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Oregonaut
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 12:37 pm UTC

Small penis?
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The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby SecondTalon » Tue May 24, 2011 12:44 pm UTC

No, that's just me.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 12:45 pm UTC

Oh, Felstaff is hung like bull?
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The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby phlip » Tue May 24, 2011 12:47 pm UTC

It happens for me at work (Firefox on Windows), but not at home (Firefox in Linux). I haven't tried other browsers at work, so I dunno, but it's probably specific to that combination.

And yes, by "it", I mean small penises.

Code: Select all

enum ಠ_ಠ {°□°╰=1, °Д°╰, ಠ益ಠ╰};
void ┻━┻︵​╰(ಠ_ಠ ⚠) {exit((int)⚠);}
[he/him/his]

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby emceng » Tue May 24, 2011 12:54 pm UTC

You would think someone even moderately competent would send equipment with oh, say the power cable actually wired into the device, when they know we have to power it up.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby bigglesworth » Tue May 24, 2011 1:07 pm UTC

Oregonaut wrote:Small penis?

2"/10
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 1:09 pm UTC

Not so epic page topper is not so epic.
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The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Menacing Spike » Tue May 24, 2011 1:58 pm UTC

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=8282

They had me going for a while, then I went "waaaaaitaminute", and the penny dropped when they went on aboot the moose coins.
Excellent satire.

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 2:00 pm UTC

>.>
<.<
They have phones that you can carry outside the house and use now, too.
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The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Menacing Spike » Tue May 24, 2011 2:11 pm UTC

No less an authority than Robert Schadewald wrote -- in the SKEPTICAL INQUIRER NO LESS! -- that "...flat-earthism is as well supported scripturally and scientifically as creationism."

Now let's do the math. 55% of all American voters believe in creationism. If flat-earthism is as valid scripturally AND SCIENTIFICALLY as creationism, then OVER HALF OF ALL AMERICANS should, based on Christian beliefs, find that flat-earthism is valid.

157,118,453.25 American Christians believe that God's Word is better than scientific snot-hole-ism about evolution. Why should Christian scripture indicating a flat earth be any less believable?

I'll bet you doubters just think scripture is a pile of stupid superstition that should be eliminated from the human mental gene pool. God hates people like you.


Never knew there were other sites aside from 4chan that were based on trolling new users.

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby broken_escalator » Tue May 24, 2011 3:16 pm UTC

emceng wrote:You would think someone even moderately competent would send equipment with oh, say the power cable actually wired into the device, when they know we have to power it up.

You're supposed to install a coil and run around it with magnets, obviously.

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Tinman42 » Tue May 24, 2011 3:32 pm UTC

Menacing Spike wrote:http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=8282

They had me going for a while, then I went "waaaaaitaminute", and the penny dropped when they went on aboot the moose coins.
Excellent satire.


This had me laughing way too loud during work. I feel bad for the troll food.
Last edited by Tinman42 on Tue May 24, 2011 3:50 pm UTC, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby podbaydoor » Tue May 24, 2011 3:34 pm UTC

The penny dropped for me when I came across the thread about beating your wife according to Biblical scripture.

I don't laugh that much, though. It just makes me sad, because I know Landover is satire, but plenty of respectable citizens in America actually believe that shite.

broken_escalator wrote:
emceng wrote:You would think someone even moderately competent would send equipment with oh, say the power cable actually wired into the device, when they know we have to power it up.

You're supposed to install a coil and run around it with magnets, obviously.

To be sung to the tune of "The Mulberry Bush."
tenet |ˈtenit|
noun
a principle or belief, esp. one of the main principles of a religion or philosophy : the tenets of classical liberalism.
tenant |ˈtenənt|
noun
a person who occupies land or property rented from a landlord.

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Zarq » Tue May 24, 2011 3:36 pm UTC

Either I've become a lot less gullible than 2-3 years ago, or they don't even try to fool people anymore.

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Felstaff » Tue May 24, 2011 4:16 pm UTC

phlip wrote:It happens for me at work (Firefox on Windows), but not at home (Firefox in Linux). I haven't tried other browsers at work, so I dunno, but it's probably specific to that combination.

And yes, by "it", I mean small penises.

