0887: "Future Timeline"

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SW15243
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0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby SW15243 » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:21 am UTC

Image omitted for lengthiness

Alt-text: "Not shown: the approximately 30,000 identical, vaguely hysterical articles titled "WHITE PEOPLE IN [THE US/BRITAIN] TO BECOME MINORITY BY [YEAR]!", which came up for basically any year I put in."

Goodness gracious, that's a lot to read!

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Jahoclave » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:22 am UTC

Dibs on Battlestar Galactica captaincy.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby J the Ninja » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:23 am UTC

The ending was epic if you read through the whole thing. This is going to be available as a poster, right?
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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Sundew » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:23 am UTC

I laughed at 2101.

Quite a good comic.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Tsunoba » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:24 am UTC

Final one was totally worth reading the entire thing.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Flaps » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:24 am UTC

Can't wait till '69.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby NuclearWinter » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:25 am UTC

Quite a long and intricate All your base joke. Good stuff.
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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby scikidus » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:26 am UTC

As someone who loves predictions, this is a goldmine. The ending is great too :D

Two errors I noticed: the word "debt" is misspelled in 2013, and the orangutans snippet is missing its line in 2024. Otherwise, congrats Randal. I can see why this took a little longer to go up. Well worth the wait.
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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Azkyroth » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:29 am UTC

*sigh* funny, but...

...cue quote-mining by various stripes of denialist in 3, 2, 1... x.x

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Shvabrov » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:32 am UTC

2060: Extreme draughts across much of earth
Presumably that's a far more hardcore version of draughts, maybe with real people as the pieces? (and when you're eaten, you actually are eaten)

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Whyareall » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:33 am UTC

Best. Punchline. EVER.
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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Greatgreen » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:33 am UTC

I love the line "Atlantis begins to reappear".

I immediately thought "Oh! Hi guys. I just had some stuff, you know, to do. Did you see that tidal wave? Phwoah."

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby MikeStern » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:35 am UTC

That last one was pure win. However the comic really is a very interesting view into how we, as a society, predict the future. Especially interesting are contradicting and repeated statements. You really have to wonder where the predictions come from, and why some of them are so shaky.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby phlip » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:37 am UTC

I like the completely un-elaborated-on "2066: Cyprus achieves its goal"...

Also the rollercoaster that is the US debt. Obviously they're taken out of context, but still.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Jahoclave » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:38 am UTC

MikeStern wrote:That last one was pure win. However the comic really is a very interesting view into how we, as a society, predict the future. Especially interesting are contradicting and repeated statements. You really have to wonder where the predictions come from, and why some of them are so shaky.

Look, my predictions always come true after the event I claim them to be in reference to happened.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Shiyiya » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:39 am UTC

phlip wrote:I like the completely un-elaborated-on "2066: Cyprus achieves its goal"...

Also the rollercoaster that is the US debt. Obviously they're taken out of context, but still.


And how social security runs out like, every other year.
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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby phlip » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:42 am UTC

Shvabrov wrote:2060: Extreme draughts across much of earth
Presumably that's a far more hardcore version of draughts, maybe with real people as the pieces? (and when you're eaten, you actually are eaten)

I noticed that one too... I wonder if it's [sic], or just Randall messing up.

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enum ಠ_ಠ {°□°╰=1, °Д°╰, ಠ益ಠ╰};
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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Comic JK » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:45 am UTC

I'll bet after this, people will add their projections just to fill in those lonely missing years.

Why no love for 2042? That's when we'll learn the meaning of Life, the Universe, and Everything.
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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby st0aty » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:47 am UTC

Absolutely awesome comic... Was I the only one reading the list and counting off what could potentially occur in my own lifetime, then breathing a sigh of relief when I read immortality? ;-)

A real eye opener to how we see ourselves moving forward...

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby mjc0961 » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:52 am UTC

2069 is going to be a rather messy year...

Shiyiya wrote:
phlip wrote:I like the completely un-elaborated-on "2066: Cyprus achieves its goal"...

Also the rollercoaster that is the US debt. Obviously they're taken out of context, but still.


And how social security runs out like, every other year.

And don't forget how often the newspaper becomes obsolete and dies. :P

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Chuq » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:55 am UTC

"2100 - Gilette introduces 14-bladed razor"

But they've already done a 16-bladed one! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjEKt5Izwbo

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby SlyReaper » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:55 am UTC

2040: Nanotechnology makes humans immortal.

Please please please let this one be true.
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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby glasnt » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:59 am UTC

I was waiting for the 2101 entry.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby scharb » Mon Apr 18, 2011 6:59 am UTC

In 2068, from his throne in Jerusalem, Lord Jesus rules over the entire gay world and legalizes public masturbation.
Just a very funny image that those events are so close together.

