1256: "Questions"

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1256: "Questions"

Postby rhomboidal » Mon Aug 26, 2013 5:31 am UTC

Image

Title Text: To whoever typed 'why is arwen dying': GOOD. FUCKING. QUESTION.

So I'm super inquisitive. Sue me.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby sellyme » Mon Aug 26, 2013 5:42 am UTC

I was at least partially responsible for "Why is YKK on all zippers"!
Sellyme is a je- Wait no.

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Quicksilver
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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Quicksilver » Mon Aug 26, 2013 5:44 am UTC

I lol'd so hard at "why is psychic weak to bug." Having played Pokemon Blue, my observation was for the most part they weren't. Most bug types were also poison types and the only bug move super effective against psychic was "pin needle."

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby CocoaNutCakery » Mon Aug 26, 2013 5:49 am UTC

And people wonder why I use Bing...

Quicksilver wrote:I lol'd so hard at "why is psychic weak to bug." Having played Pokemon Blue, my observation was for the most part they weren't. Most bug types were also poison types and the only bug move super effective against psychic was "pin needle."


Three common fears that are also Pokemon types: Ghost, Bug, and Dark.

Also, Pokemon Blue isn't a good example. Psychic was way too OP in there and a large part of that was the ghost and bug typing and complete lack of moves.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Quicksilver » Mon Aug 26, 2013 5:52 am UTC

CocoaNutCakery wrote:And people wonder why I use Bing...

Quicksilver wrote:I lol'd so hard at "why is psychic weak to bug." Having played Pokemon Blue, my observation was for the most part they weren't. Most bug types were also poison types and the only bug move super effective against psychic was "pin needle."


Three common fears that are also Pokemon types: Ghost, Bug, and Dark.

Also, Pokemon Blue isn't a good example. Psychic was way too OP in there and a large part of that was the ghost and bug typing and complete lack of moves.
I admit I never liked the idea of Ghost types being Poison too; my Gengar ended up only infuriating water trainers with Thunder.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby dervalanana » Mon Aug 26, 2013 5:59 am UTC

As to why Arwen is dying;

Arwen is one of Elrond Half-Elven's kids. Since she is, she gets the choice as to whether she shares the fate of men, or the fate of elves. If she leaves for the undying lands, she shares the fate of elves and lives "forever". If she choses to stay in the mortal lands, then she will age and share the fate of men.

The only reason this became an issue is that Galadriel decided to head back to the west, which was kinda a trigger for the overall decline of the elves. The Valar (gods of LotR) basically said "look, she's the last true High Elf, and she's coming back. You either need to come back with her, or be a human". Elrond already made his decision millenia ago, so he was unaffected. The same with his two sons (albeit far more recently). Only Arwen was undecided at this point, due to her love of humans in general, and Aragorn specifically


Don't ask why wood elves didn't need to head to the west... I don't feel like going too much more into the silmarillion right now

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby bouer » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:04 am UTC

Try seeing how many of them you can answer. A surprising number are actually valid questions.

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Postby Eternal Density » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:12 am UTC

Why do people say "there are no stupid questions"?

The answer to "Why do good people die?" is that there aren't any good people.
Last edited by Eternal Density on Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:18 am UTC, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby RAGBRAIvet » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:15 am UTC

Oh, great!! Now I've got to Google each and every one of these to see just what kind of answers were given!!!

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby RAGBRAIvet » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:16 am UTC

Eternal Density wrote:Why do people say "there are no stupid questions"?

Because there are no stupid questions, just stupid answers.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Harry Voyager » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:21 am UTC

'why is arwen dying'

That one I actually did eventually figure out. See, sure Aragorn is dead, but their son is still around, so why doesn't he go haul mom back when she heads back to the ruins of Rivendell to mourn until she keals over? Well, he does. Then he dies, and the grandkids periodically go retrieve grandma from her mourning stupor, then its the great-grandkids, then the great great-grand kids, then the great-great-grandkids etc etc etc etc, until eventually, one of them doesn't when she goes off to mourn every generation of her descendents she's ever known dieing in front of her.

Basically, Arwen has a few great years. Then she gets to watch everyone she's known and loved die horribly in rapid succession, pretty much for the rest of eternity.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby hyperion2010 » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:26 am UTC

I searched in vain for 'do birds suddenly appear.'

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Tass » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:34 am UTC

Harry Voyager wrote:'why is arwen dying'

That one I actually did eventually figure out. See, sure Aragorn is dead, but their son is still around, so why doesn't he go haul mom back when she heads back to the ruins of Rivendell to mourn until she keals over? Well, he does. Then he dies, and the grandkids periodically go retrieve grandma from her mourning stupor, then its the great-grandkids, then the great great-grand kids, then the great-great-grandkids etc etc etc etc, until eventually, one of them doesn't when she goes off to mourn every generation of her descendents she's ever known dieing in front of her.

Basically, Arwen has a few great years. Then she gets to watch everyone she's known and loved die horribly in rapid succession, pretty much for the rest of eternity.