I set the minimum font size to 10 on Firefox, and the Zalgo problem has disappeared.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby SecondTalon » Tue May 24, 2011 4:22 pm UTC

I rather like the Zalgo problem. It lets me quickly and easily know who to hate.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby broken_escalator » Tue May 24, 2011 5:53 pm UTC

b͓͇̦͕͊̊ͨ̚͞u͓͖̰̹͙̙̔̃̏ͯ̚t̫͈̟̰ ̼͒̅̍ͧͨ̑ͪ͘w̷̥͈͔ē͔̦͈̎͞ ̵̹͓̙̟ͯ̂ͩ̿̊̄̓ͅl̴͔̻͕̜ͣ̈ͫͮơ͓̯͙ͩ͆ͫ̚v̖̀ͣe̠͕̫͇͙̘̣͑ͪ ̱̙̙̮͉̯͔ͮ̿͛̏͐͆͜ŷ̺̤̮͈͓̞̲́̆ͮ̀̀̚o͌̔͒̋ü̧͈̲ͅͅ

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 6:04 pm UTC

I need to get a good 500cc bike, and I need to not spend a lot of money on this 500cc bike. The internet is not helping these two goals cooperate.
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The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby felltir » Tue May 24, 2011 6:11 pm UTC

I wish I was old enough to get a bike that wasn't shite.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 6:14 pm UTC

I need a 500cc to get back into riding again. My shoulder and knee should be ok with it now. But my old 1,000cc crapped out, and is basically a pile of junk anyway. I'm not sure I'd feel comfortable manuevering it anyway right now.
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The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby broken_escalator » Tue May 24, 2011 6:21 pm UTC

The only cc I know is from mario kart back in the day.

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Oregonaut » Tue May 24, 2011 6:23 pm UTC

broken_escalator wrote:The only cc I know is from mario kart back in the day.

A 50cc would laugh at me.
- Ochigo the Earth-Stomper

The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby emceng » Tue May 24, 2011 6:37 pm UTC

I've thought about getting a motorcycle, but two things are stopping me. 1) Lack of confidence in my driving skills, and 2) knowing I would want to drive 120 mph down the interstate. Not a good combination, unless I have a death wish.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Tinman42 » Tue May 24, 2011 6:57 pm UTC

F!@#ing blue shells
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Deva » Tue May 24, 2011 7:36 pm UTC

Wishes driving in real life was like Mario Kart. Sustains no damage from head-on collisions. Fishes you out if you fall off of a cliff or nearly drown. Could distract yourself from the drive by hurling turtle shells at nearby drivers. Does not matter if you travel at the speed of molasses or of a bullet (bill).

Hopes to be able to one day say, "Sorry for arriving late. Was struck by two red shells and a bomb near the highway on-ramp." Would prefer to avoid potential legal repercussions, though, as this video suggests.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Izawwlgood » Tue May 24, 2011 8:00 pm UTC

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-h4zTEwgCpQ

There are a couple of these, but I thought this was pretty well edited.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby You, sir, name? » Tue May 24, 2011 8:30 pm UTC

Izawwlgood wrote:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-h4zTEwgCpQ

There are a couple of these, but I thought this was pretty well edited.


Needs more real life peril: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MytfhzcSF-Y
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby ArgonV » Tue May 24, 2011 9:06 pm UTC

Oregonaut wrote:I need a 500cc to get back into riding again. My shoulder and knee should be ok with it now. But my old 1,000cc crapped out, and is basically a pile of junk anyway. I'm not sure I'd feel comfortable manuevering it anyway right now.


On the topic of bikes, what does the average 750cc bike with a full tank weigh? Something like 200 kgs? I was quite surprised on how heavy they are when you've got to pull them of a person... :P

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Dason » Tue May 24, 2011 9:40 pm UTC

You, sir, name? wrote:
Izawwlgood wrote:http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-h4zTEwgCpQ

There are a couple of these, but I thought this was pretty well edited.


Needs more real life peril: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MytfhzcSF-Y

It was pretty sweet but it was disappointing when the bananas didn't cause the vehicles to go out of control.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby a_fuzzyduck » Tue May 24, 2011 11:24 pm UTC

Deva wrote:Wishes driving in real life was like Mario Kart. Sustains no damage from head-on collisions. Fishes you out if you fall off of a cliff or nearly drown. Could distract yourself from the drive by hurling turtle shells at nearby drivers. Does not matter if you travel at the speed of molasses or of a bullet (bill).

Hopes to be able to one day say, "Sorry for arriving late. Was struck by two red shells and a bomb near the highway on-ramp." Would prefer to avoid potential legal repercussions, though, as this video suggests.


and it doesn't matter if you go loads slower than the other traffic, since the rubber band effect comes into play
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby ArgonV » Tue May 24, 2011 11:58 pm UTC

Yeah, the person in the back always seems to get the Bullet Bill powerup or something similar. Meanwhile, in first position you should be glad with anything that trumps a banana peel.

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Sir_Elderberry » Wed May 25, 2011 1:17 am UTC

Is the AI in recent Mario Karts as much a fucking cheater as it was back in 64 in the "going radically faster than you" department?
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Oregonaut » Wed May 25, 2011 1:48 am UTC

Sir_Elderberry wrote:Is the AI in recent Mario Karts as much a fucking cheater as it was back in 64 in the "going radically faster than you" department?

Yeah. They'll be hot on your butt the entire race, no matter how much detrius you throw at them.
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The EGE wrote:
Mumpy wrote:And to this day, librarians revile Oregonaut as the Antichrist.

False! We sacrifice our card catalogues to him in the name of Job Security!

