EdgarJPublius wrote:massive amount of effort would still be worth it for a reward of bacon,
Not for me. I just don't like bacon all that much. Sorry.
Now, fresh sausages... that might be motivation. But that still requires at least basic skills, and I'm missing the culinary gene, or something like that.
1. Turn on stove
See, like, right there, you lost me.
Seriously. I turned the power off to my stove over a year ago, when I spilled some water on it and didn't want a 220 volt, 80 amp short-circuit. I haven't turned it back on since.
2. Put pan on stove
I don't own any pans. Well, that don't go in the microwave.
3. Put bacon in pan
I could probably manage that, but don't you have to put butter in the pan, or turn the bacon over or move it around or something?
And you have to clean the pan after (or before, depending on POV, and how long you can put up with a dirty pan sitting in the sink). From what I've seen, cleaning a bacon pan is rather more than an automatic dishwasher can handle. Certainly more than mine can handle, which has trouble rinsing the soap off.