0562: "Parking"

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Kailen
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Kailen » Mon Mar 30, 2009 8:18 pm UTC

If you have problems with the way specific people are acting, that includes how they are parking their vehicles, then your issue is with the people, and not the vehicles. The problem is, many people blame the vehicle. This gets compounded by greenik asshats who don't realize that sometimes, large vehicles *ARE* necessary. These people begin to blame the vehicles, and start looking for other, similiar, vehicles to blame, even if those drivers DON'T do anything wrong. Also, large vehicles should be accommodated for. If your business builds a parking lot, and decides to make all of the spaces fit for compact cars, don't be surprised when someone parks a large vehicle in two spaces. That's the business' mistake, not the owner of the vehicle, and certainly NOT the vehicle itself.

In other words: Get over yourselves, greentards. Big vehicles are not a problem. YOUR stereotyping of large vehicles and their owners is a bigger problem than the people who decide to buy large vehicles, for whatever reason. Your blind intolerance offends me.
* These senseless ramblings brought to you by Insanity™. If you just can't figure the dang thing out, it must be Insanity™.

BHM
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby BHM » Mon Mar 30, 2009 8:20 pm UTC

NO ONE ON THIS ENTIRE FORUM IS TALKING ABOUT BEING GREEN.
No one.

Just you.

Thought I'd like to point that out.

It has nothing to do with being green.
It has to do with your twelve year old ideology of "I'll do what I want without thinking about others because I want to and that's how I roll."

Just so you know.

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Iridos
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Iridos » Mon Mar 30, 2009 8:22 pm UTC

Kailen wrote:You still don't get it. It's not up to you to determine the "necessity" of other people's vehicles.


Sure something that will have to be re-thought in view of global warming and other related issues.
(Of course some forever-blind will now shout that that's a myth, but that's humanity for you)

Personal freedom only goes so far, until it affects the life of others... and for some things we were just not aware how much they will affect others?

I also might want to add that very very few things are actually _necessary_ for humans to live, if you get right down to it (:
BHM wrote:NO ONE ON THIS ENTIRE FORUM IS TALKING ABOUT BEING GREEN.

Haha... I was - only constant posts keep me from submitting :-P


I.

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poirelli
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby poirelli » Mon Mar 30, 2009 8:45 pm UTC

crzftx wrote:... The enjoyment I get from owning the vehicle must be greater than the strain I put on people by forcing everyone to walk one (or 1/6, if there's six rows) extra parking width every time I park. Since it probably isn't (people get pretty upset about these things), I need to park near the back to justify my contribution. ...


To be fair, an overwhelming majority of US citizens could probably use a little more exercise in their daily lives. Maybe we should applaud the people who are encouraging us to walk a little further, burn a few extra calories and strengthen our hearts. It's these double-parkers that are ultimately contributing in a small way to the longevity of each and every one of us!!


Note: if you don't live in the US, ignore this post. I can't knowingly comment on your society's health.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby 1 1 2 3 5 8 13 21 » Mon Mar 30, 2009 8:46 pm UTC

DSDM wrote:Situations like this are why they need to enact a "The Asshole Had It Coming" law, where acts of revenge against obvious acts of complete asshattery would be decriminalized. Obviously the revenge would have to be reasonable. It wouldn't apply if you blew the parker's knees off with a shotgun. Punching him in the face or keying his car would be reduced to a minor infraction. Retributions of an ironic or poetically appropriate nature, as depicted in this comic, would get you off scot-free. We would also accept slashing the tires or otherwise preventing the mobility of the vehicle, so that the driver would be forced to stay parked there.

I believe such a law would result in a more polite and considerate society. Either that or we'd all kill each other off. Either way, fewer douchbags.

I like how you think.

Quick question: Under said law, would coffee can of Thermite lit on their hood be considered "poetically appropriate"? If so, I not only would cosponsor your bill, but I'd nominate you for President of Earth.

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Kailen
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Kailen » Mon Mar 30, 2009 8:47 pm UTC

Actually, if you go back to page one, you'll see that philsov (jokingly) did talk green. So piss off.

