 2:34 am UTC

What are the other rules?
Hey!

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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby Gadren » Thu Oct 11, 2007 2:46 am UTC

From Encyclopedia Dramatica:
These are the rules of the internet

A note to all fags reading this these aren't the original rules, the original rules were much better in every way. And while these rules hold mostly true, for they have arisen from the 3 rules (1,34, and 35) that were not forgotten, they do not have the same awesomeness of the original 36 rules. Finding in archives the html containing the original 36 is equivalent better than finding the Holy Grail.

1. Do not talk about /b/
2. DO NOT talk about /b/
3. We are Anonymous
4. Anonymous is legion
5. Anonymous never forgives
6. Anonymous can be horrible, senseless, uncaring monster
7. Anonymous is still able to deliver
8. There are no real rules about posting
9. There are no real rules about moderation either - enjoy your ban
10. If you enjoy any rival sites - DON'T
11. All your carefully picked arguments can easily be ignored
12. Anything you say can and will be used aganist you
13. Anything you say can and will be turned into something else - fixed
14. Do not argue with trolls - it means that they win
15. The harder you try the harder you will fail
16. If you fail in epic proportions, it may just become a winning failure
17. Every win fails eventually
18. Everything that can be labeled can be hated
19. The more you hate it the stronger it gets
20. Nothing is to be taken seriously
21. Original content is original only for a few seconds before getting old
22. Copypasta is made to ruin every last bit of originality
23. Copypasta is made to ruin every last bit of originality
24. Every repost is always a repost of a repost
25. Relation to the original topic decreases with every single post
26. Any topic can be easily turned into something totally unrelated
27. Always question a person's sexual preferences without any real reason
28. Always question a person's gender - just in case it's really a man
29. In the internet all girls are men and all kids are undercover FBI agents
30. There are no girls on the internet
31. TITS or GTFO - the choice is yours
32. You must have pictrues to prove your statement
33. Lurk more - it's never enough
34. There is porn of it, no exceptions
35. If no porn is found at the moment, it will be made
36. There will always be more fucked up shit than you just saw
37. You can not divide by zero (just because the calculator says so)
38. No real limits of any kind apply here - not even the sky
39. CAPSLOCK IS CRUISE CONTROL FOR COOL
40. EVEN WITH CRUISE CONTROL YOU STILL HAVE TO STEER
41. Desu isn't funny. Seriously guys. It's worse than Bruce Schneier jokes
42. Nothing is Sacred.
43. The more beautiful and pure a thing is - the more satisfying it is to corrupt it
44. Even one positive comment about Japanese things can make you a weeaboo
45. When one sees a lion, one must get into the car
46. There is always furry porn of it
47. The pool is always closed
48. Do Not turn your back on Anonymous. Do not Betray Anonymous. Anonymous does not forget and neither should you. What Anonymous gives, Anonymous can take away. We control everything.

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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby nyeguy » Thu Oct 11, 2007 4:09 am UTC

ARVash wrote:What are the other rules?

Though already posted, the other rules don't matter. Except for 1 and 2 - they protect the innocent.
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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby sxiz » Mon Oct 15, 2007 9:04 pm UTC

Last edited by sxiz on Thu Oct 18, 2007 9:52 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
skine wrote:
diotimajsh wrote:Oh, Don Quixote, of course. Now I feel like an idiot for not getting it.


It's okay, the comic was a bit quixotic.

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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby russianspy1234 » Wed Oct 17, 2007 4:27 pm UTC

nvm. someone already posted, should have read through the whole thread before replying. >.<

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Postby Platypodes » Mon Nov 19, 2007 8:50 am UTC

My faith in Rule 34 has been shattered.

I was stunned to discover that, unless my google skills have failed me, nobody has photoshopped any naked pictures of Bill Gates.

Surely this would be an obvious thing to find online. Just obvious.

And the really disturbing thing about this is the fact that in just a few short years, I've gone from being surprised by the weird porn on the web to being surprised only by the weird porn that isn't there. And that it took me at least an hour to realize that there might possibly be anything funny about my being shocked to not see naked Bill Gates pics.

O webosphere, what hast thou done to me???

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Re:

Postby zingmaster » Mon Nov 19, 2007 4:30 pm UTC

Platypodes wrote:My faith in Rule 34 has been shattered.

I was stunned to discover that, unless my google skills have failed me, nobody has photoshopped any naked pictures of Bill Gates.

Surely this would be an obvious thing to find online. Just obvious.

And the really disturbing thing about this is the fact that in just a few short years, I've gone from being surprised by the weird porn on the web to being surprised only by the weird porn that isn't there. And that it took me at least an hour to realize that there might possibly be anything funny about my being shocked to not see naked Bill Gates pics.

O webosphere, what hast thou done to me???

Little do you know that those who have tried to photoshop Bill Gates naked died immediately from hemorrhaging as a result of the disturbing nature of such pics. Such a outcome was never foreseen, but instead painfully realized after the fifteenth funeral in a week.
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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby Vanguard » Mon Nov 19, 2007 4:40 pm UTC

But what about people who walked in the room to see said pictures after finding their fellow man dead? Surely they'd either; Die instantly as well or: Profit.
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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby TV4Fun » Tue Nov 20, 2007 12:13 am UTC

There is very little porn involving geek girls. I mean real geek girls not just girls pretending to be geeks. We need to fix this.
$_[0] wrote:rule 2:
Once a relationship ends, physical access to all relevant machinery is denied.

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Re: "Rule 34" Discussion

Postby Platypodes » Tue Nov 20, 2007 12:42 am UTC

zingmaster wrote:Little do you know that those who have tried to photoshop Bill Gates naked died immediately from hemorrhaging as a result of the disturbing nature of such pics. Such a outcome was never foreseen, but instead painfully realized after the fifteenth funeral in a week.

*snicker*

Vanguard wrote:But what about people who walked in the room to see said pictures after finding their fellow man dead? Surely they'd either; Die instantly as well or: Profit.

I would assume they died too... unless they were forewarned and took appropriate precautions. Would viewing through protective eyewear help?

TV4Fun wrote:There is very little porn involving geek girls. I mean real geek girls not just girls pretending to be geeks. We need to fix this.

There is, however, about 500 times as much involving geek girls as there is involving geek boys. We need to fix this even more. :x
videogamesizzle wrote:so, uh, seen any good arbitrary, high numbers lately?


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