Actually, she was a half-elf (well part-elf), like her farther and uncle, Elrond and Elros. Like them she got to choose whether to be counted as a human or an elf (Elrond chose elf, Elros chose human and was the first of the dunedain). Because of Aragorn she chose the mortal life so that she could be with him and then follow him out of the world when their time came.

(...and it was 120 great years, not "a few", and it was Lórien, not Rivendell, she went to mourn in until she died.)

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby da Doctah » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:43 am UTC

Why did anyone think a fourth season of Chico and the Man was a good idea?

Why was Adam Ant on the Motown 25th Anniversary TV special?

Why was there a sequel to Highlander?

Why was Joe Friday a sergeant again when Dragnet came back in color, after being promoted to lieutenant before the black and white series ended?

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Arky » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:52 am UTC

"Why is there kicking in my stomach" might just be the best one.

It's not quite "how is babby formed?" but it's close.

I am stunned, stunned, that there is no raptor question that I noticed.
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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby duefiori » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:55 am UTC

This is going to become a poster, right? RIGHT?

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby BlitzGirl » Mon Aug 26, 2013 6:58 am UTC

Only if a poster of Time gets made first! All 3,099 newpix of it! Image

(Or at least a t-shirt.)
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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby RAGBRAIvet » Mon Aug 26, 2013 7:03 am UTC

BlitzGirl wrote:Only if a poster of Time gets made first! All 3,099 newpix of it! Image

(Or at least a t-shirt.)

Randall is going to do Time as a flipbook (hint, hint).

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby TheNgaiGuy » Mon Aug 26, 2013 7:09 am UTC

Why aren't pokemon real?!? That's going to keep me up at night.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Diadem » Mon Aug 26, 2013 7:14 am UTC

XKCD wrote:Why are there male and female bikes

Loved this question.

The answer is that women used to wear long skirts. The upper bar on the frame of a bicycle gets in the way while riding a bike wearing a long skirt. Also, getting up onto a bike the male way (swinging your leg over the rear end) is problematic in a long skirt. So they did away with the upper bar, fixing both problems. So why aren't all bikes like that? Well, strength. The frame of a female bike is just weaker, and a female bike is less stable as a result.

Things are changing though. Most women no longer wear skirts. And men are starting to see the big advantages of female bikes, when doing groceries for example, or while bringing kids to school. More and more the traditionally female model of bikes is used as a city bike for both genders, while the traditional male model is used as a sport bike for both genders. Which makes a lot of sense.

</random knowledge>
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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby deskjethp » Mon Aug 26, 2013 7:33 am UTC

Why isn't there GPS in laptops?
Why is there caffeine in shampoo?

Why are helicopters circling my house?

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby grahamburger » Mon Aug 26, 2013 9:11 am UTC

Interestingly, on google.fr, first auto-completion for "pourquoi" (why) is "pourquoi pas" (why not). The universal (and useless) answer.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby burnum » Mon Aug 26, 2013 9:19 am UTC

Why didn't Black Hat Guy ask a question?

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby The Moomin » Mon Aug 26, 2013 9:25 am UTC

If there weren't male and female bikes, where would we get baby bikes from?
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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby AdmiralJustin » Mon Aug 26, 2013 9:29 am UTC

Why is Wolverine not in the Avengers?

Because there's one villan not even the Avengers can defeat.

Licensing.

It's like plot armor but made of greed and the blood of lower executives. Quite sparkly, actually.
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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby slicedtoad » Mon Aug 26, 2013 9:41 am UTC

It's be awesome if each question had it's own hover text with the answer to the query. Anyone have too much time on their hands?

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Wooloomooloo » Mon Aug 26, 2013 10:16 am UTC

RAGBRAIvet wrote:
Eternal Density wrote:Why do people say "there are no stupid questions"?

Because there are no stupid questions, just stupid answers.

Au contraire, there are in fact astonishingly many stupid questions. Starting with the simplest of them all, the auto-"why", fired back from the hip immediately after each increasingly awkward attempt to answer the previous one. It's not actually a question at all, but a command: "just keep talking and don't mind I'm not actually bothering to pay attention / try to actually understand any of it - I just enjoy watching you squirm". To use an analogy, the rest of them are mostly similar in nature to those scientific "theories" that get famously labeled "not even wrong", except in question form. There's a reason the phrase "that's an intelligent/good question" even exist - exactly because moronic ones exist too. Sadly, by Sturgeon's law, those are making up the bulk of it...

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby DR6 » Mon Aug 26, 2013 10:39 am UTC

]Guys, you missed the most important one:

Why aren't there dinosaur ghosts?


This one will keep me up at night.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Thibaw » Mon Aug 26, 2013 11:12 am UTC

This movie related one is missing:
Why no tanks in starship troopers?

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby teelo » Mon Aug 26, 2013 11:58 am UTC

In before some extremely bored individual takes the time to compile a list of answers to all those questions.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby teelo » Mon Aug 26, 2013 12:01 pm UTC

lol at "Why are there female Mr Mimes". Gooood question!