Second, it's amazing how you people preach about not "interfering with others", yet proceed to do EXACTLY THAT, under the guise of "Well, they're infringing on others, so...." *sighs and shakes his head.*
* These senseless ramblings brought to you by Insanity™. If you just can't figure the dang thing out, it must be Insanity™.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby crzftx » Mon Mar 30, 2009 8:56 pm UTC

Kailen wrote:Actually, if you go back to page one, you'll see that philsov (jokingly) did talk green. So piss off.

Second, it's amazing how you people preach about not "interfering with others", yet proceed to do EXACTLY THAT, under the guise of "Well, they're infringing on others, so...." *sighs and shakes his head.*


Shake your head all you like. If you're talking about people lobbying to key cars poorly parked, that is a form of punishment. Ask any parent, punishment is for the greater good. It is designed to teach you there are consequences for your actions which promote negatives (such as forcing people to walk). Now some of these people are asking for punishments far too great for the crime, but that is simply all in good fun.

It's not "don't interfere with others" at all. We proceed to interfere with others, but no one (from my interpretations) has preached not to. We are simply saying what you're doing better not be something that ends up doing more harm than good.

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Kailen
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Kailen » Mon Mar 30, 2009 8:59 pm UTC

I was referring to the blind hatred of large cars. If you want to key someone's car becuase they are parked in a way you don't like, be prepared for them to react to YOUR action as well, either with the law, or their fists.
* These senseless ramblings brought to you by Insanity™. If you just can't figure the dang thing out, it must be Insanity™.

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Shadic
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Shadic » Mon Mar 30, 2009 9:01 pm UTC

This comic reminds me of You Park Like An Asshole.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Aikee » Mon Mar 30, 2009 9:06 pm UTC

hahaha
this reminds me of the time my mom got irritated at a van parked like this....and then we saw the driver get in the car-he was in an electric wheelchair, and needed to operate a lift in order to get in. it made me laugh at my mom.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby listrophy » Mon Mar 30, 2009 9:28 pm UTC

joee wrote:Alt: Police reported three dozen cheerful bystanders, yet no one claims to have seen who did it.


I'm surprised no one mentioned this: the evidence may be circumstantial but probable enough for a warrant to search the car to the sliced car's right for torch-cutting equipment. Examining solely the last panel leads to the appropriate suspicion.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Invertin » Mon Mar 30, 2009 9:36 pm UTC

In response to the arguement about big cars...
I'm glad you guys are debating about something, but so far it just seems like insults back and forwards.

That, and you are no longer talking about the comic. So I reccomend you start another topic and continue from there.

As for the comic itself- I am printing 50 copies of that third frame and keeping them with me everywhere I drive. When I run out, I move up to the fourth, then I'll probably carve the entire comic into the offending car itself.

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MadKingSoupII
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby MadKingSoupII » Mon Mar 30, 2009 9:40 pm UTC

I'm all over letting people know that they're jackasses.
My office parking space has a security card reader attached to a wall next to a small car space. This small car space is clearly marked as such with three separate signs - painted on the ground, posted on the wall alongside the card reader, and posted on the wall at the end of the space, so right in front of the driver as they pull in - yet about 50% of the cars i find parked there can no way be classified as small. As they often extend beyond the end of the space - on account of not being small cars, obviously - they block access to the card reader, meaning anyone wishing to drive into the secured area has to get out of their car to swipe their card. (I cycle so it's not such a big deal, but it's the principle, you know?)
I regularly leave hand-written* full-page notes on windshields, usually along the lines of "How do you figure this thing qualifies as a small car, supergenius / jackass / etc.**? Sorry about your car". Not that I've ever damaged anyone's car, but I am sorry they're idiots. I also keep a lumber crayon in my satchel for drawing parking lines on top of cars that extend beyond their marked space, or marking up windshields in case I don't have any paper handy.
Finally, I have some easily accessible "you park like a jackass" stickers that I can rip off and slap on a side window as I whip by on my bike, for those special citizens who are incapable of aligning their cars closer than three feet from the kerb. Now those guys really tick me off, as a cyclist.
Yes, I am a jackass. But my days are so much brighter for it...

