Corrupt-a-wish

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lllllllllwith10ls
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby lllllllllwith10ls » Mon Mar 11, 2019 11:16 pm UTC

Your brain gets severed from your body and put in the white house

I wish for a thing that won't harm me directly or indirectly in any way
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Mar 11, 2019 11:43 pm UTC

granted. you get a normal amount of air.

i wish i would remember to clean up after myself.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Tue Mar 12, 2019 8:03 pm UTC

Granted. You always remember, but lack the energy to actually do it.

I wish I had a little more money and a little more free time.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Wed Mar 13, 2019 4:28 pm UTC

granted, you have 100 dollars more, and 1 more hour a day free time.

i wish to learn Japanese within 2 years.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Wed Mar 13, 2019 5:38 pm UTC

Granted. You forget English.

I wish to always have nice weather around me.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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lllllllllwith10ls
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby lllllllllwith10ls » Wed Mar 13, 2019 6:11 pm UTC

Granted. You have a mini sun floating around you, slowly incinerating you and everyone around you

I wish for a new What if question.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Wed Mar 13, 2019 6:25 pm UTC

Granted, it focuses on picking on a specific "if" in the world.

I wish for a "what what" question.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Wed Mar 13, 2019 8:06 pm UTC

what?

i wish for a better understanding of the christian religion.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Wed Mar 13, 2019 10:18 pm UTC

Granted. You now have no understanding at all about any of the other religions, and of the superstitions humans are prey to, and of cultish phenomena in general. You are therefore zealously {for|against} Christianity, and no amount of reasoning makes it better.

I wish that wishing for a wish (to be corrupted here) did not entail insight into a person's personality, so that those using the internet to compile a portfolio of vulnerabilities would be stymied.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Thu Mar 14, 2019 2:53 pm UTC

granted, wishes are much harder to predict the person.

i wish for good thoughts, good dreams, and a joyful life.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby flicky1991 » Fri Mar 15, 2019 12:46 pm UTC

Granted, but all of that only lasts a day.

I wish for perfect eyesight.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Fri Mar 15, 2019 3:48 pm UTC

granted, you no longer need glasses,

i wish to be a better programmer.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Sun Mar 17, 2019 1:52 pm UTC

Granted, you are a better programmer than the average chimpanzee.

I wish my household chores were already done.
Apart from Forum Games, mostly active on the One True Thread.
If you need help understanding what's going on there, the xkcd Time Wiki may be useful.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Peaceful Whale » Sun Mar 17, 2019 6:59 pm UTC

Granted. Your house burns down. Now everything is clean!

I wish for a fish.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby flicky1991 » Sun Mar 17, 2019 7:15 pm UTC

Granted. You get eaten by a shark.

I wish for the ability to change sex at will.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Mar 17, 2019 11:12 pm UTC

granted, you need to fast for 24 hours to switch.

i wish...hmmm. i wish for a good friend that lives nearby.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby flicky1991 » Mon Mar 18, 2019 1:23 pm UTC

Granted - the Earth becomes a lot smaller so all your friends live nearby. Sorry about all the destruction of the environment and geography though.

I wish I had more free time.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Mar 18, 2019 5:13 pm UTC

granted you no longer have to buy time.

i wish i stay good for the rest of my life.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Mon Mar 18, 2019 8:52 pm UTC

Granted. The next time you try to do something bad, you die before you succeed in your pecadillo.

I wish the sun's path was on the other side of my house.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Mon Mar 18, 2019 10:16 pm UTC

Granted, no corruption necessary. Just wait for 12 hours and the Sun will be on the other side of anything. The Earth might be in the way, though.

I wish everybody would just get along better.
Apart from Forum Games, mostly active on the One True Thread.
If you need help understanding what's going on there, the xkcd Time Wiki may be useful.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Wed Mar 20, 2019 12:32 am UTC

that's pretty much already true. most people, normal people will do just about anything to avoid a fight.

i wish for a sword made out of unbreakable glass and has sharp edges. (i'm just being a little silly with this.)
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Wed Mar 20, 2019 2:52 pm UTC

Granted. It has the refractive index of air. You immediately lose it, but mysterious painful cuts and lacerations appear on people who visit, some of them serious enough to generate lawsuits. The blood stains everything, your house is condemned and declared to be haunted in a futile attempt to prevent people from dying from this mysterious malady.

I wish to be able to remember anything I wanted to remember (or would have wanted to remember had I realized at the time that I'd want to remember it).