Pokemon questions ftw?

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby waidh » Mon Aug 26, 2013 12:02 pm UTC

Wooloomooloo wrote:
RAGBRAIvet wrote:
Eternal Density wrote:Why do people say "there are no stupid questions"?

Because there are no stupid questions, just stupid answers.

Au contraire, there are in fact astonishingly many stupid questions. Starting with the simplest of them all, the auto-"why", fired back from the hip immediately after each increasingly awkward attempt to answer the previous one. It's not actually a question at all, but a command: "just keep talking and don't mind I'm not actually bothering to pay attention / try to actually understand any of it - I just enjoy watching you squirm". To use an analogy, the rest of them are mostly similar in nature to those scientific "theories" that get famously labeled "not even wrong", except in question form. There's a reason the phrase "that's an intelligent/good question" even exist - exactly because moronic ones exist too. Sadly, by Sturgeon's law, those are making up the bulk of it...


I interpret it another way: "There are no stupid questions" is a way to say "Don't be a jerk to people asking about things you consider common knowledge or common sense."
Sometimes, questions can also be misunderstood. Eagerly labeling it 'stupid question' and ridiculing the questioner takes you beyond 'jerk', in my opinion.

Your example, I wouldn't call a 'stupid question', instead I'd call it 'dishonest' because the questioner has no intent to find new knowledge/understanding. Of course, it can be difficult to learn the questioners intent.

As for "good question." Does it have to exist with a polar opposite? Could it not simply be to differentiate between commonplace questions, e.g. 8th grade students asking the same questions in chemistry lessons every year, and rare/unexpected questions that push the boundaries of current (or teacher's) knowledge/understanding?

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Whizbang » Mon Aug 26, 2013 12:39 pm UTC

Thibaw wrote:This movie related one is missing:
Why no tanks in starship troopers?


Ah, but there are... sort of. At least in the books, there are. In the books, each man is inside a giant suit of high-tech armor, loaded with all sorts of nifty weapons. Think Iron Man, but with nukes. These men in high tech armor are shot out of giant cannons, to land on alien planets and generally destroy everything in sight.

If you ever played StarCraft, the Terrans are based off Starship Troopers.

... I need to read that book again. Good times.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Thibaw » Mon Aug 26, 2013 12:53 pm UTC

Whizbang wrote:
Thibaw wrote:This movie related one is missing:
Why no tanks in starship troopers?


Ah, but there are... sort of. At least in the books, there are. In the books, each man is inside a giant suit of high-tech armor, loaded with all sorts of nifty weapons. Think Iron Man, but with nukes. These men in high tech armor are shot out of giant cannons, to land on alien planets and generally destroy everything in sight.

If you ever played StarCraft, the Terrans are based off Starship Troopers.

... I need to read that book again. Good times.


And I always thought, the Zerg are from Starship Troopers and the Terrans are from Warhammer 40k. I guess I have to read that book. "Stranger in a Strange Land" is the only one from Heinlein in my shelf.

Code: Select all

Why is "starship troopers" not in my bookshelf?

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby FrobozzWizard » Mon Aug 26, 2013 1:10 pm UTC

My first thought, when seeing this, was a bit of Frank Zappa's craziness:

Where can I go to get my poodle clipped in Burbank?
Where can I go to get organic vaseline for my ????
Where can I go to get my jeans embroided at Fullurton?.....
Where can I go to get my zipper repaired in Hollywood?
Where can I go to get my speakers fixed?
Where can I go to get my exit lights?,
Where can I go to get my stomach pumped?
Where can I go to collapse

Questions, Questions, Questions, flooding into the mind of the concerned young person today. Ah, but it's a great time to be alive ladies and gentlemen.

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Jorpho
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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Jorpho » Mon Aug 26, 2013 1:18 pm UTC

I like how the comic neatly captures a certain existential despair. There are only questions, questions shouted every which way, always questions, and never answers.

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby kurukkan » Mon Aug 26, 2013 1:20 pm UTC

Why are there so many




SONGS ABOUT RAINBOWS

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby shinksma » Mon Aug 26, 2013 1:22 pm UTC

RAGBRAIvet wrote:
Eternal Density wrote:Why do people say "there are no stupid questions"?

Because there are no stupid questions, just stupid answers.

Mr. Garrison, South Park:

There are no stupid questions, just stupid people.


shinksma

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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Whizbang » Mon Aug 26, 2013 1:26 pm UTC

Jorpho wrote:I like how the comic neatly captures a certain existential despair. There are only questions, questions shouted every which way, always questions, and never answers.


What do you see when you look at this:
rorschach-test.jpg

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Adam H
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Re: 1256: "Questions"

Postby Adam H » Mon Aug 26, 2013 1:29 pm UTC

A surprising number (all???) of these can be answered with the tongue in cheek response: "Because God hates you."
-Adam


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