* it's the personal touch that means so much.
** varies depending on degree of ridiculousness of size of car and level of parking skill inadequacy.

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Mighty Jalapeno
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Mighty Jalapeno » Mon Mar 30, 2009 10:08 pm UTC

Shopping at lunch, I saw a guy parked accross two handicapped stalls. He had the proper Handicapped thing hanging from his mirror, but still... are you double-handicapped, or what? It's a Toyota! IT FITS IN ONE!!!

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Dark Lord Of Sheetmetal » Mon Mar 30, 2009 10:17 pm UTC

Just want to point out that is the wrong sort of torch for that application.

Seriously.

Points for giving him goggles though. :)

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Iridos
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Iridos » Mon Mar 30, 2009 10:31 pm UTC

crzftx wrote: If you're talking about people lobbying to key cars poorly parked, that is a form of punishment. Ask any parent, punishment is for the greater good.


Allow me to lynch you next time we meet ... say for having excessive and stupid opinions - I promise it'll be for the greater good!

What I'm trying to tell you: It's not your place to pass judgment on others, that's what the there is a legal system for - and there's a really good reason for this, too... of course, it may be fun to chase/torture/beat up/kill homosexuals or foreigners or other people who're not really our sort of people, but life can't all be fun, so you'll have to leave it (within the limits of the law) to the executive whom you have given this power via your democratic system.

---------------------------------------




Aikee wrote:hahaha
this reminds me of the time my mom got irritated at a van parked like this....and then we saw the driver get in the car-he was in an electric wheelchair, and needed to operate a lift in order to get in. it made me laugh at my mom.


[3 other posts]

Mighty Jalapeno wrote:Shopping at lunch, I saw a guy parked accross two handicapped stalls. He had the proper Handicapped thing hanging from his mirror, but still... are you double-handicapped, or what? It's a Toyota! IT FITS IN ONE!!!


Well, notice something? (:

Possibly the same guy =P


I.

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Cadvin
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Cadvin » Mon Mar 30, 2009 11:43 pm UTC

Voco, no one’s going to smash your windshield just because you have a red car. People here are mad because people intentionally park across two places. As you’ve seen, only two people have actually keyed a car because they were putting their perfect paintjob cars across two compact places intentionally, or whatever.

Actually, if you go back to page one, you'll see that philsov (jokingly) did talk green. So piss off.


Oh. My. God. Key word: JOKINGLY. If someone talks jokingly, then they do not mean what they say. They are being satire. Just thought you needed to know that, because you obviously didn’t know.

And just so you know, I don't have blind hatred against big cars, especially ones that are put to a use. I do have a little hatred to those GIGANTIC trucks spewing out fumes that make you double over choking, driven by some seventeen year old with spiked hair, shiny and parked across three spaces to protect the precious paint job, with rock playing full blast because he's almost too deaf to hear it anymore from his five foot tall sub-woofers, driven by the people to flip the bird if the person in front of you stops and you have to stop, and obviously never going to be used to haul anything in it's life until it's old and beaten up.
Now, say, if it's a reasonable sized pick up truck, used for what it was meant for, simply too large to be parked in one space, then that's absolutely fine, especially seeing as most of those people tend to park farther away anyway.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby XbHW_TestEngr » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:42 am UTC

Wow! Did someone (or a few someones) wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?
Or, put another way, who pissed your Wheaties this morning?
Relax people! It's a comic strip! Geez!

People do selfish stuff. Yes, that includes you. And, it includes me ... I do stupid, selfish stuff sometimes. Please accept my apology.
Some people (like my ex-wife) just @(#$@#^ can't park a vehicle straight. (She's the only person I know who can back up to try to straighten out and end up worse than before.)
Some people insist that the speed they are driving on the highway/freeway is the speed everyone behind them needs to be going and won't pull over into the slow lane.
Some people wear an air of superiority because they consider themselves more ____________ (green, charitable, humble, richer, frugal, whatever?!?) than those around them.