In the latter half of the 21st century, the vast majority of the American population will become obese watching 3D TV in their domed city prisons (linked by high-speed rail.) With so many Americans imprisoned, productivity will plummet, causing GDP to shrink massively compared to the debt. The retirement age will shift without anybody noticing, because nobody's working.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby phlip » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:01 am UTC

Chuq wrote:"2100 - Gilette introduces 14-bladed razor"

But they've already done a 16-bladed one! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GjEKt5Izwbo


Pff, everyone knows we're going to get infinity-bladed razors in 2015...

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby MikeStern » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:05 am UTC

st0aty wrote:Absolutely awesome comic... Was I the only one reading the list and counting off what could potentially occur in my own lifetime, then breathing a sigh of relief when I read immortality? ;-)


You certainly weren't the only one. I even remarked on the fact that by that prediction I would only have to keep myself alive for another 39 years. Then, hopefully, we can eat all the bacon we want :)

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Avaviel » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:07 am UTC

What's up with that text near the top where the 'current links' typically go?

13Z6Ej4fMc9gS1uXgGU2yzurU6kTLi4EXd

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby iamevn » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:08 am UTC

Anyone know what the thing in the banner means?

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13Z6Ej4fMc9gS1uXgGU2yzurU6kTLi4EXd


Edit: gorram ninjas

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby TiLt » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:09 am UTC

Had me confused for a minute, the front page was still the apartments one, I thought the RSS feed was lying to me again.
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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby puffenstuff » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:12 am UTC

Also in tiny print at the bottom of the page.

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We did not invent the algorithm. The algorithm consistently finds Jesus. The algorithm killed Jeeves. 
The algorithm is banned in China. The algorithm is from Jersey. The algorithm constantly finds Jesus.
This is not the algorithm. This is close.


Edit: Hm. Google says that is from years ago. I just never noticed it.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby phlip » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:16 am UTC

Avaviel wrote:What's up with that text near the top where the 'current links' typically go?

13Z6Ej4fMc9gS1uXgGU2yzurU6kTLi4EXd

I think it's a Bitcoin address... that's the only thing I know of that would be a 34-character-long string like that...

TiLt wrote:Had me confused for a minute, the front page was still the apartments one, I thought the RSS feed was lying to me again.

Clear your cache and do a hard-refresh. Caches tend to break stuff from time to time, and you should always try this before thinking a page is (a) broken, or (b) out of date.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby iamevn » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:20 am UTC

phlip wrote:
Avaviel wrote:What's up with that text near the top where the 'current links' typically go?

13Z6Ej4fMc9gS1uXgGU2yzurU6kTLi4EXd

I think it's a Bitcoin address... that's the only thing I know of that would be a 34-character-long string like that...


sounds good, this whole Potato ARG has had me looking for meaning in things like this

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Oneiros42 » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:24 am UTC

I need to take issue with the 2012 prediction of Canada cutting its greenhouse emissions.

We have (and have had for an unfortunate six years now) a Conservative government. Not as right-wing as, say, American Republicans, but they definitely WANT to be. As a result, they have declared a war on environmentalism. Where Canada once led the charge on the world stage, now has been lambasted by other nations for our lack of effort. We're having another election very soon, and if the Conservatives get another minority government (or, God help us, a majority), then I expect our government to continue to emulate its American idols and further reduce and eliminate environmental programs in favour of corporations.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Covarr » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:26 am UTC

Aww, so does this mean Half Life 3 is never coming out?

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby FourTael » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:47 am UTC

"Rain forest mostly gone due to climate shifts."

I lol'd.

Mid-Pliocene, people. Mid-Pliocene.

It seems that, as the predictions get further away, they get more and more absurd and apocalyptic. Whatever happened to, "The future will be better tomorrow"?

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby WhiteAvenger » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:50 am UTC

phlip wrote:Pff, everyone knows we're going to get infinity-bladed razors in 2015...


We already have 2000-bladed razors: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UBT1NgnWQzw

Back to topic, that was a lot of text to read for an All Your Base joke.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby phlip » Mon Apr 18, 2011 7:53 am UTC

WhiteAvenger wrote:Back to topic, that was a lot of text to read for an All Your Base joke.

Just because it was the last joke, doesn't mean it was the main joke, and everything else was setup for it... it just means it was the last joke.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby Temple_1989 » Mon Apr 18, 2011 8:03 am UTC

Please make this into a poster.
I'd love to have a reference on my wall for just how accurate Google is.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby midian » Mon Apr 18, 2011 8:28 am UTC

bravo. bravo. RM on top form.

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Re: 0887: "Future Timeline"

Postby ravemastaj » Mon Apr 18, 2011 8:38 am UTC

Nice. I didn't see that coming.

But you missed peak phosphorus, which will cause widespread famine in about 20-30 years.


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