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Wed Mar 20, 2019 6:54 pm UTC

granted you have perfect recall.

i wish i knew what to do next.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Thu Mar 21, 2019 5:37 am UTC

Granted. You remember that what you must do next is to corrupt a wish in the most amusingly evil fashion imaginable...as a warning to anybody who would actually make such a wish if they encountered a real wish-granting genie. To not do that lulls people into a false sense of security, and then they end up with real corruption when it counts the most. Unfortunately, you remember this too late, and thousands of people run into real wish-granting genies, without the wisdom they could have acquired here. The results are not pretty.

I wish for a battery compartment that holds ten AA batteries in series, with a type N connector correctly wired to supply approximately 11-15 volts (depending on the condition of the batteries) to devices connected to it.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Fri Mar 22, 2019 1:23 am UTC

granted, its a little pricey but available.

i wish for a loving personality.
good luck have fun

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lllllllllwith10ls
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby lllllllllwith10ls » Fri Mar 22, 2019 6:25 pm UTC

Granted. Your personality loves yourself way too much, and it makes you seem like a narcissist, and everyone hates you now

I wish to be more motivated to do things
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sat Mar 23, 2019 7:33 pm UTC

granted but the motivation is proportional to the difficulty of the task.


i wish to feel full after every meal.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby svenman » Sat Mar 23, 2019 7:43 pm UTC

Granted. You feel full constantly, which unfortunately makes it very difficult to enjoy a meal.

I wish the garden would take care of itself.
Apart from Forum Games, mostly active on the One True Thread.
If you need help understanding what's going on there, the xkcd Time Wiki may be useful.

Addams thanks all of us who helped. Her life is much better now.

Randallspeed to all blitzers on the One True Thread!

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Sun Mar 24, 2019 1:45 am UTC

granted, the plants automatically kill weeds, and find the optimal growth rate.

i wish to be happy every day.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Sun Mar 24, 2019 3:09 pm UTC

Granted. But you make everyone else miserable, and they kill you. At least you die happy.

I wish the headphone jack on my laptop worked.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Mon Mar 25, 2019 1:06 am UTC

granted.

i wish every one gets what they truly desire, based on their goodness.
good luck have fun

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Fri Mar 29, 2019 2:59 pm UTC

ucim wrote:I wish the headphone jack on my laptop worked.
Jose


Granted. It works as a pencil sharpener.

C
phillip1882 wrote:i wish every one gets what they truly desire, based on their goodness.


Granted. If you have a lot of goods and material possessions, you're rewarded with what you desire. But if you're poor, you get nothing. Essentially, you've just contributed to financial inequality.
Carry the black torch! Rouse the idle dead!
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Fri Mar 29, 2019 3:27 pm UTC

bug sniper wrote:_______. I_ w____ __ _ ____i_ shARP____.

____t__. __ _o_ have a lot of _____ ___ ________ ________, ___'__ _______ ____ ____ ___ desire. ___ __ ___'__ poor, ___ ___ ______. ___________, ___'__ ____ contr_____ _o ________l __________.
Granted, we're inflicted with a plague of handsey elderly people.

I wish for a cure for cancer.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Fri Mar 29, 2019 3:34 pm UTC

granted.

i wish for a fun game.
good luck have fun

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bug sniper
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby bug sniper » Sat Mar 30, 2019 6:59 am UTC

Granted. You get an angry elephant charging towards you and a rifle of sufficient caliber, but with one bullet. Aim well and make it count.

I wish
Quizatzhaderac wrote:I wish for a cure for cancer.


Granted, but it's your own blood. You can look forward to a needle every time you want to save someone 's life.

Let's make this simple. I wish for giant Belgian waffles.
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flicky1991
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby flicky1991 » Wed Apr 03, 2019 6:37 pm UTC

Granted. They're in Belgium, though.

I wish for as much money as I'll ever need.
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Thu Apr 04, 2019 1:07 am UTC

granted. id recommend investing it though so you'll be prepared when hyper inflation comes.

i wish all the sick are cured.
good luck have fun

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ucim
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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby ucim » Thu Apr 04, 2019 2:03 am UTC

Granted. All the non-sick people get painful terminal diseases.

I wish politics (and politicians) were not self-serving.

Jose
Order of the Sillies, Honoris Causam - bestowed by charlie_grumbles on NP 859 * OTTscar winner: Wordsmith - bestowed by yappobiscuts and the OTT on NP 1832 * Ecclesiastical Calendar of the Order of the Holy Contradiction * Heartfelt thanks from addams and from me - you really made a difference.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby Quizatzhaderac » Thu Apr 04, 2019 3:11 pm UTC

Granted, the politicians now serve the chaos gods.

I wish for a slow news day.
The thing about recursion problems is that they tend to contain other recursion problems.

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Re: Corrupt-a-wish

Postby phillip1882 » Thu Apr 04, 2019 4:50 pm UTC

granted. its only for today though.

i wish i knew what to wish for.
good luck have fun


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