Deal is this: you can choose to be angry, or you can choose to let it roll off you back. I spent too many good of my life years pissed off at the world because it wasn't being run the way I thought it should be run. Since I've grown older (and hopefully wiser), stuff like this just isn't that important; it ain't worth worrying about. That particular idiot getting on your nerves did not wake up this morning and think "how can I piss off _(your name here)__ today?" It wasn't personal ... let it go ... you'll probably live longer and have a happier life.

But, in my dreams ... BHG ftw!
... and there will be cake.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby SomethingAwesome » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:44 am UTC

What I'm trying to tell you: It's not your place to pass judgment on others, that's what the there is a legal system for - and there's a really good reason for this, too... of course, it may be fun to chase/torture/beat up/kill homosexuals or foreigners or other people who're not really our sort of people, but life can't all be fun, so you'll have to leave it (within the limits of the law) to the executive whom you have given this power via your democratic system.

What? No.

Ofcourse it is everybody's place to pass judgment on others. Society, and everybody here is part of society, can pass judgment as much as it likes.

However, we, as a society, have chosen to defer most of the punishment and "proper judgment" to central systems. (Well, actually, no, it was always a central system. In tribes it would be the chief, or the elders or something that determined guilt and punishment. It just grew from there.)

Interesting thing is, not all punishments are are calculable in either monetary recompense or jailtime. Some of it is social shunning (or ridicule in online forums maybe). Some of it is people that again and again pester you with messages left on your windshield. This is social punishment. Deal with it, it's part of how civilization actually works.

So, anyway, I can pass judgment however much I like.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby snafubar » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:49 am UTC

If you have a nice car that you want to park across two spaces so no one can get close and risk scratching it that's totally fine... if you do it in the back corner of the parking lot where no one wants to park next to you anyway. If you really care about your car that is the correct way to do it (and for that matter back there you probably don't need to take two spaces anyway since no one will park next to you). Taking up multiple spaces in prime space just risks someone getting angry and keying it or trying to fit in next to it anyway.

Then again I don't know how often you can actually find two open spaces together in prime space unless you arrive incredibly early to wherever you're going.
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby OBloodyHell » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:53 am UTC

My own solution is a bit less destructive. I basically misadjust their sideview mirrors, particularly the one on the passenger side. Even with power mirrors, it's about the same level of nuisance to adjust them both back to correct.

I'd prefer something that let them know WHY it happened (a business card that says "Learn to park, DICKHEAD!"), but that's more trouble than I'm willing to commit to, most of the time.

.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby ThemePark » Tue Mar 31, 2009 12:58 am UTC

XbHW_TestEngr wrote:Deal is this: you can choose to be angry, or you can choose to let it roll off you back. I spent too many good of my life years pissed off at the world because it wasn't being run the way I thought it should be run. Since I've grown older (and hopefully wiser), stuff like this just isn't that important; it ain't worth worrying about. That particular idiot getting on your nerves did not wake up this morning and think "how can I piss off _(your name here)__ today?" It wasn't personal ... let it go ... you'll probably live longer and have a happier life.

This is so incredibly true that if I wanted one, I would use this as my sig. Heck, I might do it anyway.

I am guilty as charged in regards to this. So thank you for giving me a little something to think about.
I have traveled from 1979 to be a member of the unofficial board Council of Elders. Phear M3

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby rubber314chicken » Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:23 am UTC

Spacemilk wrote:
TheHand wrote:I suppose cars who are built too big to fit in spaces even when parked correctly would be s**t out of luck huh?


That would be correct. If you are enough of a tool to drive an unnecessarily large car like a hummer or a huge truck, then you can pay for it by parking a mile away and walking to make up at least a little for what you're doing to the environment.


Hmm.. sometimes large trucks are necessary. Ever heard of having to tow stuff or take a bed full of cargo?

Snowdream wrote:I confess, normally I'm levelheaded... However:

One day, at the movies; I noticed a gigantic black pick-up truck taking up >SIX< parking spaces. This parking lot is known for being way to small, and I was so far back, and I just have my tiny little VW. I was beyond pissed off. I don't mind walking, I like it; but just the fact that I could have been a lot closer, really made me loose my mind; also the audacity of this driver; clearly he did this on purpose.