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby _Axle_ » Wed May 25, 2011 1:52 am UTC

Rubber banding is cheats in racing games. Though, to defend Nintendo's choice... Mario Kart isn't fun if you are way ahead of everyone and you have nothing to fear except random track traps and blue shells.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Tinman42 » Wed May 25, 2011 2:14 am UTC

I like the fact that every time I open this page, the first thing is see written is "small penis?"
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Ivora » Wed May 25, 2011 5:05 am UTC

Speaking Klingon means never having to say you're sorry. :P

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Triangle_Man » Wed May 25, 2011 7:33 am UTC

You know, I think I may have lost my mind, but I have to say this before it consumes me.

Because when I saw on these forums a thread that implicitly and explicitly stated that you simply ceased to exist after death, I think it was the genisis of an exstistential crisis. Because the two methods I have for checking a problem can't work here. There is no way for me to find out what happens after death, and neither can I avoid it...

In fact, what is the point of doing anything if your just going to become nothing and civilization is going to end and the sun will explode and the universe will die and anything you do now will be erased in the future? I'm always angry about never doing anything except dicking around on electronics and shit all day, but why should I do anything more than that if none of it will matter in the end? Why do we even exist if we're just going to end someday?

Clearly, the only way to give anything meaning is to ensure it exists forever and ever and ever and ever and ever; life, the universe and everything must exist forever, must be made to exist forever. Because otherwise...

Fuck, what should we do. What should I do? This is all clearly insane and a waste of forum space and I deserve an infraction, but I'm scared and confused and just numb with terror because these thoughts and fears of my own mortality have taken up an unwanted spot in my life and I need to figure out what I can do about it all...
I really should be working right now, but somehow I don't have the energy.

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Ortus » Wed May 25, 2011 7:51 am UTC

Triangle_Man wrote:You know, I think I may have lost my mind, but I have to say this before it consumes me.

Because when I saw on these forums a thread that implicitly and explicitly stated that you simply ceased to exist after death, I think it was the genisis of an exstistential crisis. Because the two methods I have for checking a problem can't work here. There is no way for me to find out what happens after death, and neither can I avoid it...

In fact, what is the point of doing anything if your just going to become nothing and civilization is going to end and the sun will explode and the universe will die and anything you do now will be erased in the future? I'm always angry about never doing anything except dicking around on electronics and shit all day, but why should I do anything more than that if none of it will matter in the end? Why do we even exist if we're just going to end someday?

Clearly, the only way to give anything meaning is to ensure it exists forever and ever and ever and ever and ever; life, the universe and everything must exist forever, must be made to exist forever. Because otherwise...

Fuck, what should we do. What should I do? This is all clearly insane and a waste of forum space and I deserve an infraction, but I'm scared and confused and just numb with terror because these thoughts and fears of my own mortality have taken up an unwanted spot in my life and I need to figure out what I can do about it all...



Achilles (according to the movie Troy) wanted his name to live forever - assuming the universe and life goes on forever and ever and it never dies a fiery (well...) death, would you then not ask, "what matters now, what matters me, in light of eternity. When memory fades and legends turn to myth, and then die, who was I to the cosmos"? I don't have an answer to that question, or to the question you asked in your post. Both questions are the same, though one assumes much of memory and the other assumes much of the universe.

But I think much the same thoughts as you, and the only way I lay my mind to rest on this particular matter is to focus on what I mean to me, and those around me that I have elevated to the esteemed position in which I hold myself*. I care not so much what matter I am to the cosmos, and pay much more attention to what matter I am to the philosophies and people I care for. Which may not help you at all.

Hrm...





*I'm really not that selfish and self-absorbed. Promise.
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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Link » Wed May 25, 2011 8:01 am UTC

There is no "point". We exist because there's strong selective pressure for wanting to exist. If you don't want to exist, nature will gladly erase you, taking any possible genetic cause for not wanting to exist along with you. It's brutal and frankly rather shitty, but (per Occam's Razor) it's probably the truth.

As for things to do, try one of these:
  • Decide life isn't really that shitty and you might as well make the best of it until the sweet touch of death takes it away.
  • Decide that life is that shitty, and dedicate yourself to making it less so.
  • Decide that regardless of whether life means anything, you do care about others, make the best of it for their sake, and hope they do the same for you.
  • Desperately cling to religion to get a sense of purpose.

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Re: Screechings of the Great Unwashed (Pander to the Borg)

Postby Triangle_Man » Wed May 25, 2011 8:14 am UTC

Admitably, I feel a bit calmed down now, mainly because I was having one of my 'what happens after you die' freakouts and then the extistensialist questions spiraled out as a result of that, which just resulted in these anxieties that wouldn't leave until I addressed them.

Still, I'm getting the impression that the point of living is to make the best of it and not just spiral into dispair because the ending might not be so hot?

And to try and live in the here and now?

Did I get any of that right?
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