Soooo... I went to my movie. Kill Bill.

When I came out, his truck was still there, and it was now night. My anger broiled in me, and... I remember putting my key between my ring and middle finger... as I was walking behind his truck, going back to my car; my arm suddenly went straight, and I whited out -- a second later, I looked back and saw a nice wavy key scratch on his car.

The key mark was very well done, it matched the bounce in my walk very well, luckily I'm so tall that it was exactly parallel with my arm - right where everyone can see my tag. I had a friend with me, her mouth was hanging open for a long while; and she didn't talk to me for a couple of days.

However, now she thinks it was one of my greater moments.

While I don't agree with scratching the paint (how would you like it?) sometimes that is nessicary. Never in such a crowded lot though. For example, I'm towing a trailer cross country. I stop at a McD's to get lunch. I don't have a way to lock the trailer so it can't be stolen if I un hitch it in a single spot and park next to it. So I park across the spaces.

Wearyman wrote:I've keyed more than one car that was blatantly parked across multiple spaces.

Of course, only cars that are CLEARLY intentionally parked that way.

(IE: Not just slightly over the line or crowding one side, but WAY over the line with 1/2 the car in one spot and 1/2 the car in another. I'm also much more forgiving during winter when it's often hard to see the lines.)

But yeah, more than one car has had to have a full paint job due to my keys or a small nearby stone.


haha... my dad has made me park like that ("dad there are like 3 feet to the left, can I just move it over so we only take up two spots not 4 (the truck is really long and if you only take one the bed sticks out like none other.) "no, there is like nobody here. now they will not park next to us")

But sticking windshield wipers up is more fun. especially if its a midget driver.

Angrist wrote:I find it hilarious that large cars are commonly put down upon for their poor fuel economy when often times they actually aren't that bad. Case in point: At 70 miles an hour for interstate driving (legal speed limit here in Florida), my '92 Buick Roadmaster (wider than a Chevy Suburban; really huge boat - and it was inherited, not my choice) gets 27 mpg - better than my roommate's '95 Corolla, which gets 25. Of course, in-town mileage is a nightmare, but that's why I have a '77 Peugeot 103 moped...

As for the disabling or damaging of cars that park annoyingly, there are far better methods than keying or kicking... one is to take the drive wheels of the car and put them up on blocks so they are 1/16" off the ground. Wheels just spin and spin. Another good way is to pull the old Beverly Hills Cop trick of a "banana in the tailpipe." This has the advantage of allowing them to clear the parking spot, but killing the motor as they're driving along, hopefully causing them to get a ticket for double parking on the street :)

Edit: Another note: I always laugh at those who claim that they're helping the environment by buying a Prius, when an H3 does less damage environmentally over the lifespans of the vehicles (the nickel mining for the batteries is pretty evil... worse than strip mining for coal, and I know something about that).


My dads 4.6L truck gets 18. My sister's shittly driving gets her v-6 3L minivan a measly 12mpg. The point is, drive nice. Your engine should NEVER cross 2,000 Rpm under normal acceleration. I can count the number of times I've had a car over that on one hand (actually, both were approaching 5,000 RPM, but it was to prevent an accident from happening. like a bus rear ending a parked car or someone wrongly slowing so I can yeild onto the highway...)

and guys, diesel is the way of the future, not electric cars. Especially since they can run on biodiesel.

And some people park like that to keep their car safe. For example if you have a nice hot rod, you'd park it a way away so nobody would park there and angle it so nobody hits it trying to pull in next to you. Just don't do that when space is a premium.
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Your.Master » Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:30 am UTC

We got no end of shit from somebody after parking an SUV over two spaces in a parking lot with plenty of extra space.

We were parking at the fucking dialysis place. My grandma needed dialysis, and is wheelchair-bound; we couldn't really reschedule this based on the parking situation. There was a goddamned sportscar parked in the only wheelchair parking spot at the time we parked. There was not at the time the asshole* was cussing us out both for the fuel-efficiency of the vehicle and the parking job.

So if I see you keying any vehicle I am going to confront you, and if you don't know context beyond "it's in two spaces" I will make you stop if I can. There's a damned good reason we defer punishment to the legal system.

* You aren't necessarily an asshole for calling somebody on shit like bad parking. But you are if you cannot comprehend mitigating circumstances.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby limerick » Tue Mar 31, 2009 2:26 am UTC

Oh, God, I know how THIS feels.

I live right by a college, and the college kids always park on our street, yeah?
So there was this JERK who decided to park his big fancy truck right in front of our house, taking up both of the two possible parking spaces.
So my mom parks behind him, literally bumper to bumper. She bumped our car gently against the back of his car.
And this JERK has the audacity to come TO OUR DOOR and start cussing my mom out, telling her she's ruining his car and that if she does it again, he'll call the cops.
I am in full support of an ASSHOLE HAD IT COMING law.

His car was scratch free, the JERK.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Iridos » Tue Mar 31, 2009 2:38 am UTC

XbHW_TestEngr wrote:Wow! Did someone (or a few someones) wake up on the wrong side of the bed this morning?


Hehe... ok - perhaps that was just "it" - I got pretty pissed myself off reading all those close-to-paramilitary sounding stuff - but perhaps some people just didn't get their coffee or their smoke and had to verbally get rid of some aggression.

XbHW_TestEngr wrote:People do selfish stuff. Yes, that includes you. And, it includes me ... I do stupid, selfish stuff sometimes.

My point exactly... everybody is at both ends of this sometimes - nobody is the perfect courteous human being or driver all the time - and I think these posts prove it.
The guy whose car tries to eat your rear bumper because he wants to overtake you and you can't pull over because the right lane is blocked is probably 100 times worse than the bad parker - after all he endangers your life more directly than through a heart attack caused by a high blood pressure =-P

SomethingAwesome wrote:
What I'm trying to tell you: It's not your place to pass judgment on others, that's what the there is a legal system for - and there's a really good reason for this, too... of course, it may be fun to chase/torture/beat up/kill homosexuals or foreigners or other people who're not really our sort of people, but life can't all be fun, so you'll have to leave it (within the limits of the law) to the executive whom you have given this power via your democratic system.

What? No.

Ofcourse it is everybody's place to pass judgment on others. Society, and everybody here is part of society, can pass judgment as much as it likes.


Dunno why you want to nit-pick there, when you obviously agree in principle. Of course _legal_ judgment is not something you have a right to do on your own. Legally people are considered innocent of a crime until a court has found them guilty.

Of course you judge people/situations/the quality of your lunch everyday - but that doesn't normally end up in scratching their car/face/intestine/eyeball. I thought from context it was pretty clear that I referred to judgment in a legal sense (i.e. leading to punishment) ....

I.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby '; DROP DATABASE;-- » Tue Mar 31, 2009 3:41 am UTC

Oh YES. Man if he came around here, just about every car would be cut in half. People seem to think the idea is to park on top of the lines.
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby GoodRudeFun » Tue Mar 31, 2009 4:05 am UTC

You know, I'd prefer leaving something messy, not damaging. That way it can be cleaned, and isn't a couple hundred bucks, but still conveys the level of inconvenience and annoyance they inflict on others.


I'm thinking of making something like water balloons filled with mayo, or eggs, or something that will go rancid in the summer sun for these types of people. If I ever notice someone doing it continually I'll prepare for it just for that occasion.


AS to the large car issue: its understandable when you're an adult and have to work. If you're a rich kid, you have a bro decal on your back window, and you play music NO ONE wants to hear, I'm just not going to like you. If you're double parked I will do something to your car, because you're twice the douche.

Understand that this is ONLY on occasion when I actually see them getting out of their cars. Also understand that this is almost every single day I need to go into town. Spoiled rich kid bros need to get knocked down a peg.
Oh. Well that's alright then.

dosboot
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby dosboot » Tue Mar 31, 2009 4:58 am UTC

There's like two people who have posted to this thread who haven't frightened me. What's wrong with you people?

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby pinkgothic » Tue Mar 31, 2009 5:12 am UTC

dosboot wrote:There's like two people who have posted to this thread who haven't frightened me. What's wrong with you people?


Me! Me, me, me! *waves hand in air hoping to be picked, then blurts out answer before anyone can:*

We read xkcd and the classhole is [not so] secretly our hero? :mrgreen:

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby darkspork » Tue Mar 31, 2009 5:17 am UTC

When my parents had their old beat up Honda, some jackass parked so the entire front half of his car blocked our driveway. We got in the driveway anyhow, but I'm almost certain the guy had to replace his front bumper. I think he keyed our car back, but it wasn't noticeable. This wasn't the type of car with a paint job that anyone cared about.
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby speqter » Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:21 am UTC

Luthen wrote:EDIT: Shouldn't BHG have cut the rear bumpers off all the cars? They're all sticking out.


Nah. BHG's car is sticking out too.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Fougare » Tue Mar 31, 2009 7:59 am UTC

Drama aside.

Ah, the memories...
My dad works as a mechanic, we often take old non-fixable cars left by customers to the junk yard. However the junk yard requires you to have the car registered to your name and turn in the title when you junk a car (i.e. you "sell" them your car, you can't just give them a car)

This one time we somehow got stuck with an old pick up truck, didn't even have the bed, and no way to contact the owner to take it to the yard, so we took a oscillating saw (no blowtorch) and cut the car into 8 pieces in a few hours so that the scrap-metal guy could take it as scrap instead of as a "car".

Looks like BHG has the right idea, a circular saw would slice the entire shell in less than 10 minutes, the torch would help weaken the main chassis frame enough for the saw to not get stuck in the equivalent of a 4x4 made of steel. Then there's the problem of the engine; for the most part a car is a shell only a few inches thick, however the engine is nearly a solid mass, no way a circular saw easily can cut through it. Most modern engines are cast aluminum, nice and soft, but still too thick to be neatly cut without prying open the body which would result in a not-as-clean-as-the-comic slice of the car.

As for the relocating of the half of the car, we have to push cars often, a lighter car (corolla/focus style) can easily be pushed by one person. Half a car is much lighter (half as heavy to be exact) to move around, even if you aren't on 4 wheels and dragging it, you would just damage the asphalt a bit but very possible to do. Regarding the alt-text: you should always wear gloves and a face mask for heavy duty work, there is no fingerprints and no spit/DNA left behind to ID the perpetrator of the crime, and a dozen people watching don't want to get involved with an angry guy wielding a blowtorch. There's also the possibility that everyone could have thought they were part of a reality-prank show and waited for the punch-line and thus didn't pay attention to who did it.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby martin878 » Tue Mar 31, 2009 8:30 am UTC

Does anyone else remember the days before BHG was evil? http://xkcd.com/77/ When did it all change?

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby breintje » Tue Mar 31, 2009 9:18 am UTC

SomethingAwesome wrote:
What I'm trying to tell you: It's not your place to pass judgment on others, that's what the there is a legal system for - and there's a really good reason for this, too... of course, it may be fun to chase/torture/beat up/kill homosexuals or foreigners or other people who're not really our sort of people, but life can't all be fun, so you'll have to leave it (within the limits of the law) to the executive whom you have given this power via your democratic system.

What? No.

Ofcourse it is everybody's place to pass judgment on others. Society, and everybody here is part of society, can pass judgment as much as it likes.

So, if you see someone coming at 150 mph on the hard shoulder past a traffic jam you will turn right to stop him/her, because he/she clearly violates law AND is being quite a jerk for trying to bypass a long wait?
Or, if you see a SUV parked badly and across two spaces you will key it?

Answer for yourself and THEN read the spoilers.

Spoiler:
Suppose you have a wife/husband that is deadly allergic to, for instance, wasp stings. When she/he is stung you have 15 minutes to get to the hospital. That means you drive a good 60 ms-1 on the hard shoulder on the highway, because there is a big traffic jam. Suddenly some zealot throws to the right in a weird fit of righteousness, and then blocks the road driving at walking speed. Even if you manage to avoid hitting him, which would kill both of you, or rolling the car over on the berm, this jackass just killed your partner. Woops.

Spoiler:
As some of you might know a house doctor, or GP, has no special car. That is, no ambulance colours or blue lights. GP's however, at least in the Netherlands, do work emergency shifts during time when the practices are closed. So, if someone is having a heart attack, or any of the like, the doctor will come rushing in, and throw his/her car, in my corner of the country quite often a 4WD, somewhere to the side of the road. And as a thanks for saving someone's life he/she gets a nice scratch on the paint. Way to go.

So, although you might judge someone, it is most definately not your place to pass the judgement. At least not at that moment, or without letting the subject speak in his/her defence.
Breintje

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby phonon266737 » Tue Mar 31, 2009 11:51 am UTC

The answer is easy - make a law and a $50 fine. Then police officers can make rounds in shopping mall parking lots, get a quick run of tickets under thei belt, and let some of us off the hook for speeding that day. Or, just hire a ticket-giver. All tickets must include a photo from the rear and side of the vehicle, and tickets are based on each tire outside of spot, multiplied by the sin of the angular deviation from the correct alignment.

Speaking of torches, my old roomate used to cut old camaros apart in our garage. He was resotirng a nice one, and would purchase case for next to nothing for a lone part or so, ebay the rest of the car, then cut it into pieces and scrap it. It didn't pay for much besides the rest of his resotration, and at one point he actually had to hire an attorney to defend himself in court for allegation of running a "chop shop". It's not illegal if you own the cars, though!

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby Random832 » Tue Mar 31, 2009 1:50 pm UTC

phonon266737 wrote:The answer is easy - make a law and a $50 fine. Then police officers can make rounds in shopping mall parking lots, get a quick run of tickets under thei belt, and let some of us off the hook for speeding that day. Or, just hire a ticket-giver. All tickets must include a photo from the rear and side of the vehicle, and tickets are based on each tire outside of spot, multiplied by the sin of the angular deviation from the correct alignment.


Who cares what angle it's at - just measure the number of inches that the car is outside the line. Your solution = car parked perfectly parallel to the line gets its ticket multiplied by zero.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby dennisw » Tue Mar 31, 2009 2:00 pm UTC

Fougare wrote:... however the engine is nearly a solid mass, no way a circular saw easily can cut through it. ...

... Half a car is much lighter (half as heavy to be exact) ...


Not exactly. The half of the car that BHG moved had much less engine in it than the part that he didn't (assuming a front-engine car). Which also means that he didn't have to cut through it either.

phonon266737 wrote:The answer is easy - make a law and a $50 fine. Then police officers can make rounds in shopping mall parking lots, ...


At least in the parts of the US with which I'm familiar, these parking lots are private property and not subject to the jurisdiction of parking laws that govern street-side and other non-private parking. The lot owners, however, could post and enforce a towing policy, but being over-aggressive with this is bad for business.

...multiplied by the sin of the angular deviation...

measured using their official police-issue protractor
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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby brainfreeze215 » Tue Mar 31, 2009 2:06 pm UTC

My solution to parking douchebags: Drive a motorcycle.

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Re: "Parking" Discussion

Postby DSenette » Tue Mar 31, 2009 2:14 pm UTC

i USED to have a "borrowed" (ok...stolen) parking authority boot that i'd keep in my trunk for just such an occasion...anyone parked with any resemblance of douche-baggery got the boot....for obvious reasons i no longer have the boot....but i do keep a bag of those industrial sized Zip ties in my glove box....if i see someone parked like an ass i just zip 5 or 6 of them onto their drive shafts, axles, or any other rotating part within reach....the faster they drive the faster this mysterious knocking sound is... you'd be surprised how well you can hide these things on the higher vehicles (usually big trucks are the worst offenders)....in SOME parking lots...they've got bars or cables in front of the cars (to keep people from jumping i guess)...i've been known to zip tie someone's bumper to those hoping they don't notice before they drive off

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